Kerry Katona Goes Snorkelling For Pakistani Orphans In Marbella
KERRY Katona will now tell OK! readers about her fifth child. As the headline states:
“KERRY SPEAKS ONLY TO OK! ABOUT HER FIFTH CHILD”
The Star and its sister organ OK! have tapped into a rich vein of news we call the Maybe Baby. First Katie Price declared she was not pregnant. Then Abbey Clancy declared, via a source, that she might get pregnant one day. And now mum-of-four Kerry Katona wants to tell us about the child she has yet to conceive in anything but her dreams.
This is “HER SHOCKING NEWS”.
We meet Kerry in Marbella, where she’s being squirted by two young children in swimsuits. One is chubby and a bit ginger. The other is blonde and thinner. Chances are their guns are full of vegetable dye (Swede/Carrot No.6 Blend). Kerry is orangey-brown stood on her tip-toes.
So, here’s Kerry stood by a swimming pool being fired at by water pistols and “talking about the thousand of children who have been orphaned in the wake of the floods in Pakistan”. This is sensitive stuff, readers.
Before Kerry heads to a water park and shoots down the Slide Of Terror, she tells us that she is “considering adopting an orphan”.
Says Kerry, with those terrible floods on her mind:
“We went on a Sunseeker and we got pulled along in rubber doughnuts, then we all jumped in the sea and did some snorkelling.”
Anorak will pass on Kerry’s good wishes and snorkelling tips to those Pakistanis who live in fear of drowning.
Tip 1: Get a boat
Tip 2: Breathe
And then one page on is a truly odd picture in which Kerry talks about flirting and spooning a man in bed (surely ladling them? – ed) while stood next to the blonder daughter. Both wear swimsuits and strike the kind of saucy pose that used to illustrate Top of The Pops LPs.
Kerry then tells us that she is “highly sexed” and “would like someone for a good old shag”. Then the girls all jump into a rubber ring…
Room for one more? The orphans of Pakistan await Kerry’s answer…
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THIS PICTURE IS FOR EDITORIAL USE ONLY : Singer Kerry McFadden , of the girl band Atomic Kitten, performing on stage at the Disney Channel Kids Awards 2000, at the London Docklands Arena. * 10/1/2001: McFadden and Atomic Kitten's Kerry Katona are expecting a baby. The baby is due on September 5 the day before Kerry's 21st birthday. The pop star pair secretly got engaged last year but kept the news under wraps until a few weeks ago for fear of upsetting Westlife's millions of young fans. 18/1/2001: Kerry Katona, who is pregnant and will leave girl group Atomic Kitten for the health of her unborn child, her record company said. She is to be replaced by blonde Jenny Frost who was seen earlier this year among a party holidaying with the Duke of York in Thailand. Kerry, 20, is said to be leaving the band early in order to rest from the hectic schedule and prepare for the birth of her baby in September. 06/03/02 The former Atomic Kitten star turned TV presenter beat rivals including Victoria Beckham to the title of Celebrity Mum of the Year. Katona, who is married to Westlife's Bryan McFadden and mother to six-month-old Molly, got more than twice as many votes as Posh Spice in the online poll by toy firm The Blue Foot Bear Company.
Posted: 24th, August 2010 | In: Celebrities Comment | TrackBack | Permalink
