Anorak News | Not Wright

Not Wright

by | 8th, July 2006

“I’M not happy this morning.” What’s wrong, Ian? It’s Ian Wright, and when Ian’s not happy something must be badly wrong with the world.

 “I should be glad to be at home but I’m not and you all know where I’d rather be.”

 This is not exactly the kind of thing Mrs Ian Wright and the couple’s assorted little Ian Wrights will be happy to hear. No sooner has husband and father returned from wearing pressed shirts in Germany than he’s telling Sun readers that he’d rather be somewhere else.

 And, no, he wouldn’t rather be in eating a hot jacket potato in his local Spud U Like. He’d rather be in Germany, standing in Berlin with a red and white plastic bowler hat on his head, an inflatable Spitfire in his hand and cheering the England team on to certain victory.

 Sadly, it was not meant to be. But even an unhappy Ian remains hopeful. His thoughts turn to Euro 2008. Ian has picked his team for the next tournament. And at its helm is Shaun Wright-Philips, his son.

 But Ian will not be picking the team in any official capacity. As England’s cheerleader-in-chief, Ian will be watching England play from the BBC’s sofa.

 The man in charge of team selection will be Steve McClaren. And the Mirror’s Brian Reade says he’s not up to it. McClaren’s appointment has “locked England into a foolish strait-jacket”. He is Sven Goran Eriksson’s “equally culpable deputy”.

 This McClaren is just another Sven, albeit with better teeth and a big smile – even if it is a syrupy smile of smug self-satisfaction.

 But before we get too deeply immersed in the drive to destroy McClaren – let’s no peak too nearly – and start blaming his ginger hair for England’s failure, the Guardian reminds us that even with England out, the game must go on.

 Sure, the main attraction has been struck down. England, the team a hobbling Michael Owen says was “the best” in the tournament are out. And a world weeps. But the game goes on.

 But it’s not use pretending. The World Cup final is nothing without England. Better to just read the Mail and its leading story that Newcastle want to buy Ruud van Nistelrooy.

 It’s the big news in football. And it’s got England, and Ian Wright, buzzing again…

Posted: 8th, July 2006 | In: Back pages Comment | TrackBack | Permalink