manchester united Category
Manchester United football club news, Manchester United transfers, Premier League
Manchester United balls: Van Gaal embroiled in scandal as Mourinho goes fishing
Manchester United manager Louis van Gaal is tired of hearing that irritating-but-talented Jose Mourinho is to replace him at Old Trafford. Speaking to Dutch television channel RTL7 in the wake of United’s 5-1 Europa League win over Midtjylland on Thursday evening, Van Gaal was asked about the pressure both he and his players are enduring at the moment. His answer was fullsome:
He (Mourinho) has said things a number of times with a lot of words. But he does not have to tell me anything. I find the whole thing ridiculous!
No, I don’t want United to do something either. I don’t even want them to react to things which I read in the media or which are being created.
We, the club and I, are not going to help the media right now by denying things.
I think what is happening is an absolute scandal!
The Mirror thinks the story worthy of its lead page.
The paper notes:
The Mourinho connection riles him. The duo are old friends yet Van Gaal refuses to telephone the former Chelsea boss to nail the rumour that he’s angling for the Old Trafford job.
Angling? But the Mirror said it was already his!
Such are the facts.
Posted: 27th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer balls: Mourinho’s three-year Manchester United contract vanishes
Misleading headline of the day appears in the Daily Express – ‘The World’s Greatest Newspaper”. It declares: “Jose Mourinho agrees three-year deal to become Manchester United manager.”
Does Louis Van Gaal, the current Man United manager, know?
It soon becomes clear that the story is utter balls.
Portuguese newspaper Diario de Noticias claim the 53-year-old has now agreed a three-year deal worth £15.75million to become the next United boss.
The Express offers no link to the source of its scoop. But we take a look over there. Diario’s latest news on Mourinho tells us:
Técnico português diz que “ninguém sabe” se irá para o Manchester United na próxima época
O treinador português José Mourinho disse hoje que está “satisfeito” por estar sem trabalhar, observando que a possibilidade de assumir o comando técnico da equipa de futebol do Manchester United “é a pergunta de um milhão de dólares”.
“Todos os dias surgem notícias diferentes, mas a verdade é que neste momento não tenho trabalho e estou satisfeito por não ter”, disse Mourinho, que foi despedido do Chelsea, perante uma plateia de alunos de uma escola secundária em Singapura.
Questionado por um jovem adepto do Manchester United sobre a possibilidade de treinar os ‘red devils’, o treinador português, de 53 anos, foi enigmático: “Essa é a pergunta de um milhão de dólares, que ninguém conhece a resposta e eu sou o primeiro a não a conhecer.”
Google translate:
Portuguese coach says that “no one knows” it will go to Manchester United next season
The Portuguese coach Jose Mourinho said today he was “pleased” to be out of work, noting that the ability to take the coach of the football team Manchester United “is the question a million dollars.”
“Every day there are different news, but the truth is that at this point do not work and I am glad not to have,” said Mourinho, who was fired from Chelsea, before an audience of students from a secondary school in Singapore.
Asked by a young fan of Manchester United about the possibility of training the ‘red devils’, the Portuguese coach, 53, it was enigmatic: “That’s the question a million dollars, that no one knows the answer and I am the first not to know. “
Such are the facts.
Posted: 26th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment (1)
Transfer balls: Manchester United get money back on Rooney to China rumours
Transfer balls: Shanghai Shenhua have offered to pay Manchester United – get this – £27m for Wayne Rooney. They have also offered the England captain £500,000-a-week in wages for three years to join the China Super League.
The Mirror leads with this news. The paper says the cash would be a remarkable sum for the striker, enabling United to “recoup the fee they paid Everton” for the player.
So will Rooney go to China? We’ve no idea – and neither does the Mirror. Below the paper’s headline – “£100m Roo Bid” – is news that, er, no bid has been made. The Daily Express, however, never got past the headline, and it screams: “Chinese Super League makes stunning £100m bid for Man United captain Wayne Rooney.”
The facts become more confused when the Sun adds, “The Manchester United and England skipper still has over three years left on his contract at Old Trafford.” Not so says the Mirror, which reports, “With two years left on his current deal…the Chinese want to make Rooney the face of their Super League.”
The Mirror tells us “Rooney is the player” the Chinese “covet most”. Really? More than Ronaldo and Messi. Is that true – or is it just what the China Super League PR department toil them?
Such are the facts.
Posted: 19th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer balls: Leroy Sane to Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool and wherever else the SEO machine sends him
Transfer Balls: The Daily Star has conjured a headline to seduce fans of the five biggest Premier League clubs to a non-news story:
Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Man City and Man Utd in epic transfer fight for German whizz
Alex Harris writes:
Mundo Deportivo claim Arsenal, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City and Manchester United are all in the hunt for the Schalke attacking midfielder.
The SEObot that might well be operating Harris won’t bother to follow the link. But we will. Over there we hear from one Oriol Domenech, who says Real Madrid and Barcelona are in for Leroy Sane.
Number of quotes to support his story: nil. Number of facts of any sort in either story: nil.
In other news, the Mail asks today: “Is Leroy Sane really worth £42m?”
Dunno.
But the clickbait-bonkers International Business Times say he isn’t, declaring in a headline: “Barcelona spy on Schalke 04 starlet Leroy Sane in Bundesliga match ahead of £28.8m summer move.”
A summer move – but to where – and for how much?
Posted: 18th, February 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Chelsea, Liverpool, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer balls: Manchester United, Pep and The Metro’s Lewandowski mystery
Transfer balls spots this utter bilge from the Metro: “Verbal agreement clears Man United to sign these two major world stars.” Another teaser names names:
Man Utd transfer news: Thomas Muller and Robert Lewandowski boost due to Pep Guardiola agreement
Muller to United! Haven’t we been there before? Didn’t Muller sign a new deal to stay at his beloved Bayern Munich last summer? Why would Lewandowski join a team in the Europa League? The Metro’s Mark Brus writes:
Manchester United could be majorly boosted in their efforts to sign Thomas Muller and Robert Lewandowski in the summer.
“Could be majorly boosted”… Is that English?
The Bayern Munich attacking midfielder and striker are reportedly among the Red Devils’ main targets for next season, but they face competition from rivals Manchester City.
And Bayern, the club he plays for and loves.
However, the Daily Star says Pep Guardiola has a verbal agreement with Bayern that forbids him from raiding the Bavarian giants when he leaves the Allianz Arena for the Etihad Stadium in the summer.
So…
The news gives United a clear run at the players, if they can find the money to do business.
What spectacular balls.
Posted: 18th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester Untied balls: Rooney out, Van Gaal’s hell, England’s dream
Manchester United’s captain is injured. Wayne Rooney, for it is he, has knee ligament damage. The Sun nails the pun with “PAIN ROO KNEE”. The paper says Rooney will miss “a minimum” of eight Manchester United matches and England games against Germany and Holland.
United manager Louis Van Gaal says Rooney could have come off the field when he felt a twinge in their defeat to Sunderland, but opted to play through the pain. This gives the Mirror its headline: “Too brave for his own good.” Only an England captain could be praised for being injured.
Inside the Mirror, Rooney;s injury is Van Gaal’s “ultimate nightmare”. If it is, the hammer-headed Dutchman must sleep like a baby. In any case, he has five “likely lads” to replace Rooney: Donald Love, Regan Poole, Joe Riley, James Weir and Will Keane are all profiled. Problem is that only Keane is a striker.
The Express says Lingard and Martial will “get the chance to shine” in Rooney’s absence. The paper adds that Van Gaal could recall James Wilson from his loan spell at Brighton.
In the Mail, Ian Ladyman says Rooney’s injury is a mixed blessing for England, who can have him “fit and rested” for Euro 2016. Or, to put it another way, England will have their captain out of shape and not match sharp for Euro 2016.
Time, then, to bring on Harry Kane and Jamie Vardy.
Posted: 18th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer Balls: Manchester United want Aubameyang to partner Bale, Ronaldo and Neymar
Transfer balls: Manchester United are all set to bid a £60m for Borussia Dortmund’s 26-year-old striker Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, says the Daily Mirror. The paper says United will “make him one of the biggest stars in the world”. He’ll be the biggest name in the Europa League – or at least its most expensive player (unless United buy Neymar, Bale etc.).
Man United are desperate to sign a star turn. Executive vice-chairman Ed Woodward hopes to lob loadsa cash at Dortmund and that they’ll bite. United will also offer Aubameyang £200,000-a-week to kiss the badge and “promise to make him a global superstar”.
How? By having him travel the world in the summer in the hope that the Chinese go potty for him?
So flaky are the facts behind the story of Aubameyang to United that the Express can’t agree with itself what United will pay for the player:
But let’s not blame the Press for this nonsense – every day the United PR department links the club with a big name player. Don’t worry, fans, it will all be ok. The only problem the manager will have next season is picking a front two from Ronaldo, Neymar, Bale, Aubameyang, Bale, Pogba and Kane.
Posted: 16th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United: Depay wears lover’s face on his jacket
Manchester United winger Memphis Depay celebrated his love for Lori Harvey by airbrushing an image of her face the back of a bespoke bomber jacket.
Not creepy. Not creepy at all:
Posted: 15th, February 2016 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United balls: Van Gall on monthly rolling contract as Jose joins for ‘free’
Manchester United are to sign Jose Mourinho before February is out. So says the Sun. But hold on a moment. Reading on the Sun says United “could” sign Jose. They could also win the Premier League, play Wayne Rooney in goal and pack it up, deciding that football is a mug’s game. It’s all a question of likelihood.
The Sun’s Neil Curtis says United’s board “believe” they have nothing to lose in sacking Louis Van Gaal and getting Jose in sooner rather than later. Curtis says Mourinho could be in place by the time United play Arsenal on February 28.
The other reason why Van Gaal is out and Jose is in is – get this – because the Dutchman has just rented a new property in Bowden, and he’s paying on a rolling monthly contract. Van Gaal only needs to give a month’s notice should he need to leave pronto.
“Wonder if he’ll bother to unpack?” asks the Sun.
Over in the Star, Jeremy Cross says with Jose Mourinho “available for free” United must move for him. Free? A few days ago, the Press were full of news that Jose had agreed to join United for a mere £15m a year for three years.
Such are the facts…
Posted: 15th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer balls: Manchester United and Arsenal in Aubameyang clickbait drama
Transfer balls: The Mail says Manchester United are to spend £70m summer on Borussia Dortmund striker Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang. After that United will move to recruit Robert Lewandowski, Neymar and Gareth Bale.
All this on the same day Louis Van Gaal says United’s best chance of competing in next season’ Champions’ League is through winning the Europa League.
Apparently United’s executive vice-chairman Ed Woodward says club has “cash reserves of £121.6m and indicated there will be ‘star signings’ in the summer.” That’s the same Woodward who sanctioned the £250m United spent on the last set of new boys. you get the feeling that £3m-a=year Woodward is not part of the solution to United’s fall from the perch.
In other news, the Metro says: “Arsenal ready to seal transfer of Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang.” That dire paper’s source is the equally dire Daily Telegraph, which reports “Arsenal are already plotting how to strengthen their squad with Borussia Dortmund striker Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang one of their principle targets.”
Number of quotes and sources to support that claim: nil.
Posted: 14th, February 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United lose a match that Sunderland didn’t win
All newspapers agree that Sunderland never beat Manchester United yesterday.
Sunderland never did fashion two goals to United’s one in a Premier League win that gives them hope of avoiding relegation. The papers all agree that Sunderland only won a home match because United were not good enough to avoid defeat.
United were “Roo-bish”. Sunderland were invisible.
Posted: 14th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Mourinho earns more at Manchester United than Pep does at Manchester City, or is it less?
How much does Jose Mourinho earn as manager of Manchester United? The former Chelsea boss has not signed for United, but the Press is full of news that the deal is done.
The Mirror says it’s £15m a year for three years. The Express agrees. The Mirror’s Darren Lewis has details:
Jose Mourinho is set to land a three-year, £15million-a-year deal to replace Louis van Gaal at Manchester United. The package awaiting the former Chelsea boss will put him on a par with Pep Guardiola
Pep must be gutted. But the Sun has news to stop him from asking City for a raise:
JOSE MOURINHO will pocket £15million-a-season if he joins Manchester United in the summer — £6m LESS than rival’s City are giving Pep Guardiola
Such are the facts…
Posted: 12th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United balls: Van Gaal stays, Mourinho works for free, thank god for Leicester City
No sooner have we read the details of Jose Mourinho’s contract to manage Manchester Untied – £15m a year for three years (Mirror); £300m on players (Star) – than the Sun, which has been hyping the story of Jose to United for days and days, announces: “Louis Van Gal believes he’ll keep job if United make Champions League.”
For reasons only it knows, the Sun dresses LVG as Star Wars character Obi-Wan Kenobi, and declares: “May The 4th Be With You.”
The Mail says Van Gaal enjoys the support of United’s £3m -a-year chief executive Ed Woodward – he’s the man who rubber-stamped the Dutchman’s £250m on new players. But the Sun says in a conference call with United’s major investors Woodward “failed to mention LVG”. It’s not hard to imagine United’s major investors not having the foggiest idea who manages the club, nor caring. It’s all about money. The Star says United are expected to “smash though the £500m turnover barrier in 2016”.
Over in the Mirror, which only yesterday announced that Van Gaal is to leave United in the summer, we hear more from the investors. They asked: “Why Can’t United be more like Leicester?” The cynic would reply: ‘Because big football clubs are vanity projects for the super-rich, or, as in United’s case, a way of raising tens of millions for their owners’ other projects and real passions.” The other answer is that Leicester’s highest ever league finishing position was when they came runners-up in 1928–29 – who wants to be like them?
David McDonell tells Mirror readers: “Leicester have demolished the belief that the only way to become champions was by flexing financial muscles in the transfer market.” They haven’t. Leicester have won nothing yet. the Mirror’s the paper that yesterday reported: “What could Jose Mourinho’s Manchester United team look like.” No unheralded players from Fleetwood town, whence Jamie Vardy joined Leicester for £400,000, in this dream team. The Mirror’s says Mourinho’s United must buy: Cristiano Ronaldo, John Stones and Atletico Madrid sporting director Andrea Berta.
Star Wars, indeed.
Although, once upon a time, in a galaxy far, far away, United paid £1 million for 23-year-old Cambridge United striker Dion Dublin. He was United’s only major signing of the 1992 summer. (They bought Eric Cantona later.) Next season they won the title for the first time in 26 years. Dublin made only four appearances for United. But the players who featured most heavily in that league campaign – Peter Schmeichel (42), Brian McClair (41), and Ryan Giggs (40), cost United £505,000 from Brondby, nothing, and £850,000 from Celtic, respectively.
Leicester have demolished nothing – it’s the Premier League and lazy media that have turned it into a bubble.
Posted: 12th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer Balls: Manchester United hire Mourinho to get Bale, Neymar, Muller, Pogba and sell Mata
Jose Mourinho’s PR department is working overtime to convince everyone and anyone that he is the next Manchester United manager. Why Manchester United would want a divisive, man rejected twice by Chelsea is not something that bothers the Star which spots Jose’s £300m “WAR CHEST”.
Is that all the money Mourinho’s earned in redundancy fees from Roman Abramovich? No. It’s the cash United will give him to buy lots of players. That’s how good Jose is – just give him £300m to spend on new players and he will make Manchester United competitive. Sure, Claudio Raniei will do it for around £20m, but he’s not got chronic small-man syndrome and an urgent desire to be the star. So Jose gets the cash to buy – get this – Neymar, Cavani, Thomas Muller, Paul Pogba and Raphael Varane.
Yeah, really. And so long as they’re happy to work in Jose’s shadow, they’ll be on the fist plane to Manchester.
The Express says Jose will sign a three-year deal worth £15m a year and buy – deep breath – Neymar, Gareth Bale, Ross Barkely, Jamie Rodgriguez, and Aymeric Laporte.
The Mail says Jose’s first act will be to “purge” United of Juan Mata and Marouane Felliani.
No word on what he’ll do to the United medical staff.
But Jamie Jackson doe tell Guardian readers that, er, Mourinho “may look outside the Premier League for his next job having not yet been contacted by United”.
Such are the facts.
Posted: 11th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer balls: Manchester City and Manchester United in Neymar ‘war’
Transfer balls: Manchester United and Manchester City – the Sun’s “Manc Giants” – are in a 144 “transfer war” for Neymar. That’s Neymar who has stated over and over that he wants to remain at Barcelona.
But Pep Guardiola, the Manchester City manager-in-waiting, has made the Brazilian his ‘No.1 target”. And that £144m burning holes in Manchester pockets will trigger Neymar’s release clause. The only stumbling blocks are that the player might not want to live and work in Manchester and paying £144m for one player can destroy team structure.
The Sun’s scoop falls apart because it offers not single word from Man United or City about their desire to invest £144m in buying Neymar. All the paper “reveals” is that the huge figure features in Neymar’s Barcelona contract. On the same page you can read that Real Madrid were ready to insert a – get this – £400m in David De Gea’s contract should be have joined them last summer.
Is De Gea that much better than Neymar?
Is football a huge bubble inflated by the super-rich and mega-vain waiting to go ‘pop’?
Antony Kastrinakis says the City v United “war” for Neymar is “more important than any game United and City will play on the pitch”. Wow! Just wow! When did football stop being a sport for athletes and become a boardroom contest? When did football fans lose the thing we enjoy?
Posted: 10th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer balls: Manchester United go for Spurs boss Pochettino as Mourinho stirs
According to the Sun, Mario Pochettino “could wreck Jose Mourinho’s dream of of becoming Manchester United’s next manager”. The story that the current Spurs manager could be on his way to Old Trafford is the Sun’s lead sports story. The Sun says it “understands” Manchester United have spoken to Pochettino’s people.
Could. Understands. No facts, then.
Presumably, Pochettino’s people showed United’s people the Premier League table, pointing out that Spurs are higher than United. Why would Pottechino leave Spurs just as they look a Champions League outfit to manage a desperate United? It would be a move hard to understand.
The Sun adds that United’s people are also talking with Jose Mourinho’s people. The former Chelsea boss is “desperate” to manage United. How we know the camps are talking is most likely down to Jose’s people leaking the news in the hope their man gets the top job he craves.
Also today, the Sun declares:
Man Utd news: Renato Sanches deal planned — if club appoint Jose Mourinho as boss
Mourinho’s agent is Jorge Mendes. Sanches is managed by… Jorge Mendes. “United have been tracking the 18-year-old Benfica midfielder all season and are weighing up at £46million bid in the summer,” says the Sun.
Mr 10% is rubbing his hands.
Inside the Sun we read that United’s board like what Pochettino had done with the Spurs youth system, bringing on players like Harry Kane, Dele Alli and Eric Dier. We’re also told that getting Pochettino would cost United £20m because the Spurs board are tough negotiators and the manager is under contract until 2019.
And so it is that Pochettino and Mourinho are in a “two-horse race to me the United job”.
That’s odd because the Sun reported in December that Mourinho to Manchester was “all but agreed”:
Jose Mourinho to Manchester United all but agreed – the final decision on sacking Louis van Gaal is now down to the Glazers – EXCLUSIVE:American owners deciding whether to swing axe now or wait for Stoke result on Boxing Day
Such are the facts.
Posted: 9th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United balls: Van Gaal laughs off jourbnalists working for Jose Mourinho’s PR machine
Manchester United were denied an away win at Chelsea by an injury-time Diego Costa strike. At the post-match Press conference, a journalist asked Louis Van Gaal, Man United’s manager, about getting the sack and being replaced by Jose Mourinho. The Mail leads with LVG’s reply, which Sami Mokbel calls a “bizarre rant”.
Mourinho is looking for work. He wants to manage Manchester United. Why United would want the divisive Portuguese coach at the ‘Theatre of Dreams” is a moot point. But he’s looking for work, and the Mourinho to Man United PR campaign is in full swing.
Rob Harris of the Associated Press has the full text of what the tabloids call Van Gaal’s “fury at Mourinho job talk” (Mirror):
Harris to Van Gaal: “Although you dropped points, the performances are improving. Do you think that is important while the club are trying to replace you that you are put in the performances that show you might be value to the club?”
Van Gaal: “You have spoken with Ed Woodward?”
Harris: “Well the club aren’t denying it.”
Van Gaal: “Why do they have to deny? I don’t interfere neither. Why do the club have to deny it when you are creating stories?”
Harris: “I don’t know if you know what I write.”
Van Gaal: “OK, OK, so you haven’t spoken to Ed Woodward or the Glazers, so you are inventing this story. I don’t have to answer this question and I shall repeat myself every week. Now I have to say that you are getting the sack tomorrow. What is your name? Then I can announce the name also.”
Fury? Van Gal seem to have made a reasoned argument. Harris has not heard from anyone at Man chester United about moves to replace Van Gaal. Like us, he just read it in the papers.
Journalism is about getting the scoop – it’s about filling the space not already occupied by adverts.
Posted: 8th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer balls: Neymar to jail or Manchester United
Transfer balls: The Sun has news that Neymar is “in the frame” to join Manchester United. Why would the Brazilian leave mighty Barcelona to join underwhelming United? Let’s read on…
Neymar has put Premier League suitors on red alert after his dad revealed he could quit Barcelona. Manchester United lead the race for the Brazil superstar, with rivals City and Chelsea also monitoring the situation.
Monitoring the situation is tabloid speak for ‘waiting for a phone from the player’s agent’.
The Sun’s big sports story is based on “reports in Spain”, which says an “unnamed club” has offered £144.4million for Neymar. All Neymar’s dad – the sole source for news of that mega offer – will reveal is that the mystery is club is not Real Madrid.
Over to Spain, then, where Catalunya radio’s Jordi Borda is responding to the Sun’s news. He tweets:
Neymar pare li ha dit al jutge que el seu fill només vol renovar amb l Barça tot i q té una oferta milionària x marxar. Ha parlat d’una oferta de 190 milions. (Neymar’s father told the judge that his son just wants to renew with the club even though he has a multi-million offer. He spoke of an offer of €190m.)
That’s the judge in an investigating into allegations that Neymar is involved in fraud.
The allegations refer to image rights contracts from 2006 when Neymar was a teenager playing for Santos. Prosecutors allege further fraud occurred during negotiations to take him to Barcelona in 2011. He joined the Catalan giants in 2013.
The Sun must have forgotten to read the part about Neymar wanting to remain at Barcelona.
Posted: 5th, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Pep Guardiola manages Manchester United in his spare time
Son good is Pep Guardiola that he’s already helping Manchester United win matches – and he’s not even their manager. He doesn’t join Manchester City til the summer. But according to Sky Sports, United’s 3-0 home win over a crestfallen Stoke City – they went into the match having been dumped out of the League Cup on a semi-final penalty shoot-out and beaten in the FA Cup a few days later – was a sign of Pep’s mastery. The headline declares:
Man Utd respond in style after Man City’s Pep Guardiola announcement
On the field, United’s two wins from their past 10 Premier League games, their lowest goal-haul in 27 years and the continued uncertainty around Louis van Gaal’s future offered little suggestion a ray of hope would arrive with the visit of Mark Hughes’ Stoke.
Yet, 24 hours on from Man City’s big moment, the United players seemed inspired into a response.
All Louis Van Gaal had to do to make his expensive team of plodders into world-beaters was wait for a rival to hire a better manager. Easy.
The Guardian continues:
If this is how Pep Guardiola’s impending arrival across town can galvanise Manchester United then the rest of the season for Louis van Gaal and his men may be fruitful after all.
How clever of United’s kingmakers not to employ Pep hen they can get the Pep Effect with Van Gaal.
There is no certainty the Spaniard’s decision to join Manchester City had anything to do with this scintillating United display, of course. But it is fair to say that just when the embattled Van Gaal would want his players to return their finest display of the campaign they did.
United fans must be delighted, In yer face City!
PS: This is how the pisspoor Telegraph reported on United’s reaction to Pep:
]
Panicked into victory!
Posted: 3rd, February 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Transfer balls: Aubameyang in Manchester United, Liverpool and Arsenal clickbait boost
“If an offer comes, then we need to discuss it. If it should go into the hundreds of millions, then we also need to talk to the player. But I’m not worrying about it because at the moment we want to keep him as long as possible, best beyond 2020.”
If a team offers nutzoid money for Aubameyang, Dortmund will flog him. Maybe. By the time that statement reached some readers it had mutated into all manner of Transfer Balls:
The Express conjured up news about Arsenal and Liverpool:
Are Arsenal and Liverpool shocked to learn that if they offer hundreds of millions of pounds for a player they stand a decent chance of recruiting him?
The Telegraph’s readers hear that Aubameyang could join Arsenal for hundreds of millions below the headline:
Aubameyang back in the picture
No. He’s not. Well, not unless Arsenal decided to spend hundreds of millions on one player and he’s painted by Picasso and Van Gogh.
The Metro conjures: “Dortmund will consider selling Arsenal target Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang”
Yes. They will. Just as Barcelona will ‘consider’ selling Lionel Messi to Manchester United / Arsenal / Bournemouth / anyone for, say, £2billion. Make the number big enough and Manchester United’s owner would probably sell the club to Manchester City.
The apogee of this utter balls is in the Star, which tells Arsenal and Liverpool fans:
A boost. Being told the player will stray at Dortmund unless a team pays hundreds of millions is boost is a ‘boost’.
Liverpool and Man United’s owners must be punching the air.
Posted: 2nd, February 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Liverpool, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United: Van Gaal quit talk won’t quit
Is Manchester Untied manager Louis Van Gaal a quitter? Is he going to quit Old Trafford? Is he… Well, you get the idea. The Press are obsessed with the idea of Van Gaal leaving his job. What loon would walk out of a job managing one of the world’s great football clubs?
Today’s Star leads with news that Van Gaal is sane enough to realise he’s got a fantastic job. He’s not quitting. In fact, he says “I Will Never Quit”. The Daily Mail has much the same news:
It all ads up to nothing. It’s a no-news news story. What Van Gal told the Press was:
“I have not mentioned that [quitting] ever. I think that you make your own stories. Then I have to answer your stories.”
Let’s have a look at the balls the Press has reported on Van Gaal quitting:
Such are the facts.
Posted: 29th, January 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United v The Sun II: paper at club at odds of Van Gaal resignation
The Sun says Manchester untied manager Louis Van Gaal offered to resign but the Man United board ordered him to stay.
But Manchester United says the Sun’s scoop is balls. On the BBC we read: “Sources have told BBC Sport no such conversation took place.”
But the Sun says it is “understood” the conversation did take place.
This is the second time in under a week the Sun has been contradicted by United. The paper reported that Man United’s reps had met Pep Guardiola at a Paris hotel. United said that was balls.
Either the Sun is writing nonsense, or else the club is lying.
And what, then, of the Mirror’s news?
This is not only a fight over Van Gaal’s future – it looks like United dealmaker Ed Woodward is fighting to save his job at United.
Posted: 26th, January 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports, Tabloids | Comment
Victor Valdes says goodbye to Manchester United in comical fashion
Goodbye, Manchester United, says goalkeeper Victor Valdes. It’s been hard… What’s that?
Posted: 25th, January 2016 | In: manchester united, Sports | Comment
Manchester United: Van Gaal on the brink, Giggs gets the job, Mourinho promises the title
Following defeat to Southampton, Louis Van Gaal has let it be know that he’s “very disappointed” he is unable “to reach the expectations of the fans”. The Daily Mail (“GET Rid of LVG”), says those who pay Van Gaal are condidering ‘letting him go’.
The paper says United’s executive vice-chairman, Ed Woodward, has asked senior players what they think of the Dutchman. They told him of their problems with Van Gaal. They have “stopped responding”.
The Mail says Van Gaal’s end will spell promotion for Ryan Giggs. But Gigs wants the job on a long contract, not just to be an interim boss. Giggs is the “most likely choice”, readers are told.
Unless Jose Mourinho can get the job he craves. The Mail says the former Chelsea manager is “desperate” for the job. His agent has, reportedly, told United’s dealmakers Mourinho can win the title in his first season at Old Trafford. He did not add “or your money back!”
The Sun says it’s “GAAL OVER’. The paper says he’s “on the brink” of “quitting” United. For months the Sun’s being saying Van Gaal’s been on the brink. That brink is wide and generous.
The Mirror says Van Gaal “edges closer to ending the misery”. He has “dropped a quit hint”. He hasn’t.
Meanhwile, not one newspaper lead with a well cone to Southampton, who on much smaller budget than United’s, won the game.
Posted: 25th, January 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports | Comment
Jose Mourinho writes to Manchester United: ‘I love you… I can change’
Jose Mourinho has written a “six-page love letter to United”, says the Independent.
Sadly, we don’t get to see any extracts from the former Chelsea manager’s love letter. We just get told how respectful Jose is to Louis Van Gaal, the current Man United boss. Which sounds a lot of utter balls when you realise the Dutchman’s contract runs until 2017. If the letter exists, it is surely a pitch for the man’s job and with it his sacking.
The Indy notes:
Though many among the United hierarchy were more open to appointing the Portuguese than they were when Sir Alex Ferguson retired in 2013, the former Chelsea manager’s camp were made aware that there was a still a considerable faction at the club opposed to hiring him. The reasons are thought to range from Mourinho’s regular controversies, his style of football and his failure to nurture young talent.
The Portuguese is well aware of this thinking, and that is why he took the decision to write a lengthy document, emphasising just how much he wants the job and how he would be willing to adapt his style to meet United’s principles. They have traditionally prided themselves on playing open, attacking football, and they have always set great store on developing their own young players.
In his submission Mourinho also presented a forensic analysis of this season’s team…
Is this PR dressed as a new story – dire off the missive, leak it to the Press and see what occurs? Look out for life-size cardboard cut-outs of Jose Mourinho in the Old Trafford stands.
And are United fans so desperate they want Mourinho, a man who delivers silverware but in a caustic style of management reliant on slash and burn-out? Is Jose so desperate to get one over on Chelsea, keen to show the club where he cemented his reputation and from where he was twice sacked that it wasn’t him, it was them? Could any Chelsea fan stand to be on the receiving end of his snark and sneer, to see him lead United to glory?
Mourinho’s agent Jorge Mendes says the letter is nonsense, writing on his company’s website:
With regard to news published today in the British Press about Jose Mourinho, Jorge Mendes explained the following: “It does not occur to anyone that a coach like Jose Mourinho can write letters to clubs offering their services. It is absolutely ridiculous and totally absurd. “
Absurd. Ridiculous. But believable. This is Mourinho who once hid in a laundry basket. He wants that Man United job.
Posted: 24th, January 2016 | In: Back pages, Chelsea, manchester united, Sports | Comment
