Farting With Celebrities: Big Brother And The Saturdays
THANKS to Big Brother housemate Coolio, John Prescott and Prince Edward, farting is the new celebrity shocker.
Everyone’s at it, and if they’re not at it, they’re talking about being at it.
In the Daily Sport, The Saturdays are heard talking about their farting. Says Rachel Wiseman, of the band being hailed as “The New Girl’s Aloud:
“A fart is a message to the brain that poo is on the next train.”
Adding:
“If you keep farting and don’t poo for a few days it really wants to get out. It’s talking to you.”
“Phllllwwrrrppppp!” it says. “Fthhhhhhhhwol!” “Phuttt!”
Hard to translate, but Anorak’s resident professor of Fartology assures us that the fart is an inner cry for help and Ms Wiseman should connect with her inner gas if she is to score a spot of Me And My Wind, the new celebrity-recycling show on Five, and/or Channel 4’s 100 Best Emissions.
And the Saturdays should hurry. Farting is a rich source of readymade lyrics:
“He who denied it, supplied it.”
“Smelt it, dealt it.”
“He who made the rhyme, made the crime.”
Simon Cowll looks interested…
Posted: 6th, January 2009 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
