Anorak News | Big Bother’s Wrong Un: Carole Rumbles Patricia

Big Bother’s Wrong Un: Carole Rumbles Patricia

by | 10th, July 2007

CAROLE Vincent has twigged that Patricia is as genuine as Charley’s hair.

This does not mark Carole out as any planet-sized brain. Chances are high that in the course of her many protests Carole happened upon SM:TV on Saturday morning telly and saw Pauline “Poo” the fake Australian housemate (Thaila Zucchi).

Thalia was once part of The Allstars, the main feature of a TV show called Starstreet. Like The Monkeys, this story of a fake band turned into reality – Allstars had four top-20 hits in what counts for the real world.

And then there is Carole, who knows everything about everything. The shock would be if Carole took anything at face value. Carole (3-1 to finish in the top four) looks for hidden depth and meanings in everything. Carole knows. She may even know what Samanda is talking about.

“Pauline looks like someone from a teen movie!” says Samanda (Amanda is 6-1 to win the show). She does. And someone from a children’s TV show called The Allstars. Samanda is 19 and most likely watched the show and wanted to be Patricia.

And of course Patricia is not Australian. Says Carole: “If you’re an Australian there are certain things you know. She’s not Australian.”

Patricia doesn’t even do a decent Australian accent. Anyone who has ever been served in bar, smacked by a huge backpack on the Tube or been institutionalised and forced to watch Ozzie daytime soaps (or worked as a journalist) know how to speaks Aussie. It’s the vocal equivalent of taking a cotton wool bud, removing the soft bit and inserting it into your ear. Hard.

There is also the added problem that unlike all young Australians, Patricia doesn’t talk constantly about “home” and hang about with other Australians.

But she has yet to be exposed. Ziggy would surely like to do just that. And we’d wish it on him just to see the look on Chanelle’s face and how tiny her knickers get in her bid to be seen and liked. (Chanelle is drifting to 14-1.)

But Patricia will be sussed. Anorak predicts he will be outted by Tracey (59-1 to win) who has most likely watched lots of children’s morning telly and enjoys a good conspiracy theory.

Which all makes us wonder what Patricia is doing in the house. And if “Poo” will cause a stink for anything other than her fast going-off acting career?

Posted: 10th, July 2007 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink