Anorak News | Bin Laden’s Jewish Relatives And Satan’s Slaves

Bin Laden’s Jewish Relatives And Satan’s Slaves

by | 16th, July 2007

binladen.jpgIF they can’t be at the wedding in person, a father of the bride or groom might send a telegram.

And here’s Osama bin Laden sending his boy Omar bin Laden a goodwill video message. The Bin Ladens embrace technology, they move with the times.

“The happy [man] is the one that god has chosen to be his martyr,” says Osama. Omar and his bride Jane Felix-Browne exchange knowing glances.

The clip is less then 60 seconds long. The tape continues for 40 minutes, the remainder made up of footage of dad’s pals on the Stag do to the Hindu Kush. There is shooting, slitting throats and inspirational songs about girls from Kandahar.

Omar bin Laden, a scrap metal dealer, says his new bride is just great. The Sun says Jane Felix-Browne had a Jewish grandfather. Omar says: “Her nationality is not an issue. What is important is her religion and manner.”

“Polygamy is not strange in our Arab Islamic society,” says Omar, who lives in Saudi Arabia with another wife.

“I have never been unfaithful to any of my husbands,” says five-times married Jane.

“Lay off my British wife says son of bin Laden,” writes the Mail. Omar is “stunned and outraged” over criticism of Jane. Says Jane: “I am proud Muslim and I never told Omar I had Jewish blood. I was very worried he would divorce me.”

But now she has told him. He has seen all. He knows of her past husbands, including an RAC patrolman and a member of a biker gang called Satan’s Slaves.

Jane Felix-Bowne will be OK. “My father’s business is not my business,” says Omar. “I don’t care if he is the most wanted terrorist in the world. He is my father and I love him.”

While Trisha and other presenters of daytime TV confessionals try to get Omar on the sofa before the baying crowd (“He wants shootin’”; “The apple don’t fall far from the tree”; “Paedo!”) , we see Jane.

She is showing some skin. She has tattoos, including one of a black widow spider.

Osama bin Laden praises the happy martyr…

Posted: 16th, July 2007 | In: Tabloids Comments (2) | TrackBack | Permalink