Anorak News | Rooney With A View

Rooney With A View

by | 7th, October 2005

‘ANYONE with £16million to spare can now buy the home lived in by a once happy and very much in love Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt.

Cruelly, just as renovations to their home were being completed, Jen and Brad’s marriage began to crumble like so much old masonry.

But now the home could be yours. And the Sun is keen to secure a deal. The paper dons a pink shirt, contorts its face into a syrupy grin and becomes an estate agent.

And you can but fail to be impressed by the sprawling house? Spice up your lives in the shower for two. Chow down with the great and good at a glass-top table in the modern dining room. Sip a cocktail at the bar. And unwind in the white bedroom, equipped with fireplace and optional his ‘n’ hers tea’s maids.

Or buy three of Wayne Rooney and Coleen’s new mansion, which, as the Mail says, is very nearly ready for them to move in.

“Chav Towers” has been built at a cost of more than £4.5million, and boasts its own five-a-side football pitch, and basketball, tennis and badminton courts.

While it’s hard to see Wayne and Coleen hitting a shuttlecock back and forth across the net of an evening, it’s easier to imagine her luxuriating in the pink Roman bath while Wayne chills out in the Wild West cinema.

It all sounds just brilliant. And we marvel at the Mail’s news that plans are afoot to have the marbled hall inlaid with the initials of the new owners’ first names – WC.

Which is well nice…’

Posted: 7th, October 2005 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink