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Posts Tagged ‘jay leno’

Selena Gomez Gets A ‘Being Brave’ Sticker In Children’s Hospital: Bieber Fans Pray For Her Death

DID you hear about Selena Gomez being rushed to hospital suffering from feeling pukous and having a eye-melting headache? Are you a demented Bieber fan who has been sending death-threats, cheering that she might die and that, in fact, your little voodoo doll actually worked?

Good for you. You must be thrilled, despite the fact Bieber still won’t ever take his miniature arousal anywhere near you because you’d inevitably kill his lust by constantly screaming at him.

Anyway, Gomez, has been getting lots of medical attention and it is thought that she has a combination of food poisoning and exhaustion. Everyone is looking at Beliebers as potential poisoners.

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Posted: 13th, June 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)


Before The Sarah Silverman Sex Tape, A Look At David Letterman’s Extortion

russell-brand-david-letterman2DAVID Letterman has moved on from fantasizing about Sarah Palin’s underage daughter being raped to a story of his alleged dalliances with members of his staff. Says our man in LA:

First Conan O’Brien winds up hospitalized with a concussion after hitting his head during a silly stunt on his show, then comes word that someone’s about to release a sex tape that Jimmy Kimmel made with Sarah Silverman, and now David Letterman says his sexual affairs with members of his staff led to an extortion attempt. Not a good week for the white guys of late night television.

We’d guess Jay Leno is sitting pretty right about now.

Posted: 2nd, October 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment


David Hasselhoff, Jay Leno And Elle McPherson Launch Jaguar XJ

david-hasselhoff-at-the-launch-of-the-new-jaguar-xj-at-the-saatchi-gallery-in-london1ANORAK’S man in leatherette gloves and smelling of bottled pine has been to the launch of the new Jaguar XJ, along with his good pals David Hasselhoff, Jay Leno and Elle McPherson.

Before the gallery, Anorak reveals the contents of Elle’s voicemails, as monitored by our undercover Pernod Journo:

“Get me noticed, you *******”

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Posted: 10th, July 2009 | In: Technology | Comments (3)


Jay Leno Poses For Susan Boyle Album

SUSAN Boyle Watch: Anorak’s looks at Britain’s Got Talent agonist Susan Boyle in the news, with Jay Leno as Susan Boyle…

Susan Bolye is now on every US TV host’s to do list. So far Susan Boyle has been patronised by Anderson Cooper, Larry King and will very soon be touched by Oprah Winfrey.

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Posted: 18th, April 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Learning To Laugh at Obama

JAY Leno on The Tonight Show is going spazmo for Obama jokes:

PRESIDENT Obama said this week that things will get worse before they get better. That’s something you never hear before the election. “Let me tell you, if I’m elected it’s going to get a lot worse.” (He) has announced a taskforce to review the tax codes.

He’s concerned there are too many loopholes and too many people manipulating the system to avoid paying taxes. And that’s just in his administration.

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Posted: 31st, March 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)


Russell Crowe Cures The Credit Crunch

“I WAS thinking,” Russell Crowe tells US TV host Jay Leno:

The New Zealand-born actor announced, during a US TV talkshow appearance, a plan to cure America’s financial crisis … Crowe believes the US Government should give each American $US1 million.

His reasoning was that the US has a population of about 300 million, and a $US300 million outlay was a fraction of the $US700 billion financial bailout package rejected by politicians in Washington DC yesterday.

He should have thought a little harder though—a $US1 million handout to 300 million people would cost $300 trillion.

Genius…

Posted: 1st, October 2008 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comments (24)