Clooney’s Pig Out

GEORGE Clooney is in mourning?

No, he has not lost his looks. Pray god that never happens. Hollywood’s finest has lost his pig. And not just any pig but Max, his pet pot-bellied pig.

The Mail (“Grunt in peace”) hears from grief-stricken Clooney. “It has been a bad year for my pets,” says he unscripted. “I had a bulldog that died this year too. It’s strange how animals become a big part of your family.”

And while the women have come and gone Max has stayed – Clooney bought the pig for his then lover Kelly Preston, who went on to marry John Travolta. She left George and Max behind.

In the Express, the news is just as grim. “GEORGE: PIG IS DEAD, NOW FOR THE CRACKLING.”
Sure the Star cannot be suggesting that Clooney eats his dead family member, serving him up with the apple sauce, saving only the squeak as a memento of happier, livelier times?

Clooney is said to be “inconsolable with grief”. But Clooney does mange to say: “He was an old a pig as the vets had seen. He’s been a big part of my life.”

At 300lbs, Clooney’s not kidding.

And it may be that Max is irreplaceable. Unless, of course, Clooney chooses to replace Max with a prize poker of another sort. There may be hope for American womanhood yet…

Posted: 5th, December 2006 | In: Tabloids Comment | TrackBack | Permalink