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Large Hadron Collider: New Labour’s Theme Song To Armageddon

by | 7th, September 2008

THE Large Hadron Collider is going to kill us all without mercy nor discrimination (although, fair’s fair, the Swiss get it first). Or not.

The Independent cocks an ear to the big looping hole and hears that the theme tune to Satan’s return and so much death is D:Ream’s paean to miserabilism, Things Can Only Get Better.

The song was famously heard at the 1997 victory party of New Labour at the Royal Festival Hall. Says the Indy:

It is a long way from singing the Labour Party anthem “Things Can Only Get Better” to tangling with the fundamental forces of nature but, for Professor Brian Cox of Manchester University, the opening of the Large Hadron Collider will mark the pinnacle of a scientific career that began with a first class physics degree in the mid 1990s, at the same time as he was appearing on Top of the Pops.

The Indy overlooks Tony Blair’s weather machine, and the disappearance of matter in the form of WMD, and looks at Cox’s remarkable career.

From heralding the arrival of Tony Blair to heralding the arrival of the machine that will kill everyone of us

The boy done good…



Posted: 7th, September 2008 | In: Broadsheets Comments (15) | TrackBack | Permalink