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In Pictures: Tiger Woods’ Text Messages To Jaimee Grubbs

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In Pictures: Tiger Woods’ Text Messages To Jaimee Grubbs

tiger-woods-elinTIGER Woods: So sorry is Jaimee Grubbs for hurting Elin Nordegren that she hold’s her phone to the air and let’s everyone see the sexy texts Elin’s husband sent her. Touching stuff. And it is informative. What do you say to a billionaire golfer? What does a billionaire golfer say to Las Vegas waitress? Let’s see in Anorak’s GCSE Guide To Sexting The Woods:

Module 1: Adressing The Woods

Jaimee: I drove out for the night to surprise a friend with a friend with a present for there birthday
Tiger: what kind of present your naked body

Teacher’s Note: In this message Jaimee mistakes “there” for “their”. Tiger also manages to imply that Jaimee sleeps around.

Conclusion: Good spelling need not be a barrier to having sex with golfers.

Module 2: Man Of Letters

Tiger: quiet and secretively we will always be together
Tiger: when was the last time you got laid

Teacher’s Note: Poetry and poignancy. If Tiger wasn’t a golfer he’d make a great vicar, offering thoughts for the day.

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Posted: 10th, December 2009 | In: Key Posts, Sports | Comment