Sports Category
Sports news, commentary and scores with wit and added value. We compare and contrast the best and worst sports reporting in the mainstream press, blogs, TV and online. We love the English Premier League (Arsenal, Liverpool, Spurs, Manchester United and Manchester City) and all things football but we cover cricket, rugby, the Olympics, tennis, golf, F1 and highlights of the sporting year.
Bolton Wanderers Cash In On Gary Cahill – Spurs And Arsenal Finally Get To Laugh
GARY Cahill is playing well for England and Bolton. He says he craves Champions League football. And after he signs forms in January for a free end of season transfer to Arsenal, Spurs, Chelsea or Liverpool, he will get it. But what do his Bolton teammates think of it all?
Well, the Daily Mirror produces the most misleading headline of the week, as it declares:
“Petrov amazed Cahill’s still at Bolton.”
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Cologne Supporters Tell Team: If You Go Down We Will Beat You To Death
DEATH Threat of The Day: Cologne fans graffiti the first team’s training ground with teh words: “If you go down we will beat you to death.”
No pressure. And no rhyme either.
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Manchester City Staffer Wrote Email Worse Than Cancer To Nedum Onuoha’s Mum
DID Manchester City chief executive Garry Cook send an offensive message to the cancer-stricken mother of the team’s Nedum Onuoha? He says no. But Dr Anthonia Onuoha, who also works as her son’s agent, appears unconvinced. She has complained to the FA and Premier League about the e-mail she received. What she expects them to do is a moot point. The Premier League is a massive marketing department and the FA has less teeth than Albert Steptoe’s grandson.
The Sun says City are determined to find the emailer. Indeed, they say they already have.
The story goes that in October 2010 Dr Anthonia wrote to City’s football administrator, Brian Marwood. She said her body was “ravaged with cancer and ongoing chemotherapy” but she was still sharp of mind.
Two weeks later she, reportedly, received this:
“Brian. Ravaged with it!!……I don’t now how you sleep at night. You used to be such a nice man when I worked with you at nike.”
This site says that message was signed “G”.
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Posted: 5th, September 2011 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment (1)
Nastassia Mironchyk-Ivanova’s Pony Tail Costs Her Long Jump Gold
LET us all spare a thought for Nastassia Mironchyk-Ivanova, the long jumper whose long pony tail cost her the top spot at The World Championships in Daegu, South Korea.
When the Belarussian jumped things looked promising. The legs reached out. The arms pointed forwards. Her feet planted into the sand. But her pony tail trailed far behind her. The greater Mironchyk-Ivanova soared an impressive 6.90m – good enough for a gold medal. But her hair only managed 6.74 meter – only good enough for fourth place.
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The Funniest Football Shirt Sponsors Ever – A Photo Gallery
FUNNY shirt sponsors features: Brighton, West Brom, Barnsley, Deportivo, Rochdale, St Johnstone, Clydebank, Oxford, Roma and AC Milan…
The 9th World Belly Boarding Championships In Photos: Hairy Backs And Comfi Slax In Cornwall
HAIRY backs and Comfi Slax massed for the 9th World Belly Boarding Championships 2011, held at Chapel Porth beach, Cornwall, UK. You are about the see the finest collection of British swimwear this side of Carry On Camping…
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Can Arsenal Blame England For Jack Wilshere’s Injury? They’ll Try To
ARSENAL’S teenage tyro Jack Wilshere is injured. He won’t play again until November. Huge sighs of relief all round at the FA, then, because England relented to pressure from Arsene Wenger club and omitted the player from the country’s Under-21 team for last summer’s European Championships in Denmark.
The 19-year-old was fit enough to play for Arsenal in July. But he only lasted seven minutes of Arsenal’s Emirates Cup match with New York Red Bulls.
So. It’s Arsenal’s fault?
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Posted: 4th, September 2011 | In: Sports | Comments (6)
England v Bulgaria: Monkey Chants And Why Lothar Matthaus Knows Racism Is Never A Gas
ENGLAND tonk Bulgaria and the local fans in Sofia engage in racist chanting. The brains trust direct monkey chants at Ashley Young, Ashley Cole and Theo Walcott. It is appalling. Should the team leave the pitch? Nothing seems to stop it. So. What can be done? Incidentally, Bulgaria are managed by Lothar Matthäus, the German great says:
“I cannot say too much about this as I wasn’t really aware of it but, in my capacity as the manager, it’s pitiful for things like this to happen,” he said. “So, as a result of that, I’d like to apologise on behalf of the Bulgarian Football Federation.”
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Posted: 3rd, September 2011 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Jamie Redknapp’s Not In The Least Bit Homoerotic Appreciation Of Fulham’s Bryan Ruiz
JAMIE Redknapp, formerly of Bournemouth, Spurs and Liverpool, takes time out from whispering about package holidays to tell us that Fulham’s new player Byran Ruiz has caught his eye:
Bryan Ruiz is a going to be a player. I watched a lot of him last year for Twente and he really does have the lot; he’s a tall, good-looking boy with the long hair and you can’t help but notice him. More importantly he’s got a lovely left foot, he strikes the ball sweetly and is an elegant footballer, a very nice mover…
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Talking Hairy Balls With Steve Howard, Manchester United’s Wayne Rooney And ‘Dodgy’ Women
MORE insight from the Sun’s man with Sky TV, Steven Howard. Today he’s been looking at Manchester United’s Wayne Rooney:
“It’s amazing what a new barnet can do. It may not be the most prolific sprouting ever seen in the history of hair-weaving but who cares? If it keeps Wayne Rooney happy then we should be as well. No one, in fact, can quite remember him this jolly since those days of uninterrupted joy and youthful bliss prior to Euro 2004.”
Yeah. No-one saw Rooney smiel – such as when he was scoring goals and winning the Champions’ League.
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Robbie Savage Mocks Arsenal, Praises Liverpool And Thinks All Germans Look The Same
ROBBIE Savage never misses a chance to show us how delighted he is with being Robbie Savage. If only the rest of the world would notice what he notices things would be better.
Anyhow the shock jockstrap was on BBC Radio 5Live telling listeners that German giant Per Mertesacker’s cut-priced move to Arsenal was bad business because the player had ben flop at Real MAdrid. Indeed, so bad was the capped German that his name has ben expunged from all record books. It’s like he played in Spain. But Christoph Metzelder did play in Spain. You and Robbie Savage can look it up.
Savage shows typical humility with his Tweet:
“There you go tweeps I’m human !! Lol”
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Posted: 1st, September 2011 | In: Sports | Comments (17)
The Sun’s Steve Howard Tries To Kick Arsenal Manager Arsene Wenger And Misses Horribly
STEVE Howard is the Sun’s football hack who knows more about Arsene Wenger than the Arsenal manager knows about himself…probably. In a piece about transfer dealings, the Sun’s man sat in front of News Now and Teletext, tells his readers:
It’s incredible to see the men brought in by Wenger and those allowed to go since the Invincibles won the title in 2004. The out-tray includes Vieira, Campbell, Edu, Pires, Bergkamp, Gilberto, Cole, Lauren, Ljungberg, Henry, Diarra, Flamini, Toure, Adebayor, Hleb, Lehmann, Gallas, Clichy, Fabregas and, Nasri.
The in-tray? Van Persie, Song, Diaby, Rosicky, Senderos, Walcott, Silvestre, Almunia, Sagna, Julio Baptista, Eduardo, Fabianski, Arshavin, Vermaelen, Bendtner, Koscielny, Squillaci, Chamakh, Gervinho, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Jenkinson plus the three latest
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Posted: 31st, August 2011 | In: Sports | Comments (5)
Arsenal Sign Gary Cahill? Phil Gartside’s ‘F*ck Off’ Earns Bolton £8million More
ARSENAL offer a rpeorted £6million for Gary Cahill. Bolton Wanderers chairman Phil Gartside tells them to “fuck off“.
Arsenal offer £10million plus £4million in bonuses and add-ons.
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Posted: 31st, August 2011 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Spurs Sell Peter Crouch For £39m
PETER Crouch is leaving Spurs for… Well, who? And how much?
“Sunderland will today try to seal an £8m deal for striker Peter Crouch” –The Daily Star.
‘Crouch, 30, is the subject of a £9m bid from the Potters” – Goal.com
“Stoke boss Tony Pulis is throwing a fortune at Tottenham striker Peter Crouch to persuade him to move north. Pulis agreed a £10million fee with Spurs…” – The Daily Mirror
“Peter Crouch is at the centre of a £12million tug of war between Sunderland and Stoke” – The Sun
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Posted: 31st, August 2011 | In: Sports | Comments (2)
Arsenal’s South Korean Striker Park Chu-Young Is A 6ft-Tall Midget
ARSENAL have swooped for Park Chu-Young. Park is the captain of South Korea – and Arsenal fans must be hoping that he makes better fist of leading and inspiring the team than those other international captains in the club’s ranks, such as the barely-bothered Andrei Asharvin and the ineffectual Tomas Rosicky.
But what else to we know about Young? Well, he will give Arsenal fans something to sing about (“Park, Park, where ever you may be, you eat dogs in your country…“). He will, in all likelihood, leave the Gunners to do a stint of national service or play for a police tem in 2014 or 2015. But for the inside line on the player’s tactical know-how and skills we turn to the Daily Star’s Brian Woolnough
“A little striker from South Korea is not the answer.”
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Posted: 30th, August 2011 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
The Greatest Football Injury And Foul Ever – A Thing Of Wonder
LADIES and gentleman, footballers do not always dive and then – and Anorak wants you to look out for this – place a hand on their heads and check it for signs of blood. Sometime they get hurt.
In this gif, the injured soccer player is rolling about on the floor is in effort to extinguish the fire of pain.
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Posted: 30th, August 2011 | In: Sports | Comment (1)
Manchester United’s Luis Nani Become Luis Nazi As Tony Cascarino Says Arsenal Are ‘Having A Holocaust’
TONY Cascarino says that Arsenal left back Armand Traore is “having a Holocaust” against Manchester United. This would make Luis Nani more Luis Nazi. While some delight in taking offence at Cascarino’s words (and this is a man who helped write the best footballer’s autobiography Anorak has read – Full Time: the Secret Life of Tony Cascarino is a cracking read) Anorak just enjoys the phrase.
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Posted: 28th, August 2011 | In: Sports | Comments (3)
Arsenal Score Against Manchester United – Faith In Wenger Not Misguided: Photos Of Debt Beating Prudence
ARSENAL went to Manchester United today boasting a team with slightly less experience than a novice nun on a Stag weekend in Amsterdam. Gunners fans held aloft a benner whish declared:
“IN ARSENE WE TRUST”
United fans unfurled their own banner:
“Glazer Glazer What’s The Score Clear All The Debt In Singapore”
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Posted: 28th, August 2011 | In: Sports | Comments (2)
The Timash Arena Photos: Bursaspor’s Stadium Is A Massive Green Crocodile With Laser Eyes
IN Bursa, Turkey, Bursaspor football club are to move to a new 45,000-seat stadium with a massive crocodile on the roof. The croc’s two eyeholes each feature a beam of lights firing into the skies.
The Timsah Arena is designed by Sozuneri Architects. It’s inspired by the club’s nickname: the Green Crocodiles. Anorak wonders if other stadia will follow?
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Harry Redknapp Says Samir Nasri Went To Manchester City For The Cash: Pope still Catholic
SAMIR Nasri is seeking to explain why he left Arsenal and rejected their offers of £90,000-a-week – for 185,00-a-week at Manchester City:
“[Man City] have the biggest squad and they showed it last year when they won the FA Cup and finished in front of Arsenal. So, the facts talk for Man City. I hope to win titles. I played at a high level with Arsenal but I never won anything.”
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Bolton Tell Arsenal To F*ck Off: Gary Cahill Should Make A Note Of The Words
DID Arsenal really offer £6million for Bolton Wanderer’s defender Gary Cahill. Bolton mangers calls the offer “not even close to derisory“.
Bolton chairman Phil Gartside retweets a message for Arsenal to “fuck off”.
Given the facts that £6million is lots of money – at least to a journalist – and that Cahill is in the final year of his contract and can at its end leave on a free transfer, Gartside shows just how far removed from reality football is.
For his part, Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger says:
“That number is completely wrong. If Gartside can say I am lying I am ready to confront him.. You can believe Gartside or you can believe me. It’s not right. It’s not the truth. The truth is that we never speak about our negotiations. If a club doesn’t want to sell a player it can keep him. When we sign a player we come out here and tell you and keep the price a secret. If you ask do I want to buy your house and you are not happy with the price you say no, that’s it. Why should you feel insulted? I don’t understand. If the player is not for sale they can keep him. I don’t understand the problem. If we want to buy the player we buy the player. I do not have to explain for how much.”
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Celtic Star Joe Ledley Is A Massive Hit In Thailand: Video
JOE Ledley is big in Thai schools. The footballer is a hero to the nation’s Glasgow Celtic fans.
You might not like British football, but it the nation’s leading cultural export. (Anorak enjoys little more than seeing foreign rebels and fighters wearing replica football shirts of Chelsea, Arsenal, Manchester United and more. It might just that Wayne Rooney will secure world peace…)
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Posted: 25th, August 2011 | In: Sports | Comments (9)
Joey Barton From Newcastle To QPR Is A No Brainer
JOEY Barton is heading to London to play for Queens Park Rangers. He’s an honest kind of guy. Here’s Joey earlier this year:
“As far as I’m concerned, unless someone comes in and can offer me the opportunity to play at the next level, which is obviously the Champions League, then for me it’s a no-brainer. I won’t be leaving the football club and I’m looking forward to going back pre-season.”
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When Samir Nasri Met Gary Cook Things Turned Ugly
SAMIR Nasri is at Manchester City. He’s in the stadium meeting another former Arsenal player on City’s book (there are now six – four current players and scouting Brian Marwood), Patrick Vieira. He then meets Gary Cook, City’s CEO. Cook is 53 years young. He shakes Nasri’s hand, as a gentleman might, and then does a kjnd of twist and palms the Frenchman. Is this an attempt to cement a relationship that is not just about money and business?
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Arsenal Beat Udinese Photos – But Gareth Southgate Gave Us This Highlight
ARSENAL march on in the Champions’ League and prove that coming fourth in the Premier League year after year can be more exciting than coming fifth, or even third. The highlights of the match were the goals and the saves, natch., and this exchange between Matt Smith, of ITV, and Gareth Southgate of the pundit classes:
Matt Smith: “So Rosicky’s coming on for Arsenal – injury or tactical change?”
Gareth Southgate: “Possibly.”
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