Anorak News | Family Affairs

Family Affairs

by | 25th, February 2004

‘IT’S Valentine’s Day in Albert Square, and this being Eastenders, producers decided to mark it by getting a brother and sister to end up in bed together. Admittedly, Sharon and Dennis are siblings in name only but, even so, there’s something slightly grubby about seeing two people who call the same person ‘dad’ in bed together.


And in another stomach-churning storyline, Sonia is supposed to be undergoing some sort of transformation from potato woman to sexual goddess. “You’re stunning,“ Vicky told her when she found Sonia weeping on the stairs. “Stunning” in the sense that anyone who looks at her can’t move or speak for several minutes, one can only assume.

Sonia had decided that she couldn’t go to the Valentine’s Ball with Martin as she was too fat and ugly so Vicky promised to give her a makeover. A makeover into what? A fat ugly girl in bad make up and a too tight dress? Because that’s exactly what she looked like.

Martin seemed happy enough though: I suppose a couple of years in prison is bound to make a man a lot less fussy in the lady department. Dot is less impressed with the New Look Sonia. “Don’t change yourself for a man Sonia,” she warned her. “They’re never worth it.”

Dot shouldn’t worry about Sonia wasting her money on new clothes – how many size 20 boob tubes are there out there to buy?

Elsewhere in The Square, Ronnie has come out of his coma (it did take me several episodes to realise this, given his less than spectacular acting skills). Ronnie was dumb struck (the one acting expression he can actually do) on hearing the news that Tariq is his secret half brother and the only chance he’s got for a new kidney.

“We’ve got to keep Tariq sweet ‘til after the operation,” Adi told his brothers, “then after that we never have to see him again.” Adi looks set to get his wish a lot sooner than that though as Tariq overheard every word and has disappeared out of the hospital.

With two members of the Ferreira family now missing and one in critical condition in hospital, things are finally looking up in Eastenders.

There’s more good news in store too as Laura Beale is set to get killed off. The ginger hamster is to be another victim of Janine. Butcher by name, butcher by nature….’

Posted: 25th, February 2004 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink