Anorak News | Tiger Woods: More Women Fail To Deny Affair And Ryder Cup Joy

Tiger Woods: More Women Fail To Deny Affair And Ryder Cup Joy

by | 20th, December 2009

tiger-golf1TIGER Woods: grim news for the wayward golfer as Katie Price fails to go on the record and deny shagging Woods – as do Susan Boyle, Cherie Blair, Oprah Winfrey and millions more of potential lovers. But the Mirror has some good news for Tiger – at last:

“Mauled Tiger Woods gets Ryder Cup boost”

Who read that and doesn’t think, ‘He’s not been picked to play’?

All Tiger’s women  (alleged) in pictures (NSFW)

Turns out that the boost to Woods who has retired from the public eye is that American Ryder Cup captain Corey Pavin wants Tiger Woods on his team at Celtic Manor.

Happy days, Tiger. Now you get to play in the UK in a contest that has become increasingly bitchy in recent years.

Now you can stand before a UK audience and be a) not abused in any way, thus cranking up the tension and making any abuse all the more damaging; b) the target of football terrace-style chants –

On the twelfth day of Tiger’s Christmas, my true loves sent to me
12 PRs Drumming
Eleven golfers hoping
Ten Broads A Tweeting
Nine Strippers Dancing
Eight Kiss ‘n’ Tells A Milking
Seven Woods a Swinging
Six Waitresses a Laying
Five Golden Nipple Rings
Four Texting Birds
Three Perfect Tens
Two Porn Stars
and an SUV in a Neighbours Tree

c) give tabloid headline writers more grist for the mill.

All Tiger’s women  (alleged) in pictures (NSFW)

The one fear is that Woods’ Women join those hideous American Stepford golf wives who trampled on the green before Europe’s Jose Maria Olazabal’s crucial putt on the 17th green at Brookline in 1999. He missed. If Tiger’s women are in town the green could resemble a ploughed field.

Use the dirt wedge, Jose.

Posted: 20th, December 2009 | In: Key Posts, Sports Comment | TrackBack | Permalink