Anorak News | Four Play

Four Play

by | 14th, January 2005

‘THERE is sports reporting – and there is the Sun.

”No sweat”

This is the paper that dares use its back page to tell the world that David Beckham thinks it would be good if Chelsea won the quadruple.

Day-vid does not tell us in Spanish; instead he opts to have another bash at speaking English – and without the need to wear a hat suspiciously covering up his ears.

“It is great for football there are teams going for these sorts of things,” says Dave of the Blues’ assault on four fronts. “And anything is possible.”

Well, not anything, Dave. For starters, it’s almost impossible to get a good, reliable PA is Madrid.

And it’s pretty darn hard for the Sun to mention cricket in its lead story unless England have been annihilated or a player has been caught sticking drugs up his nose.

But, thankfully, the Telegraph does note that England are playing a Test match in South Africa and that Andrew Strauss is fast emerging as one of the country’s greatest ever players.

Yesterday, the Johannesburg-born England opener hit a superb 147 runs as England reached 263 for the loss of four wickets.

This is nothing short of sensational – all the more so when the paper reminds us that in his 11 Tests thus far, Strauss has scored 1,202 runs at an average of 63.6 runs an innings.

British sportsmen like Strauss should be applauded loud and long. Here’s a player blessed with studious concentration, talent and dedication.

But only time will tell if he can stick his hair in a pony tail and wiggle his shaved backside into his wife’s knickers and so achieve true iconic status in the tabloids.

But however terrific Strauss is, football can not be ignored for long. And it’s a cautionary tale in the Independent.

The sad news for Leeds United’s abused supporters is that Sebastien Sainsbury has decided against buying the Yorkshire club.

This means that, although Leeds insist there are other parties interested in investing in the club, no offer is actually on the table.

And that is no good for a club that is still losing masses of money.

And when asked what this meant for the club, Leeds chairman Gerald Krasner made pained noises.

“Eventually it [administration] will happen,” says he. “It’s not going to happen today or tomorrow but unless something positive happens it will happen.”

So, if there are any Russian billionaires reading this, your help is urgently needed at one of the big names of English football.

And if you want to invest in Anorak – We’re No.1 in Leeds – you can have that, too…’

Posted: 14th, January 2005 | In: Back pages Comment | TrackBack | Permalink