Mel Gibson’s Immaculate Russian Give Birth Melanie Mary Passion Sugartits Eva Beaver Gibson

MEL GIBSON, not to outdone by Kai Wayne Rooney and parents, has become a dad, via the Russian vessel Oksana Grigorieva.

Mel’s a hardcore Catholic divorcee, so his child born out wedlock should be called Melanie Mary Passion Sugartits Eva Beaver Gibson. It’s a girl!

While we wonder how the news addition can fit with Mel’s new film, the ever vigilant 14, puts pen to ink:

Mel Gibson plays Walter Black, a depressed man who finds a beaver puppet in the trash and believes it’s real and is able to give him advice.  When I saw the disconcerting photos of Mel running around yelling with the beaver puppet on his arm scattered across the internet, I was instantly hooked.

However, I wondered if the film would become a tad more interesting if it was the Beaver who found the Mel Gibson puppet in the trash and once sliding his arm inside the filthy and threadbare puppet, he could never get it off. To make it more improbable, perhaps the Beaver could be a recently unemployed, but highly educated and distinguished butler from London. Since there’s no way to remove the Mel Gibson puppet from his arm, he has no choice but to be in service to it. The film follows the life of the tortured Beaver as he gracefully endures the tequila-guzzling exploits of the trash talking Mel Gibson puppet as it wreaks havoc across Malibu.

That Damned Beaver will not be in theaters soon…

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, November 2009 | In: Celebrities Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink