Royal Family Category
The Royal Family, the House of Windsor, in the news and on a horse
PIPPA Middleton has a new arse, and she’s keen to show it off to one and all.
A security review has been launched after a break-in at Buckingham Palace when a man scaled a fence to get inside the Queen’s home. Police said the man had been found “in an area currently open to the public during the day” and was arrested for burglary, trespass and criminal damage. A second man was arrested outside the palace for conspiracy to commit burglary following the incident shortly before 10.30pm on Monday.
An inner-city mansion packed with shiny things is always going to be a target.
The Telegraph thunders from its front page:
Palace break in: terrorist warning
PRINCESS Diana is back in the news. The Daily Express leads with a shocker:
NAOMI WATTS is plugging her new film, Her Last Love, the story of her rumoured love affair with Dr Hasnat Khan:
“There were definitely moments when I felt Diana’s presence – I dreamed about her a lot, too, and that’s a first,’ says Naomi Watts. ‘I kept wondering to myself: “Would she have liked it?” So I found myself constantly asking for her permission to carry on. I had saturated myself with Diana and her life and I felt this enormous responsibility of playing this iconic woman. It felt like I was spending a lot of time with her. There was one particular moment when I felt her permission was granted. That won’t sound right in print, I know.”
FACES of August 31 2013: John Loughrey (centre) looks at tributes left outside Kensington Palace, London, as a couple embrace, on the anniversary of the death of Diana, Princess of Wales, who was killed in a car crash in central Paris along with Dodi Fayed.
Well, was she slotted? Or does she live on the fabled Sixth Floor of Harvey Nichols department store?
THE silly season was punctuated by the return of Princess Diana. News was that someone in or close to the SAS murdered Di. So said “Soldier N”. The story was broken by Channel 4, which noted:
“The allegations, if true, ask some serious questions of Soldier N’s mental state of health”
Soldier N’s shocker was first made in a letter written in 2011 by his in-laws. This note was part of the second court martial against one of N’s colleagues’s, namely sniper Sgt Danny Nightingale who was found with a stack of ammo and a Glock pistol in his possession – souvenirs of overseas ops. N was testifying against Nightingale.
HOW did you celebrate the birth of Prince George? The Duchess’s former piano teacher, Daniel Nicholls, has created the tune First Breath. He tells Hello! it’s “a song about birth from the baby’s point of view”.
HOW does the Daily Mirror report on Prince George? With confusion, covering all angles in a welter of hagiographic praise and anti-monarchical rants presented as Republicanism:
Today The People (the Mirror’s Sunday cousin) tells readers:
Prince William is to take newborn son George to Princess Diana’s grave at the Althorp estate, the Sunday People can reveal.
The emotional pilgrimage to Diana’s resting place at the Spencer family’s ancestral home will be made by Wills and wife Kate this autumn.
Why wait until autumn? Why a pilgrimage? The headline says he has made the trip a “vow”.
In other news on Prince George in today’s Mirror:
Anyone else think it bit off to call a week-old child a “bore”?
FOR those of you who missed the Royal Baby Prince George coverage on the telly, here are a few highlights to keep as souvenirs:
Kay Burley gets a Brazilian
SO. How did the Sun’s Dublin and Belfast editions celebrate the birth of Prince George?
THE Guardian gives its online readers two versions of its front page. If you’re interested in the celebrity news that everyone else is getting, you can read its welter of facts and details on the Royal baby. If you’re not, you can click a small grey box that says “Republican” and read about Comic Con, a San Diego event “dedicated to creating awareness of, and appreciation for, comics“.
SKY NEWS’ Kay Burley was LIVE! outsides St Mary’s hospital for the Royal baby’s emergence. She did not smoke. She did not not bite her nails. Burley Kate eased her nerves by talking and talking and talking. At one point she asked the crowd what they thought of the news. A woman said she had been hoping for a boy. The man next to her added “the news it said black boy”. Burley was lost for words. he just smirks:
A ROYAL baby is born. Hold everything. Was is over. Get the experts to pen 300 words on blue planceta:
What was Kate’s birth weight? Hopefully, the Express’ sister organ, OK!, will confront that question:
ASK not what your can do for your future King but what your future King can do for you. Kate Middleton and Prince William’s son is but a few hours old and already he’s working hard:
TO Ballinrobe, Ireland, for the result of the Tote Return Profits To Racing M’dn H’dle on the night of the birth of Kate Middleton and Prince William’s son:
1st King William
2nd 4L Hospital
Third was a delighted Camilla Parker Bowles ridden by the…
LAST week Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge, gave birth. Well so said US Globe magazine:
Prince Charles’ drunken wife Camilla suffered a devastating secret collapse as it became clear new mom Kate and her baby are going to be…
STILL awaiting for the arrival of Kate Middleton’s baby, we turn for news to Hello! magazine. Lupo, Wills and Kate’s dog, has been talking:
“According to reports, Lupo has been nothing but co-operative — helping his owners choose their baby’s name by tapping on scraps of paper with his paw on which they’ve written a selection of their favourites.”
As Kirk Douglas told us in the film Ace in the Hole:
“I can handle big news and little news. And if there’s no news, I’ll go out and bite a dog.”
As any fool knows, dogs are useless at names. It’s Joey the budgie Kate wants:
AUSTIN Mitchell’s Tax Rate Is Lower Than That Of The Prince Of Wales….
A fact which makes his comments in the Commons yesterday really rather interesting.
Mitchell announced that the Prince of Wales pays tax at a lower rate than the poor do. He reached this conclusion by doing something fairly interesting:
Austin Mitchell said that the Prince’s accounts show that he paid less direct and indirect taxes as a percentage of income that the “bottom quartile of households” in Britain.
YOU could use the Royal wedding sick bag. Or you can splash out on a Royal Baby sick bag. Designer Lydia Leith never did produce a Kate Middleton morning sickness sick bag. That would have been in poor taste:
FLASHBACK snapshot: 1980 – “Lady Diana Spencer’s look of astonishment as she stalls her car – a new Mini Metro – outside her Earl’s Court flat when leaving for her job as a teacher at a kindergarten in Pimlico, London. Speculation continues that she may have a romantic involvement with the Prince of Wales.”
OUTSIDE St. Mary’s Hospital, London, the scene is set. Men and women with ladders and cameras are waiting to hear news of a new Royal baby.
Marcus Setchell, the Queen’s surgeon gynaecologist, is scrubbing up and giving the golden plunger a once over. to his side will be Alan Farthing, the surgeon gynaecologist to the royal household and former fiancé of Jill Dando, the BBC television presenter who was murdered in 1999. It’s a small world in the upper echelons, indeed.