Sports Category
Sports news, commentary and scores with wit and added value. We compare and contrast the best and worst sports reporting in the mainstream press, blogs, TV and online. We love the English Premier League (Arsenal, Liverpool, Spurs, Manchester United and Manchester City) and all things football but we cover cricket, rugby, the Olympics, tennis, golf, F1 and highlights of the sporting year.
World Cup Balls: England Fan Bites Ear Off England Fan In Brazil (Photos)
POLICE have confirmed that an England fan had a portion of his ear bitten off by another England fan after the Uruguay match in São Paulo.
Crazy..! @hendopolis: SUNDAY PEOPLE: Barbaric #tomorrowspaperstoday #bbcpapers pic.twitter.com/8MLNT9mkdu
— Raza Deportiva (@razaespn) June 28, 2014
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Luis Suarez Balls: Liverpool Striker Prompts Uruguay Fans To Eat Brazilian Baby (Photos)
HOW have Uruguay fans reacted to Luis Suarez’s biting and subsequent ban? Answer: with love. And humour.
(And England? Well, police have confirmed that an England fan had a portion of his ear bitten off by another England fan during Uruguay match in São Paulo.)
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Liverpool Balls: Luis Suarez Rides A Shark’s Bicycle In Florida
DID you know you have more chance of being bitten by Luis Suarez than have of being bitten by a shark? Given that ther is only one of him and millions of sharks, that is some stat. But it’s true. You do.
Ian Steadman worked out that from 2005 to now, Suarez has appeared in 441 first XI matches for Uruguay’s national team and club side, including Liverpool. That manes around 6,160 players have taken on Luis and his teefs. Suarez has bitten three opponents. So. Footballers have a 1 in 2,000 chance of being munched by football’s greatest entertainer. The odds of a shark killing you whilst you’re swimming in the ocean is 1 in 3.7 million.
But Steadman has never seen Luis swim, nor a shark playing football, so the calculations need calibrating, And we can only wonder what the effects of Suarez mating with a shark would mean for mankind.
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Manchester United Balls: Player Send Out Epic Pop-Out Old Trafford Wedding Invites
FORMER Manchester United midfielder Park Ji Sung has announced plans to marry Kim Min Ji on July 27th with this fabulour invitation. The “Wedding of Dreams’ appears to be based on Old Trafford, the branded Theatre of Dreams.
Should this marriage not work out, Park, who joined QPR from United, can comfort himself in the news that a pop-out Loftus Road is cheaper and if he askes bicely, Harry Redknapp will chuck in a load of brown envelopes (allegedly).
Spotter: Pies
Posted: 28th, June 2014 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United Balls: Luke Shaw Loses £6m And Plays For His Old School
MANCHESTER United Balls: Luke Shaw is the most expensive teenager in football history, having joined Manchester United from Southampton for… Well, how much?
Let’s look at the facts, as reporting by the mainstream media. It’s Trasnfer Balls:
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Posted: 28th, June 2014 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer Balls: Mario Balotelli Plays Joins Manchester United’s Hernandez In Newlook Arsenal Front 5
TRANSFER Balls: A round-up of Mario Balotelli news in the scoop-to-deadline mainstream media:
The Guardian has news:
‘Replaceable’ Mario Balotelli could leave Milan, says agent
Could. Maybe. Any other news?
Striker’s agent says: ‘Mario is sad, desperate’
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World Cup Balls: Paul Merson Forgets England 1984 And Thinks Mexico And Brazil Are Rubbish
WORLD Cup Balls presents the wit of Paul Merson – billed in the Daily Star as “Our top columnist”,. He “shoots from the lip”.
Daily Star columnist Merson said: “This is the lowest of the low for England. It doesn’t get any worse”
England scored one point from three matches at the World Cup Finals. In 1994, England scored no points at the World Cup Finals. Merson was part of the team that failed to make it that far.
“People said we had a tough group because there were three former World Cup winners in it – rubbish.”
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Luis Suarez ‘Don’t Bite Me’: Tom Rosenthal’s Songs For Football’s Biggest Entertainer
PIES has spotted this wonderful tribute tio Liverpool and Uruguay’s highly entertaining Luis Suarez.
Take it away, Tom Rosenthal.
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Posted: 26th, June 2014 | In: Liverpool, Music, Sports | Comment
Face Of The Day: Luis Suarez And The Making Of A Global Signature Move
FACE of the day: When Luis Suarez appeared to bite an Italian, his signature move went global. Cruyff has his turn, Maradona his hand. And Luis has his teeth.
“Do the bite, Luis!” the fans cry. “Do it!”
It’s worth the entrance fee alone.
A woman (name not known) puts her arm in front of an image of Uruguay’s Luis Suarez on an advertising board in Rio de Janeiro.
Transfer Balls: Manchester United Buy Ander Herrera For Less Than They Bought Him For Last Year
TRANSFER Balls: Ander Herrera is finally a Manchester United player. Isn’t he?
On June 24, the Mail stated:
Manchester United will sign Athletic Bilbao midfielder Ander Herrera for £28m TODAY
The Mail would be there to shout ‘FIRST’ and salute it’s own scoop. Only, it was balls.
That same day the Mirror also had news:
Manchester United expect to complete the signing of Ander Herrera within 48 hours.
The Mirror was hedging its bets. And it was also wrong.
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Posted: 26th, June 2014 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment
Liverpool Balls: Reds Erase Luis Suarez From Club Website
SO. How did Lvierpool FC report on the Luis Suarez biting incident at the 2014 World Cup? The club’s website has been repoting on Reds at the World Cup.
Fans can read articles on the Ivory Coast (“Late penalty drama sends Toure home”) and Spain (“Reina makes World Cup debut”).
The story about Uruguay’s match with Italy begins:
“Suarez And Uruguay Complete Comeback’ reads the headline – Luis Suarez completed the 90 minutes as Uruguay booked their place in the last 16 of the World Cup with a hard-fought 1-0 victory over ten-man Italy.”
Something was missing from the match report. And now the enetire report is missing:
But fans can still enoy an earlier story:
Suarez’s gameplan to eliminate Italy
One mouthful at a time…
Read: He’s Not That Kind Of Player: How The Biased English Media Love To Hate Luis Suarez
Liverpool Balls: The Redemption Of ‘Evil’ Luis Suarez
IT looks very much as if Luis Surez bit Italy’s Giorgio Chiellini. As ever, Suarez is fantastically entertaining, giving us all a something to talk about and worth watching. Which ever club he plays for next season will be lucky to have him. He puts bums on seats and sells TV packages.
As Luis mulls over the future, we take time to revisit the words used to annoint Suarez when he was welcomed back into the (swallows sick) ‘football family’ after his respective bans for biting and calling Manchester United’s Patrice Evra a “negrito” over and over and over.
That word is “redemption”, defined as:
1. the action of saving or being saved from sin, error, or evil.
“God’s plans for the redemption of his world”
synonyms: saving, saving/freeing from sin, vindication, absolution – a thing that saves someone from error or evil – “his marginalization from the Hollywood jungle proved to be his redemption”2. the action of regaining or gaining possession of something in exchange for payment, or clearing a debt.
“the peasants found the terms of redemption unattractive”
News was that being very good at football after his bans was a sign that Suarez was touched by God’s love. Never mind that Suarez was a very good footballer before he verbally abused Evra and bit a Serb, the media narrative was that as every Suarez goal hit the net, he was cleansed of past sins. He was good because he was morally on-message.
Football was not about fun and ecsapism. The media had bought into the Government’s balls that footballers were ‘role models’ whose every act was seized upon by a foaming working class. If Luis Suarez gets away with calling Evra a negrito, there’d be a race riot. His hilarious nibbling would lead to cannablism in the playground.
So. The story was of a chastened and fully reformed man. He was now saved. And so were we all.
But let’s not forget that the Liverpool fans never stopped loving him.
Last summer, Brandan Rodgers said Suarez was a player “very much valued at Liverpool”. He was “not for sale at any price”. His predecessor, Kenny Dalglish, told us after the Evra incidenct that “it’s time for all of us to draw a line under what happened…[and] move on”. Dalglish added that the banned Suarez “should never have been out in the first place”.
And on he went:
“We have spoken to Suárez. I know he will shake the hand of Patrice Evra and the other Manchester United players before the game.”
Eyes rolled. The suggestions was that it was Suarez who had been wronged; it was he who could forgive.
Liverpool stood by their best player.
But the buzzword was redemption:
James Ducker, Times, September 25 2013:
Luis Suárez begins redemption
Henry Winter, Telegraph, December 16, 2013:
Liverpool’s controversial No7 Luis Suarez is a picture of humility as he wins the Football Supporters’ Federation Player of the Year award at the Emirates…
Fair play to Luis Suárez. Liverpool’s controversial centre-forward turned up at the Emirates Stadium on Monday night, a No 7 dressed to the nines, arriving early and staying late because he wanted totalk to fans from a variety of clubs who had just voted him the William Hill Football Supporters’ Federation Player of the Year. Suárez must have felt after all the criticism he has received that this was a night of acceptance, of redemption.
Liverpool Daily Post December 18, 2013:
Luis Suarez: Thick skin has helped striker’s Liverpool FC redemption
James Olley, Evening Standard, December 18, 2013:
Is anyone else a little uncomfortable with the speed of Luis Suarez’s apparent redemption? On Monday he was awarded the Football Supporters’ Federation Player of the Year barely 24 hours after captaining Liverpool in their trouncing of Spurs.
There can be no doubting that Suarez is the best player in the Premier League on current form and one of the world’s finest talents. His performance at White Hart Lane was yet another whirlwind of destruction, wreaking hurricane-level damage on vaunted opposition.
But that is not really the point…
Yes it is.
Tim Rich, Indy, March 14, 2014:
If he does complete the transformation from villain to footballer of the year, Luis Suarez’s journey to redemption actually began against Sunderland.
His captain, Steven Gerrard, admitted he had not expected to see him in a Liverpool shirt again in the wake of his 10-match ban for biting Branislav Ivanovic. And yet here he was on Wearside in September, having scored the first of his two goals and then pulling up the club’s black away strip to reveal a T-shirt welcoming his son Benjamin into the world.
Max Mutton, Bleacher Report, April 29:
Luis Suarez Has Redemption at Liverpool with Champions League Qualification
Globe And Mail (reuters), May 5:
Luis Suarez completes redemption with Footballer of the Year award
Redemption completed, then.
Those aren’t bite marks in Chiellini’s shoulder. That was a momento from Saint Luis’ Last Supper.
Transfer Balls: Manchester United Agree To Pay Southampton ‘s Luke Shaw Fee
TRANSFER Balls: A look at Southampton’s Luke Shaw, wanted by Manchester United…
June 24, Daily Express:
Man Utd raise Luke Shaw bid to £34m as new Saints boss fights to keep England star
June 24, Daily Star:
Southampton slap a staggering £40m price-tag on Manchester United target Luke Shaw
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Posted: 25th, June 2014 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment (1)
Transfer Balls: Mario Balotelli Could Play In Defence For Arsenal
TRANSFER Balls: The maisntream media have been linking Mario Balotelli with move to Arsenal. The player hasn’t said a word. Have Arsenal?
Today the Metro says the Gunners have:
Mario Balotelli to Arsenal is pure invention, says Arsene Wenger
News being:
When quizzed over the speculation, Wenger told beIN Sports World Cup show that it was ‘pure invention’.
Invented by..? Well, two days earlier the, er, Metro announced:
Arsene Wenger to meet with Mario Balotelli’s agent to discuss Arsenal transfer
One day later, the Metro had more news:
Arsenal want to sign Mario Balotelli by July 10 to star in Puma kit launch
Adding:
Arsenal want to complete a deal to sign Mario Balotelli from AC Milan before July 10th – so he can feature in their new kit launch.
It’s left to the Mirror to sum up the facts:
Mario Balotelli could return to the Premier League next season
He could. Just as Wenger could pick himself to play up front. Or pick Mario to play in defence.
He could.
More Transfer Balls every day…
This Photo Proves Uruguay And Liverpool Star Luis Suarez Bit Italy’s Giorgio Chiellini
LUIS Suarez is fantastically entertianing.
Like most of you, when we heard that the Liverpool and Uruguay striker had bit an Italian, we thought… fantastic. Suarez really is worth the admission price:
Of course, this being Suarez the truth is battered negrito and blue. Was it teefs to shoulder or shoulder to teefs?
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Posted: 24th, June 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comments (2)
Transfer Balls: Cheated Out Of His Arsenal Move Liverpool Want Luis Suarez To Shun Barcelona
TRANSFER Balls – with the Daily Luis Suarez. Can the news media make exclusives and news from nothing?
ESPN: “Liverpool insist Suarez will stay put”
Sources have told ESPN that Liverpool are not resigned to losing the striker after he told manager Brendan Rodgers at the end of last season that he was committed to the club.
These sources are all unnamed.
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Posted: 24th, June 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comment (1)
Luis Suarez Balls: Twitter Plot To Rape And Kill Liverpool Star’s Wife And Young Daughter
ISN’T Free Speech great. There are no buts. Say what you like.
You can on Twitter. But only if the speakers are telling you stuff you might want to hear;. If you don’t like it, you can call the police. What you say on Twitter can earn you a prison sentence and a police raid. But if the Twitter police don’t like your target (see Emma West should be raped; “Let’s hunt Liam Stacey down”; Josie Cunnigham should be shot) then demanding that people be murdered and making threats to rape children is fine.
Free Speech, it turns out, is only free on Twitter if the illiberal mob agree that their target is fair game and won’t snitch on you.
The censorious police only respond to nasty comments if it fits in with this politically correct agenda.
In response to England’s dire showing at the World Cup, and defeat to the mighty Uruguay, the Twitter brains trust have been mouthing off about what they’d like to do yo Luis Suarez,scorer of the goal that sent England home.
None have been arrested. No paper has led with new of Twitter Trolls making terrible threats.
Might it be that what people say on Twitter is not typical of their every waking thought and moral; that what they belch on social media no more wrong than shouting at pigeons in the precinct?
As Joey Barton noted:
I’ve had loads of death threats! Still here aren’t I. I just laugh my head off when I get them… Surely, if u were gonna kill someone you wouldn’t give them a headups.
Arresting people for what they say on Twitter is not about right and wrong; it’s about making the police and elite look good and moral…
Posted: 23rd, June 2014 | In: Sports, Technology | Comment
Daily Mail Sexism: Maria Sharapova Is Only There To Support The Men
WIMBLEDON is here. And that means the …TWAGS. Who they? They’re the Tennis (players’) Wives And Girlfriends.
The Mail spots a few of the blonder ones. But – hold on – don’t women play tennis, too? And isn’t that Maria Sharapova, this year’s Number 5 seed and a former Wimbledon champion?
I could be wrong, Daily Mail, but I think Maria Sharapova might not just be going to Wimbledon to cheer on her boyf. pic.twitter.com/8MrCt1PXNh
— Primly Stable (@PrimlyStable) June 23, 2014
It seems that even the Mail has limits to its seism, and soon changes the image, but not the caption:
Ban The Washington Redskins Name And You Label All The Team’s Fans As Bigots
Andy Blanch, wears a Native American costume and plays his drum to show support for the Redskins during Miami vs Los Angeles Super Bowl game in Los Angeles, Jan. 14, 1973. (AP Photo)
IS the term Redskins racist? During halftime of Game 2 of the National Basketball Association finals, many sports fans saw this advert. Sponsored by the Yocha Dehe Wintun Nation of Native Americans, the ad aimed to raise “an important discussion of racism.”Last week, the Trademark Trial and Appeal Board ruled that the term “Redskins” was “disparaging” to “a substantial composite” of Native Americans when trademarks were granted between 1967 and 1990. So, is the term Redskin racist? Yes.
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Transfer Balls: Luis Suarez Leaves Children Behind In Liverpool To Play For Barcelona
TRANSFER Balls catches up with Liverpool’s Luis Suarez. By now you’ll be wondering what he’s been up to this summer.
Well, he’s been linking up well with his club captain Stephen Gerrard in Brazil, latching onto a Stevie G. through ball to smash one past Manchester City’s Russ Abbot play-alike Joe Hart. Now read on…
Daily Telegraph, March 4, 2014:
Liverpool striker Luis Suárez vows to stay at Anfield no matter whether club qualifies for Champions League
Liverpool did qualify. So. Luis stays!
Speaking to Uruguayan TV channel Canal 10, the new PFA Player of the Year said: “Don’t worry, nothing is going to happen to me. I’m very happy here and my family is happy here.”
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Posted: 23rd, June 2014 | In: Liverpool, Sports | Comments (2)
Transfer Balls: Paul Pogba Hates Arsenal, Loves Chelsea And Thinks Mourinho Should Be Sacked
TRANSFER Balls salutes the work of the Daily Star which conjures utter balls and turns it into news. This week, the Star announces:
Ex-Manchester United star Paul Pogba wants to join Chelsea
That’s the Manchester United “star” who made seven appearances for United, all as a substitute. So. Having stretched the language, we wonder about the root of the Star’s scoop. Reading on we learn:
JUVENTUS and France midfielder Paul Pogba has revealed that he wants to join Chelsea.
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Look Alike: England’s Joe Hart Keeps Goal Like Russ Abbot
A READER writes:
Watching the England v Uruguay match at the Brazil World Cup, I was struck at how much Joe Hart, the sometime England stopper and anti-dandruff activist, looks like TV funnyman Russ Abbot – and not least of all when trying to keep the ball out of the net.
Are they related?
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Transfer Balls: Arsenal Make Balotelli Captain Of Their All-Star A-Team
TRANSFER Balls highlights the sterling work of the Daily Express’ Ben Jeffersen, who writes:
…Chelsea and Arsenal will join the Red Devils in the race for Gonzalo Higuain… Arsenal eye a plan B if they fail to sign Mario Balotelli.
So. Arsenal’s Plan A is to sign Mario Balotelli and Plan B is to sign Gonzalo Higuain. And let us not forget the Sun’s news that the Argentine already plays for the Gunners:
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