Queen Elizabeth signs new five-year deal with Team UK
HER Majesty Queen Elizabeth 2 has rededicated herself to the service of Britain. Her decision to remain on the throne and take herself off the transfer list was down to the “resilience, ingenuity and tolerance” of the supporters.
The 85-year-old stalwart, who has in recent weeks been linked with moves to the Arab Emirates, an independent Scotland, Italy, Russia, Portugal and China, performed a dramatic U-turn and committed herself to Team UK for five more years. The new deal takes in a buy-out clause of £2.2bn, a testimonial at 90 and a guarantee of first-team handshaking opportunities.
“In the last couple of days, I’ve talked to the manager [me] and the owners [me again] and they’ve convinced me this is where I belong. I’m signing a new deal in the absolute belief that the team are utterly committed to making sure The UK maintains its proud winning history — which is the reason I joined the country in the first place.
“The fans have been brilliant with me since I arrived and it’s up to me through my performances to win them over again.”
The decision leaves Prince Charles on the sub’s bench. His agent says, “Charles will continue to give his full backing to the current regime and hopes that in time he can be allowed to shine.”
San Remo and Austria are thought to be monitoring the situation closely.