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Anorak | An Exclusive Chat With Cheryl Cole And Victoria Beckham

An Exclusive Chat With Cheryl Cole And Victoria Beckham

by | 4th, February 2009

CHERYL Cole says Victoria Beckham is “AN INCREDIBLE WOMAN”.

Cheryl Cole tells OK! readers that “THERE’S NO FEUD.”

Well, so says a “close pal” of the singer (that’s Cheryl – Posh has been banned from singing by a special UN resolution).

It’s a case of Heads and Tales once more in OK, where the front-page screamer – “The pair talk friendship and reveal the people who’ve let them down most” – fails to match the truth that Posh and Cheryl are not in interview together. Indeed, they are not in interview individually, either.

OK! fails to mention that Cheryl and Vicky talk friendship and stuff with a mutual friend who then tells OK!. This mutual friend might happen to work, say, for 19 management, the firm that represents both women, or a celebrity medium who communicates with stars as they sleep, unbeknownst to them.

It is left to OK!’s in-house hack to fill in the gaps between the source’s asides and past quotes to how Cheryl is terrific and Her Poshness even terrificker, and wondering if the women will ever be best friends and wear matching toasters in an Surrey nightclub.

To illustrate just how eerily similar the women are, OK! shows them with their footballer husbands – Posh with the more talented and likable Day-vid; Cheryl with the vomitous Ashley Cole, a man possessed of that quality star gazers call “the un-likeability factor.

And there’s a shot of Cheryl with a ginger friend (Nicola Roberts) and Posh with a ginger friend (Geri Halliwell), proving that neither are gingerist. And to put the tin lid on their uncannily mirrored lives, there’s Cheryl chatting a mobile phone and Vicky chatting on a mobile phone.

Maybe the pair are speaking to each other or have dialled an exclusive celebrity service that counts down the number of calories you’ve burnt while sat on the phone (dialling a ten digit number scorches a whopping 2 calories, explaining why Dav-vid went to international dialling code Italy and the couple only speak for three seconds before hanging up and redialling).

Says Cheryl:

“We have to very aware of all this, who we are prepared to let into our lives.”

Teeth and tits, girls. Here comes Simon Cowell now…



Posted: 4th, February 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink