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Anorak | The Royal Family are all Diana’s children on the Diamond Jubilee show

The Royal Family are all Diana’s children on the Diamond Jubilee show

by | 27th, May 2012

HAVE you seen the massive Diamond Jubilee tribute to the Royal Family hanging from Sea Containers House in London? It is the largest ever photograph of the Royal Family, measuring 100m by 70m and weighing nearly two tons. Odd, indeed, that photo that large can find no space for Prince William and Harry, or their dear old mum, Lady Diana.

So desperate are the Windsors to pretend to be like the rest of us the surprise is that the advert fails to feature them modelling a signature range of Diamond Jubilee underwear. It’s not hard to image Andrew spending 98% of his life with just his knickers on and Prince Eddie dressed in pleated pyjamas for almost all of his. Anne, of course, doesn’t wear underwear, having been hand sewn into her tweed all-in-one in 1972. Prince Charles doesn’t know what colour his undies are because they pulled onto this loins by a willing footman while it’s still dark.

You might have caught Andrew speaking to an obsequious Alan Titchmarsh on the telly. Andy, in full imbecilic mode, revealed about his upbringing:

“‘Mummy’ was probably the way that we would refer to her, but if we were particularly wanting something then we might be more respectful, saying ‘Your Majesty’. I’m sure it’s the same in your family, if you want something you will change your tone.”

Don’t be so sure, Andrew, who in that PR-driven quest to be just like us says that parenting in palace was split “50/50” between the Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh the other 99% of the time, it was up to teachers, nannies and the military. Andrew was never much cop at sums. He adds:

“We would usually see her in the afternoons and evenings, the usual sort of bath-time routine. Then Father would usually read us a story or we would read to him. We would read the Just So Stories.”

And they do love things Just So. Thoughts turn to greenie Prince Charles, who when he’s not shagging another man’s wife a fellow officer in mummy’s army and flying by jet to talk about the environment,

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Posted: 27th, May 2012 | In: Key Posts, Royal Family Comments (3) | Follow the Comments on our RSS feed: RSS 2.0 | TrackBack | Permalink