Anorak News | Old Mr Anorak’s Book Club: Ralph Nader’s Only The Rich Can Save Us

Old Mr Anorak’s Book Club: Ralph Nader’s Only The Rich Can Save Us

by | 2nd, October 2009

naderRALPH Nader’s has written a book. It’s called Only The Rich Can Save Us. It’s the book what he wrote. Paco notes:

Experiencing a colossal brain fart that no doubt left him with cerebral diverticulitis, Ralph Nader has written a 700-page “novel”, which is likely to trigger a flurry of orders from Borders and Barnes & Noble for steel-reinforced remainder tables.

Masochist Rob Long has read the book so that we don’t have to. Of course, if you think you’d enjoy watching Nader’s geeky, school-boy wet dream of socialist billionaire-worship unfold on the printed page, then this epic is just what you’ve been waiting for. Order now from – while supplies last!

Mr Rob Long, everyone:

Here’s the bad news: Ralph Nader has written a novel. Here’s the good news: There’s no sex in it. Wait. That’s not strictly true. At the end of its 700 pages, one of the characters hooks up with Yoko Ono.

Go on:

In Mr. Nader’s tale, billionaire investor Warren Buffett is so dismayed by the ineffectual and chaotic government reaction to Hurricane Katrina that he hatches a plan to “redirect” American society. He summons a brace of moguls—Ted Turner, Barry Diller, Ross Perot and George Soros, among others—to a secret Maui location, along with such celebrities as Bill Cosby, Yoko Ono and Warren Beatty. As they confer together, they find that they all—surprise! —agree that Something Must Be Done.

Fair’s fair, Rob Long – “Something must be done” is an improvement on the current political cry of “Join the debate”.

Here, for instance, is an actual passage from “Only the Super-Rich Can Save Us!”: “As promised, Ted Turner and Phil Donahue had put their heads together to brainstorm about a mascot for the group’s efforts. Ted’s thoughts naturally ran along avian lines, and it wasn’t long before they hit on the idea of a parrot. . . . Patriotic Polly hit the airwaves in fifteen-second spots shown on thousands of stations, and it was an immediate smash.”

Ok, it’s terrible, but not memorably terrible. If Ralph Nader – aka Ralph Nadir – wants inspiration for a sequel – Only The Really Rich (Or Poor!) Can Afford The Time To Read This Book – he should call Martine McCutcheon.

It was a dark and stormy recession…

Posted: 2nd, October 2009 | In: Politicians Comment | TrackBack | Permalink