Anorak News | Al Gore, The Death Of Mr Toilet And Toilet Paper Poems

Al Gore, The Death Of Mr Toilet And Toilet Paper Poems

by | 29th, January 2009

GLOBAL warming is all around us.

Thanks to global warming, snow flakes are now becoming more alike. Fact!

The ruddy faces of Mother Nature’s condition – Al Gore and John Kerry – are in Washington:

“The Science is screaming at us,” said Kerry, who, like Gore is a former Democratic Presidential candidate. Kerry also has his own tome on the threat of global warming.

“To the naysayers and the deniers out there, let me make it clear the little snow in Washington does nothing to diminish the reality of the crisis that we face,” Kerry said.

As Tim Blair says:

Note that “Science” is now a proper noun. Like “Jesus”.

And “Toilet”.

Poetry in the loo can cut down on paper use too, says a Japanese group campaigning to save toilet paper as part of the country’s battle against global warming.

Simply pasting a “toilet poem” at the eye level of a person seated in the cubicle can help cut toilet paper use by up to 20 percent, a study by the research center Japan Toilet Labo showed.

Can Ode To Nature be written in organic matter?

“That paper will meet you only for a moment,” reads one poem. “Fold the paper over and over and over again,” says another. Or just: “Love the toilet.”

Does hugging the toilet count as love? What about – you know – sitting on its face?

No paper?!

A mistrial was declared Monday when a home-invasion robbery suspect smeared human feces on his attorney’s face then threw more at the jury.

Meanwhile, we bring grim news:

A South Korean who built a toilet-shaped home to publicise his drive to improve worldwide sanitation died on Wednesday aged 69, officials of his organisation said.

Sim Jae-Duck was pronounced dead in a Seoul hospital after being moved from what is billed as the world’s only toilet house in his native city of Suweon south of the capital.

“He had been suffering from prostate cancer since he began a campaign to launch his World Toilet Association in 2007,” association spokesperson Shon Seong-Jin said…

Sim was born in a restroom – in line with then-traditional beliefs that this would bring good luck – and once said he planned to die in the $1,6-million toilet house he designed.

The 419-square-metre concrete and glass structure was named Haewoojae meaning “a place of sanctuary where one can solve one’s worries.”

If the deceased is to be flushed or buried is unsaid. did he leave behind a note, or a little present in the bowl. And we have yet to learn how many toilets Mr Gore keeps readied in his mansion…

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Posted: 29th, January 2009 | In: Politicians Comment (1) | TrackBack | Permalink