Anorak News | Dolly Die

Dolly Die

by | 19th, December 2005

‘IF only Christmas could be moved to January, shoppers could take advantage of the winter sales.

Al-Jazeera releases picture of kidnapped and tortured American

But stores are not heartless outlets of Mammon, and, as the Telegraph reports, purveyors of tat are getting into the Christmas spirit by slashing prices.

And that’s good news for mankind. According to research company TNS, 60 per cent of men describe themselves as last-minute or panic buyers – worried that if Jesus’s birthday is not celebrated with a new MP3 player, a catering pack of individual butters or a copy of Cliff Sings Kylie, the Devil will have won and darkness will descend upon humanity.

But the frantic man should take care. While buying a gift is vital, buying the wrong kind of gift can be dangerous.

Little Armani might have liked that Barbie doll when she was aged three, but now she’s seven she will see the little plastic figurine as a paragon of pure evil. She will want to kill it.

The Times has seen a study produced by academics at the University of Bath, which investigated the role of brands among children aged 7 to 11-years-old.

And the verdict is that they all hate Barbie. “You might expect little girls to love their Barbie and expect an imaginary love in return,” says researcher Agnes Nairn. “Instead girls feel violence and hatred towards their Barbie.”

Babies are expendable. Rather than loving Barbie, and putting her into little pink plastic car and driving of to her compact and bijou beach house, prepubescent girls want to torture her.

As the Telegraph explains, this torture takes in cutting off Barbie’s hair, decapitation and cooking her in the microwave.

Videos of which are readily available to view on al-Jazeera TV’s Christmas special…’

Posted: 19th, December 2005 | In: Uncategorized Comment | TrackBack | Permalink