The Greatest Love Of All

‘WE have not heard much from Paul Burrell of late, and have been concerned for his welfare.

‘England’s Rose – £6 a dozen!’

So we climbed into our somewhat battered white Fiat Uno and spent many hours scouring both this land and the one across the channel for signs of that rock of a man.

We have been down tunnels, through sewer systems, upstairs and downstairs in search of the man who dared.

And then we found him. Of all the places in the world, Burrell is in Hello!, and it’s as if he’s never been away as he talks up a storm about his former employer, Princess Diana.

While he emotes and beats himself up, giving full throat to his pain in a serve-and-tell book, others, like us, just try to get on with day-to-day life since our heart was wrenched from our chests.

But why can he not move on? Is he obsessed? ‘You give up your life for you master or your mistress,’ says Burrell. ‘That’s what I did. I gave up my life for the Princess.’

Er, correction. No, you did not. Indeed, if only Burrell had, then she’d still be shopping in Harvey Nichols and he’d be out of earshot.

Not that she ever left us – not really. When asked whether he believed Diana would have approved of his new book, Burrell is oddly positive.

‘I think she’s shouting right now, ‘Do it!’ She’s saying: ‘Stand up and be counted. Don’t let them erase my memory. Don’t let them change history. You were there. You heard everything, saw it. It was part of your life.’

So much for shy Di, who cannot be shut up now she’s been shut up.

Or has she? Perhaps she is shouting right now, as Burrell claims.

After all, he also says she needed marriage like a ‘bad rash’ and was not in love with Dodi Fayed, although he was in love with her.

Could Diana really be alive, having faked her own death in an elaborate bid to escape marriage?

Were those dresses and trinkets found in Burrell’s pad not for him and his safe-keeping, but for Diana to wear in her Miss Haversham moments?

Check the attic at the Burrell place and you may be in for a surprise. That is Princess Diana, alive and well.

And, for the biggest shock of all, she’s wearing clothes that went out of fashion years ago…’

Posted: 3rd, March 2004 | In: Reviews Comment | TrackBack | Permalink