Anorak News | Bench Press

Bench Press

by | 24th, January 2005

‘THE picture of Craig Bellamy, the unlovely Newcastle United striker, on the Independent’s back page is surprising in that it does not shows the Welshman offering a broad self-satisfied smirk to the camera.

Bellamy is congratulated by all his friends

To put the picture on context, Bellamy was warming the bench for his club’s trip to Arsenal and had just seen the Gunners secure a fine 1-0 win.

And he was unlikely to ever get on the pitch since, as the paper says, he had just had a “dramatic row” with his team’s manager Graeme Souness.

There are accusations that the striker feigned an injury because he didn’t want to play in the position Souness had ordered him to occupy.

After being detailed to play on the left side of a five-man midfield, the charmless so-and-so walked out of a training session and then reported back to camp with a “hamstring injury”.

Meanwhile, on the field of play, the Telegraph watched Arsenal “launch mission possible”, as the Gunners moved to a mere 10 points of Premiership leaders Chelsea.

Overhauling the free-spending Blues will be a major task – and one this column does not see happening – but it is possible and, while it remains so, Arsene Wenger says it’s a “challenge”.

Elsewhere in football, the Guardian has an idea of what happened to Jonathan Woodgate. The man who made a surprising move from Newcastle to Real Madrid last summer has been spotted in the doctor’s rooms.

And the news is grim indeed, with fears that the centre-back’s ruptured tendon in his left thigh – “an extremely complex and apparently mystifying injury” (see Bellamy) – may put an end to his career.

Poor him! And unlucky Akebono, the former Japanese sumo champion who has returned to the ring as a kick boxer of no discernible talent.

As the Times reports, the lumbering fighter has to date been knocked out six times in six fights, lasting less than 180 seconds in total.

“Anywhere else in the world, Akenbo’s humiliation would be a cause for mockery,” says the paper, which has clearly not noted the election of the saucer-eyed, untalented Bez as Big Brother’s top celebrity.

But in Japan, he is a hero, who in spite of his obvious failings epitomises the warrior spirit. And he vows to continue “until I win”.

Or until, he falls on his sword. Or, better still, Craig Bellamy…’

Posted: 24th, January 2005 | In: Back pages Comment | TrackBack | Permalink