Anorak News | O Brother, Who Art Thou?

O Brother, Who Art Thou?

by | 6th, February 2004

‘AS predicted by anyone who’s ever watched a single episode of a soap in their lives, Ronnie does need a kidney transplant and – what a surprise – secret long-lost brother Tariq is his only chance.

Barry enacts another crime of passion

In a plot that a Christmas cracker joke-writer would be ashamed of, Ronnie was stabbed in a street fight and rushed to hospital where doctors discovered that he only had one kidney and that had packed up.

“We need to test all members of the family to see if they’re a match,” an extra from Holby City told Adi, Kareena and Ash. And, of course, none of them were.

So with both their mother and father conveniently away, it looked like there was no hope for Ronnie. Until – what a surprise! Mickey told Kareena that Tariq was their half brother.

Thursday night’s episode featured the Ferreiras trying to come to terms with the news that their father had had a seven-year affair and that Kareena had dated her brother.

“You’re sick!” she screamed at him. “How could you?” “I just wanted to feel like I belonged,” he told her. Belonged to what? An incest ring?

Tariq is refusing to go for tests to see if he’s a suitable donor. “Why should I?” he shouted. “From the moment you lot found out, you’ve been looking at me like I’m a piece of rotten meat.” Rotten ham, one suspects.

Elsewhere in The Square, Ricky packed up son Liam and his overalls and left Walford for good. Janine told Ricky the truth about what happened in Scotland. “Yes! All right! I killed him,” she screamed. “I couldn’t bear another moment of that fat git pawing me.”

Ricky may only have half a brain, but even he realised that murder is murder. “You’re sick, Janine, get away from me!”

Ricky agreed not to tell the police, but decided to leave the Square – please God, not for another attempt at the singles chart.

Before he left, however, he gave Pat plenty of clues as to the real reason why he was going. Will Pat turn detective (Hercule Poirot in big earrings) and take on Janine?

With actress Charlie Brooks set to leave Walford this year, it’s a pretty safe bet her days of – literally – getting away with murder, are numbered.’

Posted: 6th, February 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink