Anorak News | Stars & Gripes

Stars & Gripes

by | 4th, December 2006

GWYNETH Paltrow, the Oscar-winning actress, has something she’d like to share with us.

“The British are much more intelligent and civilised than the Americans,” says Paltrow.

She is too, too kind. We blush a deep pink and stammer a “thank you”. To further show our appreciation, we bare our chests, flash our knickers, pull up our hoods and run about the shopping precinct with our willies hanging out, as tradition dictates.

The Mirror hears more. Los Angeles-born Gwyneth is in conversation with Portuguese newspaper Diario de Noticias. Says she: “I don’t fit into the bad side of American psychology.”

It’s is hard to know exactly what Paltrow means by that. What is the bad side of the American psychology? Can you pick and chose the bets bits from each country and make them parts of your own self? Can you have only the good and leave the bad? And is the desire for all cream and no sour milk not the American dream?

It might just be that in dismissing the country of her birth, the country that helped form her and shape her successful career, Paltrow is displaying her essential American nature. Would a Britisher speak of the British psychology? And, if they did, would we allow them to live among us?

Whatever Paltrow does mean, the Mirror says her comments have “triggered a furious backlash in the US”. This use of the word trigger is unfortunate given that Americans are wont to carry firearms.

While Americans plot to bomb Paltrow’s London home, the Mail hears more from the actress. “I love the English lifestyle. It’s not as capitalistic as America,” says she.

Oh? What can the multi-millionairess mean? “People don’t talk about work and money, they talk about interesting things at dinner.”

Indeed. We British find the idea of money vulgar and distasteful. Moreover work. The prescribed British dinner party chatter constitutes in-depth conversations on property, reality TV and football.

And whether the American dinner guest will eat the kebab al mode or prefer something more macrobiotic…

Posted: 4th, December 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink