Royal Wedding Totty Watch: Kitty Spencer Gets Her Babs Out
THE Royal wedding is over. Did William and Catherine really marry? Anorak had planned to avoid the wedding by way of a super-injunction against the entire planet. But the lawyers filed the application too late and the show was broadcast on the BBC.
Anorak has yet to see the long form marriage certificate, but the photos and Katie Price’s declaration that she should now be known as Catherine Price are proof enough. And then there is the totty.
Thoughtfully, the royal ushers sat the blonde weaves together. Lady Kitty Eleanor Spencer, Lady Eliza Victoria Spencer and Lady (Katya) Amelia Spencer have been styled by aunty Babs Windsor’s House of EastEnders. Anorak waited for the dum-dum drum roll and cut-away shot of Sarah Ferguson peeping through the net curtains in a Hackney squat. She jangles the keys to her slightly used and battered white Fiat Uno, a gift from a mysterious CPB.
Other shaggables to look out for: Mrs Nick Clegg (in shiny hanky chic); David Beckham (and tick); Prince Harry Baseball Cap (wondering if he should shag Pippa and if it’s too late to cop a feel of Kate); Pippa Middleton (d’lish – Fergie should pimp her out); Chelsy Davy (is she related to Britney Spears? An Oompah loompah? Does she do natural sunlight?); Eugenie Windsor (Oliver Twist’s Nancy meets Mae West); Carole Middleton (MILF); a woman in the crowd opening her shirt; Natalie Portman look-alike Princess Letizia; and Sam Cam…