Spurs | Anorak - Part 9

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Spurs football club news, Spurs transfers, Premier League Tottenham Hotspur

Spurs Balls: ‘Hurrikane’ Harry Kane thrashes Arsenal in headline wars

HARRY Kane is the darling of White Hart Lane, or White Heart Kane, as it is dubbed. Having scored both goals in Spurs’ 2-1 win over Arsenal, Harry Kane is the talk of the sports press. And the good think about Harry is that his name makes for decent puns.


The Sunday Times gets Shakespearean:


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The Star on Sunday goes with White Hart Kane:



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The Independent has a cumbersome “Kane Thrashes Arsenal”:


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Sunday Express: Kane and Able. That’s a Jeffrey Archer pun on the Bible’s Caine and Abel, a story of murder. Still. A pun’s a pun, right?



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The Sunday Telegraph is on the same wavelength:


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The Mail on Sunday win with “Hurrikane”.


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Posted: 7th, February 2015 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment

Arsenal host the “Jimmy Savile Fan Club’, says Google Maps: Spurs Fans Follow The Pattern

Type ‘Jimmy Savile Fan Club’ into Google Maps and you find its location: Arsenal’s Emirates stadium.


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jimmy savile arsenal



This sort of thing has previous. A search for ‘Shit Hole’ sends Google map users to Tottenham Hotspurs ground:


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But surely that’s where the Golden State Warriors play:





Posted: 7th, February 2015 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Spurs | Comment (1)

‘Huge’ Transfer Balls for Arsenal, Liverpool, Tottenham, Manchester United but not Southampton or Reading

Transfer Balls: As the January Deadline Day shuts the Daily Express tosses more balls than Rebecca Loos at a Peppa Pig Stag do:

Story 1:

Arsenal, Liverpool, Tottenham and Man Utd target Morgan Schneiderlin’s HUGE transfer hint


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The HUGE tranfger hint is – get this – that Schneiderlin is not going to Arsenal, Liverpool, Tottenham or Manchester United. The HUGE transfer hint involves a club not mentioned in the headline: Southampton.

And that hint amount to Morgan tweeting: “Very happy to be back training ! Thanks to all who did help me and made me work hard to come back stronger!”

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Posted: 2nd, February 2015 | In: Arsenal, Liverpool, manchester united, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Transfer Balls: Spurs buy Jay Rodriguez for £5m less than Liverpool and Manchester City got him for

Transfer Balls: Can it be true that Spurs are ‘Tottenham Hotsplurge”, a club about to splash out £60m on three players? The Sun says it is:


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With the transfer window open, Spurs fans reading the Sun‘s screamer would suppose the players are arriving now. Are they?

SPURS want to start a £60million mega-spree by landing Jay Rodriguez before tomorrow’s deadline.

Exciting stuff. They’re coming. It’s a “spree”:

Tottenham have asked Southampton about the England striker and also have their eyes on summer moves for French pair Yohan Cabaye and Aymeric Laporte.

They’re coming…in the summer (so long as no other clubs outbid Spurs and the players want to join them).

But what about Southampton’s Jay Rodriguez?

Rodriguez has been a long-term target for Liverpool and Manchester City but Spurs could step in and snatch him early. The 25-year-old’s contract runs out next season and Saints want to tie him to a long-term deal.

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Posted: 1st, February 2015 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comments (8)

Gareth Bale talks about loving Arsenal, not doing things and KIen Follett

The Daily Mirror has transcribed Gareth Bale’s interview on Spanish radio. It wasn’t all that hard: Bale spoke in fluent English, throughout. The highlight picked out by all papers is that Bale used to enjoy watching Arsenal “a lot”. Bale, is, of course, a former Spurs player. But it’s no big shocker. Arsenal have played better and more succesful football than Spurs for so long their rivalry is largely the stuff of historical record.


For our money the highlights are these:

How are the Spanish classes going?

Well, I have classes two or three times a week and I understand more and talk more all the time.

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Posted: 29th, January 2015 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Spurs Transfer Balls: Delph, Rabiot, Benteke and a ‘new Messi’ lead the charge

Spurs Transfer Balls: so who are Tottenham buying this January Transfer Window? We’ve looked through the mainstream media for insight into which footballers at heading to The Lane. It turns out ther are loads of them. Grab the scattergun:

Evening Standard: “Tottenham transfer news: Spurs eye Seydou Doumbia but club are reluctant to meet forward’s £25m buy-out clause”

The Indy: “Fenerbahce striker Emmanuel Emenike continues to be linked with a move to White Hart Lane after his agent claimed Tottenham remain in the hunt for the Nigeria international.”

The Indy: “Spurs enter race for £27m Manchester United target Nicolas Gaitan; Carlos Bacca deal close”

Belfast Telegraph: “Spurs desperate to land in-form striker Danny Ings

Telegraph: “Villa face losing 25-year-old Fabian Delph for nothing at the end of his contract in the summer, but, again, Tottenham believe the Midlands club are prepared to forgo the fee they could get for the England international now in a bid to boost their chances of survival.”

Daily Express: “Liverpool LEADING Arsenal and Spurs in £5m to land ‘Iranian Messi’ Sardar Azmoun

Evening Standard: “PSG midfielder Adrien Rabiot wants Spurs loan move”

Daily Mirror: “Spurs have their eyes on a series of strikers from West Brom’s Saido Berahino to Valencia’s Paco Alcacer to long-term target Christian Benteke… Napoli’s experienced Spanish star Raul Albiol is one ambitious target.”

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Posted: 14th, January 2015 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment (1)

Transfer Balls: Manchester United sign Lloris from Spurs in 2019

The Sun leads its sports sections with an exclusive. No, make that an hyperbolic “Mega Exclusive”. Spurs are selling their best player:


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It’s the January transfer window. So. Hugo Lloris, for it is he, is off this month?

TOTTENHAM are set to cash in on £25million-rated Hugo Lloris. The French No 1 will be allowed to leave for a Champions League club in the summer — even if Spurs seal a top-four spot of their own.

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Posted: 5th, January 2015 | In: manchester united, Sports, Spurs | Comments (3)

Spurs Balls: Yid Army soon to be owned by Jew-hating Qatar

Can it be that Spurs – home to the ‘Yid Army’ – are to be owned by the Qatari government in a £1billion takeover?

The Sun reports:

The Arabian nation’s sports minister Salah bin Ghanem bin Nasser al-Ali says they want a Premier League club as the Gulf state’s next sporting investment.

But Spurs… The Yids?

Al-Ani promised any takeover would include pumping in the kind of money that helped them transform Paris Saint-Germain from chronic under-achievers to French champions and an emerging European giant.

Nice idea. Problem is that PSG play in a one-team league. The Premier League is a bit trickier.

And with Tottenham owner Joe Lewis ready to talk business if a buyer meets his asking price, the North London side could be the next under foreign ownership.

Al-Ani said: “Of course Qatar wants to own a Premier League club. One hundred per cent. Here in Qatar we are very, very good in taking something and really transforming it into something very, very good. Even if it’s good we take it to another ste.”…

Al-Ani hinted they are looking at clubs ripe for plucking — and Spurs would head that list, especially with a new 56,000- capacity stadium coming.

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Posted: 17th, December 2014 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment (1)

Spurs Pitch Invaders: Funny or nah?

IT has been revealed that the three people who disrupted Tottenham Hotspurs’ Europa League match with Partizan Belgrade were internet japesters who are well known for their pranks.

The three are part of a gaggle of gagsters called TrollStation, who in the past, have faked kidnappings and turned Tube trains into ad-hoc stripclubs. Imagine Jackass, without the Skateboards and you’re halfway there.

Alas, the three men are still in police custody after being arrested following their on-pitch antics.

Here’s some footage.

As you can see, some of the invasions were for a decent amount of time, as the blokes had time to take some selfies while darting around the players.

Each of the jokers wore shirts that said BassBuds on them, which is the company that make Spurs branded headphones. They weren’t impressed, saying: “We are appalled that the game was interrupted in this manner. We do not condone the interruption of any sporting fixture in this way.” Spurs were less impressed and cut all ties with BassBuds.

Here’s some more footage.

TrollStation themselves managed to upload a video of their antics (which you can see below), where the invaders state: “Today we’re going to see who lasts longer on the pitch.”

It seems, despite the arrests, they’re planning another gag too, with a tweet suggesting: “The questions is Emirates Stadium or Stamford Bridge?”

Thing is, while it is annoying that a football match should be broken up and disjointed in this way, surely the staid, rarified air of professional football should be broken up now and then with… well… some piss-taking.

No-one was hurt (apart from BassBuds accountancy sheets) and Spurs won the match? Surely we should all just laugh at this and the lads who got on the pitch should get nothing more than a fine?

Posted: 29th, November 2014 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comments (2)

Transfer Balls: Which Player Is Heading To Arsenal, Manchester United, West Ham, Swansea, Everton, Hull And Spurs?

TRANSFER Balls: Marseilles striker Andre Ayew has uttred not word on moving to the Premier League. But that hasn’t stopped the media from speculating:

Daily Express, November 13: “Andre Ayew could join Arsenal, Liverpool or Manchester United for just £1.5m in January”

SpyGhana, November 5: “West Ham looks to sign Andre Ayew”

Liverpool Echo, November 3 2014: “Everton FC transfer gossip: Blues eye Ayew January swoop”

Hull Daily Mail, October 20: “Hull City face competition to bring in the forward during the January transfer window.”

The Sun, October 19: “Liverpool, Everton, Swansea, Hull and West Ham are all keen and are watching developments.”

Daily Express, October 14: “Arsenal, Liverpool, Man Utd and Spurs handed January BOOST with Andre Ayew set for exit”

Daily Star, October 14: “Arsenal, Liverpool, Newcastle, Manchester United and Spurs target Andre Ayew set for January switch”

In other news, Andre Ayew is going to Napoli

Posted: 13th, November 2014 | In: Arsenal, Liverpool, manchester united, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Arsenal Thrash Spurs But Chelsea Not Manchester United Win The Football Map Of London

IN London: The Information Capital by James Cheshire and Oliver Uberti, the academics plotted London’s football clubs by popularity on Twitter for the 2013/14 season.

Each square represents 500m x 500m – and its colour indicates the football club with the most-tweeted hashtag in that area.





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Posted: 12th, November 2014 | In: Arsenal, Chelsea, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Spurs Balls: Useless Adebayor And Weak Pochettino Make One Man Dream Of ‘Man’s Man’ Tim Sherwood

SPURS Balls: The Daily Mail’s Neil Ashton has been talking about Adebayor:

November 5, 2014:

At White Hart Lane on Sunday, Mauricio Pochettino has to make the biggest decision of his short career as head coach of Tottenham: Emmanuel Adebayor cannot play. The striker’s lack of commitment at Villa Park last Sunday, when he was dragged off after 58 minutes, was not just an affront to his team-mates, it was an insult to the sport itself. For Pochettino to make his mark at Spurs, to show the players that he really is the boss, Adebayor cannot be in that team to face Stoke City.

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Posted: 5th, November 2014 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment (1)

Transfer Balls: Spurs Sell Lloris To Real Madrid But Barcelona Already Bought Him

TRANSFER Balls: Is Spurs ‘keeper Hugo Lloris on his way to Real Madrid? The Daily Express has an “Exclusive” that says he is…maybe:

EXCLUSIVE: Real Madrid prepare a MEGA £20m bid for Tottenham keeper Hugo Lloris

REAL MADRID are ready to launch a £20million January move for Tottenham goalkeeper Hugo Lloris.

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Posted: 1st, November 2014 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment

Spurs Balls: Erik Lamela Wonder Strike Makes Pochettino Think Of Bed


SPURS Balls: Last night on the Europa League, Erik Lamela gave us all reason to regret not tuning in when he scored a sublime goal. What would have been Tottenham’s routine 5-1 win over Greek side Asteras (it Tripolis (it says her) was burnished with Lamela’s stupendous ‘rabona’-style strike from 20 yards.

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Posted: 24th, October 2014 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment

Transfer Balls: Arsenal Mascot Podolski Signs For Spurs Again



TRANSFER Balls: Is Arsenal’s Lukas Podolski leaving the Gunners to play for…Spurs? Well, ITV had news.

Podolski set to join Arsenal’s fierce rivals Spurs in £10m deal

Is he?

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Posted: 21st, October 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Spurs Balls: Harry Redknapp Almost Signed Viera And Luis Suarez, Says Harry Redknapp

QPR manager Harry Redknapp  has his latest book serialised in the Daily Mail.

Having talked utter balls about racism and Manchester City, the media’s favourite man on the inside explains who he signed Luis Suarez for Tottenham Hotspur from Ajax in 2011. Oh, no. Sorry. How he nearly signed Luis Suarez for Spurs had Liverpool not signed the brilliant Uruguayan.

“Despite all that has happened in his career since, one of the biggest regrets of my life in management is not taking Luis Suarez to Tottenham when we had the chance.”

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Posted: 9th, October 2014 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment

Arsenal v Spurs Balls: The Sun Puts Words In Wenger’s Mouth

THE Sun loves to turn football into a war. In readiness for Arsenal’s Premier League match with local London rivals Spurs, the paper thunders:

Wenger in Tottenham taunt ahead of North London derby

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Posted: 26th, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Spurs Fans Attack Manchester United In The Saddest Way Imaginable

IN football, you define yourself by your rivals. And Spurs – who last won the league title in 1961 – have decided that the team they can rib and goad is Manchester United, who have won the league title in colour.

This T-shirt was spotted for sale outside White Hart Lane tonight, where Spurs were playing Nottingham Forest (league winners: 1977).



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The TV show being lampooned by Wayne Rooney, Angel Dia Maria and Louis Van Gaal (two players who would walk into the Spurs side and a manager who declined the offer to manage Spurs) is Only Fools And Horses, which after peaking in the early 1980s, dribbled on until it excited only as a nostalgic tick, a Christmas treat right up there with adverts for Iceland’s frozen squirrels.

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Posted: 24th, September 2014 | In: manchester united, Sports, Spurs | Comments (3)

Spurs Balls: Partizan Belgrade Fans Call Jews Fools And State A Desire For Homosexual Sex with Horses

Jews Partizan


AT the Europa League Partizan Belgrade v Spurs match, the home fans added a bit of homemade art to the local colour. The message on the banner declared, somewhat crytically:

 “Only Jews And Pussies”

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Posted: 19th, September 2014 | In: Sports, Spurs | Comment

Transfer Balls: Arsenal Sign Swansea’s Wilfried Bony For Less Than Spurs And Liverpool Bought Him For

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TRANSFER Balls: The Daily Express reveals that Liverpool, Arsenal and Tottenham are in for “£19m target Wilfried Bony”. The headline ends a little esoterically: “CONFIRMS interest.”

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Posted: 17th, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Liverpool, Sports, Spurs | Comment (1)

Transfer Balls: Manchester City Target Spurs Striker Jay Rodriguez

TRANSFER Balls: A look at football reporting. Is Jay Rodriguez heading from Southampton to Spurs or Manchester City?

The Sun on Sunday reports that Manchester City will battle Spurs to to sign Southampton’s Jay Rodriguez, 25.

Back on July, the BBC’S Ben Smith said Spurs had agreed to buy Rodriguez. Well, so he had “understood”:


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The Guardian also “understood” things:

…it is understood personal terms have already been agreed in principle for a move to White Hart Lane.

Such are the facts…




Posted: 7th, September 2014 | In: Manchester City, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Transfer Balls: You’ll Never Believe Who Arsenal, Spurs, Liverpool, Chelsea, Yeovil And Manchester United Didn’t Bid For

TRANSFER Balls: Did Arsenal, Manchester City, Manchester United, Chelsea, Liverpool, Spurs or Yeovil (did we leave any out?) bid for Dutch striker Klaas-Jan Huntelaar? The Daily Express has a scoop:

 No Arsenal, Liverpool or Tottenham bid for Klaas-Jan Huntelaar.

Yes. The Express saays that no club bid for Huntelaar. Yeah, not even Bounemouth made a cheeky bid.

Ben Jefferson spells out the facts:


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This is the same Ben Jefferson who told Express readers that Liverpool and Araenal were going to war for the Dutchman:


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Posted: 5th, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Transfer Balls: Manchester United Sell Danny Welbeck To Arsenal But He Wanted Spurs

TRANSFER Balls: Is Manchester United and England’s Danny Welbeck on his way to Arsenal? Or is he on his way to Spurs? Let’s see what the media experts have been saying:


The Guardian says it’s Spurs!


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The Guardian says it’s Everton!


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Ian Herbert says it’s Arsenal for Welbeck!



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The Mirror says it’s Spurs!


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The Independent says it’s Arsenal!



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The Mail says it’s Spurs!

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Metro says it’s Arsenal!

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The Evening Standard says it’s Spurs!


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The Mail says it’s Arsenal!


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Such are the facts…

Posted: 1st, September 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Spurs | Comment

Transfer Balls: Arsenal And Spurs Battle It Out For The Player Neither Wanted

TRANSFER Balls: A look at football rumours being passed off as fact by the mainstream press. Let’s look at how much Arsenal and Spurs want the titchy Brazilian called Bernard.

The Daily Express has news:

Arsenal and Tottenham on alert with Brazilian starlet Bernard set for loan move

Ben Jefferson adds:

ARSENAL and Tottenham are on alert after Shaktar Donetsk revealed plans to try and send Bernard out on loan this season.

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Posted: 18th, August 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Spurs | Comment

World Cup Balls: Spurs Makeweight Andros Townsend Gives Arsenal And England Fans A Good Laugh



WORLD Cup Balls presents the wisdom of Spurs’ player Andros Townsend, now ‘writing’ for the Sun:

MISSING out on a World Cup is the most devastating thing in football. And it is good news that Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain should only sit out the opener against Italy.

As there is nothing more painful in the game than getting sidelined for the world’s biggest tournament.

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Posted: 6th, June 2014 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Spurs | Comments (6)