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Posts Tagged ‘clowns’

Naked woman in clown make-up terrifies drivers

More Halloween oneupmanship as we read of 37-year-old Candice Kreidel. She’s been arrested for partially dressing up as a clown – she was mostly naked – and chasing cars.

Wearing clown make-up, a stocking cap and “either partially or completely nude”, Kreidel was seen running up and down a road in Clarksville, Tennessee. Police says she appeared to be chasing cars and jumping in front of other vehicles.


naked clown


The local newspaper reports:

While officers were headed to the location, there were four calls to 911 from a woman who berated, threatened, and cursed the dispatchers. Police determined these calls came from the suspect’s phone. When police arrived at her home, they found her in a sports bra, pyjama pants, and a stocking cap. Police said her face and body were covered in what could be described as clown make-up.

Kreidel, admitted to making the phone calls and running about in the road.

It;s an odd story. you’d think a driver might stop and help the naked woman stood in the street. Give her the right amount of make-up and what chivalrous man would not offer his assistance. Over-do the pancake and men forget their urges, slam their foot to the floor and make for the hills at speed.



Posted: 30th, October 2016 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Killer Clown hysteria reaches Watford – and its got a butter knife

Have you seen killer clowns? The Watford Observer reports that a “knife-wielding clown has been spotted near a children’s playground in Watford at 3:30pm.” Cheryl Warby says her children spotted a clown holding a butter knife.

There’s a fashion for pranksters (Times) to dress as clowns costumes to chase, threaten or stare at strangers. It is the “clownpocalypse”.


killer clown

“Grandma’s here!”


She Mrs Warby:

“My daughter and two friends were riding their bikes up the Harebreaks towards the adventure playground when a black car fiesta or coarsa [sic] shaped stopped on the roundabout and beeped at them. When they looked they saw a clown face and the person was holding a butter knife he said to the girls ‘I’m a clown with a knife’.

Did the kids have phones to take a snap of the car’s numberplate? Don’t all children have mobiles phone now and dashcam-style devices implanted into their foreheads?

“At this point the girls screamed and rode to the adventure playground where they new they could get help which is when 101 was phoned and it was reported to the police who said they would keep a look out.

“All three girls are scared to go out now.”

Sergeant Steve Alison from the Watford Safer Neighbourhood Team tells us:  “Although the people dressing up as clowns may think they are taking part in some harmless fun, they should be mindful of the impact their actions may have on others and be aware that any behaviour that causes another person alarm or distress could lead to them being arrested under the Public Order Act 1986.”

A readers asks: “Can you stab a human being with butter knife?”

Another replies: “Only if they’re at room temperature.”

How about we round up all known clowns and set them on these idiots?

West Briton has news of Cornwall’s “only professional clown” David Rotheram. He said:

“The stories about scary clowns are having a knock on effect – especially for me because as far as I’m aware I am the only professional clown in Cornwall. Ever since scary clowns have been trending on Facebook I’ve noticed a drop in interest.

“Normally I get an inquiry on Facebook everyday but things have gotten seriously quiet. I understand clowning is different and people often have varied opinions – there is definitely a stigma attached but most professional clowns love what they do.

“If the quiet spell continues I will look into re-branding myself and instead of ‘Coz The Clown’ I will just be ‘Coz’ in an attempt to step away from the stigma.”


 “I am concerned that if I finish a show and go to the supermarket I will be attacked.”

Randy Christensen, president of the World Clown Association, defends the right kind of clowning:

“If somebody dresses like a doctor and is in a doctor’s smock and is wearing a stethoscope and is in a haunted house and comes at you with a chainsaw, he is not really a doctor.

“Whoever is doing this crazy stuff is not a clown. This is somebody that is trying to use a good, clean wholesome art form and then distort it, trying to gain access to a child. This is not clowning. This person is not a clown.”

Author Stephen King, who gave us the terrifying Pennywise in the novel It, adds:

“Hey, guys, time to cool the clown hysteria — most of em are good, cheer up the kiddies, make people laugh.”

The clown craze has arrived in the UK from the US:

“They say the clowns live deep in the woods, near a house by a pond – At the edge of dark, dark woods in South Carolina, children have been telling adults that a group of clowns have been trying to lure them into the cluster of trees…”

Terrifying stuff. Meanwhile, it’s Halloween at the end of the month when lots of charming little ‘uns knock in disguise on your door and demand goods with menaces, “Trick or treat?” If you do answer the door, take care to put your wig on straight, go easy on the lipstick and remove your surgical boots.

They say the Killer Clown lives at 13 Acacia Avenue – and mums and dads are on their way over with torches and clubs.


Posted: 11th, October 2016 | In: Reviews | Comment

Clowns arrested for crouching in woodland

To Kentucky, where Jonathan Martin, 20, has been arrested and charged with wearing a mask in a public place and disorderly conduct. Martin’s crime was to dress up as a clown. Police found him at 1:00am dressed in “full clown costume” crouching among trees.


clown arrested


The local news says, “Recent reports of clowns trying to lure children into woods have sparked alarm.”

On a list of things likely to seduce a child, dressing up as scary clown is one below a plate of raw broccoli.


clown arrested

“Dressing as a clown and driving, walking or standing in public can create a dangerous situation for you and others,” says Kentucky, police.  “While dressing up is not, in and of itself against the law, doing so in public and thereby creating an unnecessary sense of alarm is illegal.”


YouTube link.

Posted: 25th, September 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment

‘Gifted’ Bedfordshire Council Removes Circus Posters After Woman Complains They Make Her Too Scared To Walk



“WE take complaints on a case by case basis but this was a short-term, easily solvable problem,” says Leighton Buzzard Council’s Senior operations officer Lisa Jarvis. “The circus is on the park which is our responsibility and we are responsible to our residents, so something like that is in our gift to fix, so we fixed it.”

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Posted: 20th, October 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Handyman clowns terrorise Northampton – who are they? (photos)

Northampton clowns


WHO are the teenagers “spotted acting suspiciously in Northampton“? A local woman contacted police on Thursday after two clowns arrived at her home offering to paint her window sills. She says they has no painting equipment with them. (Clue: check flower spray gun.)

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Posted: 16th, September 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Wash your hands kids or else the UNICEF clown will get you

WHAT did you do on Global Handwashing Day in Uzbekistan? In 2012, those hygiene thinking Uzbeks employed a clown to remind the kinder that failure to wash their hands would result in a hiding they would never forget. Either that or else Botchulism Bonzo is reading palms, explaining to this child that he has a very short life line and gripping your wrist leads to godless behaviours…

wash your hands

Spotter:  HIAControversies blog, Boing Boing

Posted: 27th, July 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment

In the 1950s Heinz thought clowns would make pickles fun – they didn’t (photos)

IN the 1950s, Heinz looked at pickles and wondered what went with them? The answer was simple: clowns. Middle-aged men in small hats and lots of make-up would make tummies rumble for jarred pickles. Look out for the clown with a face so stitched in the upwards grin that when eyeing his puke-encrusted sausage, he still smiles broadly. Unless he is, like Bom Bom, actually turned on by such things. But, then, Bom Bom’s a wanted man who only took to clowning because he had a tube of congealed pig’s blood, chronic anaemia and a chronic need for an alibi:


Posted: 9th, February 2013 | In: Flashback, The Consumer | Comment

Record Breaking Woman Cures Alcoholism With 2053 Clowns

KNOCK. Knock. Knock. Trick or treat? The door to Orty Kastaun’s home opens. The little horrors peer in. Orty smiles. “You like the clowns? They like you…”

You see, 61-year-old German Orty holds the Guinness World Record for owning the world’s largest collection of clowns – 2,053 clown-related items, since you’re asking.

Don’t panic, kids. Orty is a recovering alcoholic and the clowns are part of her therapy. Clowns know best. Clowns know everything? They know what you are thinking…

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Posted: 29th, October 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Killer Clowns On Loose In El Salvador: Unregistered Ones

IN El Salvador, beware the imposter clowns. The imposter clowns kill. You’ll die laughing:

About 100 professional clowns who make money by performing on public buses marched through the Salvadoran capital Thursday to protest the killing of a passenger by two imposter clowns …

“We are protesting so that people know we are not killers,” said professional clown Ana Noelia Ramirez. “The people who did this are not clowns. They unfortunately used our costume and our makeup to commit a monstrous act.”

The War On Clowns, PC Konk And Other Big Shoe Wearers

The protesters – wearing oversized bow ties, tiny hats and big yellow pants – marched down San Salvador’s main street in an effort to both entertain and educate passersby. Several held signs insisting that real clowns are not criminals.

Clown-union leader Carlos Vasquez says he plans to issue IDs to all real clowns and urge police to detain those who do not have them.

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Posted: 15th, June 2010 | In: Strange But True | Comment