Cherie Blair’s Bad Air(port) Day
“I AM no more a terrorist than Cherie Blair is.”
So says the unnamed passenger waiting to board a flight at London City Airport.
No-one can be above suspicion in the ensuing war on terror. And certainly not the Prime Minster’s wife, who has voiced an opinion on the matter of suicide bombing.
In such a climate, the Sun looks on as Cherie Blair approaches the border guards.
The paper reports that she has in her possession three pieces of hand luggage.
This is in clear breach of Blair’s Terror Laws No.3208a that states no passengers shall have on their person any more than one item of luggage.
But Cherie will not be denied. As the Sun says, for a full eight minutes she puts her case to the hapless airport worker.
This is a war of attrition. There can be only one winner. And Cherie is allowed to pass with all bags intact and about her person.
The passenger behind is outraged. They ask the aforesaid question. And they put forward another puzzler: “Why should there be one rule for her and one for me?”
The simple answer is that it is because Cherie’s husband and his coterie make the laws. Tough luck that this passenger married badly. Dim foresight dictates they must place one of their two bags in the hold.
As another witness says: “She had a handbag, another bag and quite a large holdall. She was becoming agitated, but determined to get her way.”
Had Cherie been a terrorist this would have been the time to panic, or else detonate the explosives.
But it turns out that beardless Cherie was not packing an explosive device. And she was not travelling alone. Her spokeswoman tells us: “There were three people in Mrs Blair’s party and three pieces of hand luggage. The rules were met. We rest our case.”
Pity that the language of the courtroom should infiltrate everyday life. But this is Blair’s Britain.
There was no argument. There was no hissy fit. Asked if there was an “extended talk” with staff beyond normal safety questions, Cherie’s spokeswoman confirmed: “That is my understanding.”
At least it is to the best of her recollection.
The matter of Cherie’s carbon footprint will appear before the jury at a later date…
Posted: 24th, March 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (9) | TrackBack | Permalink
