Jacqui Smith Introduces ID Cards For Porn

ID Cards are being trialled in Manchester.

The card will cost £30 and the shops will charge another £30 to collect the data, which will be stored on a Government database.

Says Phwaooah! Jacqui Smith on plans to introduce card purchases to chemists and other stores:

“While private companies will clearly benefit from the increased footfall from offering this service, their customers will benefit from being able to quickly provide their biometrics while they are out doing the shopping.”

To the shop:

Mr Smith: “Just this.”

Places bundle of organs on the counter.

Shopkeeper: “Aviation Monthly… And these, sir?”

Mr Smith: “Y-Yes.”

Shopkeeper: “Brown bag, sir? £98.53, please, sir. And your ID card, sir.”

Mr Smith hands over card.

Shopkeeper: “It says you’re married, sir. And that you are white. I believe this copy of Asian Babes supports stereotypical views that Asian woman are servile and there to serve the white man’s needs. The card says your wife is white, sir, and own a bath plug. And what the interest in Aviation, sir? Your data says you are one sixteenth Turkish.”

Presses panic button.

Police arrive, with numbers removed  from shoulder straps, and drag Mr Smith away to an unmarked car for screening…

Image: hack

Anorak

Posted: 6th, May 2009 | In: Politicians Comment | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink