Operation Yewtree: they only nick the ugly ones
IT’S been a while since the last
There have been nine arrests so far. Enough for a game of Celebrity Squares, the 1970s noughts and crosses gameshow with a twist. There should be further arrests – the Star promised more on January 13, stating: “Savile cops will arrest seven more stars” – but many VIPS (as they were known in their pomp) are dead. Also, if the Star can make celebrities of X Factor also-rans and minor soap opera actors, the Celebrity Police Force might not think it worth the effort to nick a Crossroads extra. We could dig up some real stars gone by, but then we’d be necrophiliacs, like Jimmy Savile.
The most recent arrest was that of Jim Davidson, who was nick-nicked by the Celebrity Police Force at Heathrow Airport. He wasn’t fleeing the country. He was flying back from a holiday. He was on his way to compete with the aforesaid Z-listers on Channel 5′s Celebrity Big Brother. Davidson was going to be locked in a house in Elstree and ritually abused. The Celebrity Police Force missed the chance to arrest him as he was evicted or, better yet, crowned CBB champ. Pity the CPF copper forced to tell his unimpressed kids that Davidson was a big cheese in the 1980s. Nicking the CBB champ would have been waaaay cooler, dad. Maybe the CPF can make amends by waiting until the cameras are rolling before they tell an England footballer his house has been burgled, or a friend has committed suicide?
What they did to Davidson was cruel and pathetic. Did someone in a room at Scotland Yard look at the new rules and mores on racism and hate speech and decide that if we are going to punish people for sins of the past, Davidson, of the Chalky gags, would be a media-friendly target? Look how modern the police are, they’ve nicked an old-style, right-wing comedian.
Rolling Stone’s teenager-fancier Bill Wyman’s not been asked to help the police with their enquiries. Neither has Jimmy Page. In fact, no-one deemed shaggable by today’s standards has. Gary Glitter? Freddie Starr? How could anyone have ever fancied them, let alone had consensual sex with them? Why is it that no-one attractive or cool has been arrested? Might it be that any under-age groupies they shagged are not entirely unhappy with the memory?
This is, of course, a criminal case. Victims should get justice. It’s also about the elite rebranding their new image. The police knew about Jimmy Savile years ago. The police knew about abuse in Rochdale. Cyril Smith, the former Labour member who became a LibDem MP, was on the police’s radar. Complaints had been but not followed up in any meaningful way. But that was then. Look at today’s go-ahead coppers. Look at them confronting history.
One question: how are the authorities getting along with the present? Is no-one famous having sex with a starstruck fan? Probably not. After all, where once racism was “institutionalised” in the police service, you can now get nicked for causing offence with a tweet…