Film | Anorak - Part 10

Film Category

Includes cinema reviews and trailers for upcoming films. A digest of the best and worst interviews on movies and cinema.

Failed audition tapes: Tom Selleck was Indiana Jones

Once upon a time, Tom Selleck was Indian Jones…briefly:

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Posted: 25th, September 2013 | In: Film, Flashback | Comment

Terrible rap: Top That from 1989 film Teen Witch is a horror show

IN the 1980s, white rap was routinely terrible. In this 1989 teen dream flick Teen Witch, the cast are forced on pain of death (we presume) to perform a rap called Top That.

teen witch

The film, for those of you not in the know, is:

Louise is not very popular at her highschool. Then she learns that she’s descended from the witches of Salem and has inherited their powers. At first she uses them to get back at the girls and teachers who teased her and to win the heart of the handsome footballer’s captain. But soon she has doubts if it’s right to ‘cheat’ her way to popularity. 

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Posted: 25th, September 2013 | In: Film, Music | Comment

Simon Cowell commentates as Pudsey the dog urinates on a tyre in Sarratt


WHAT news of Britain’s Got Talent winner Pudsey? Well, Pudsey has been filming Pudsey: The Movie. The Watford Observer reports that he’s gone a bit Depardieu and urinated on a Bovingdon man’s car while filming in Sarratt. This might be news if Pudsey were human. But it’s a dog. When Pudsey starts urinating as he opens the batting for England, then it’s news.

The first canine winner of ITV talent show Britain’s Got Talent has been spotted in Sarratt, relieving himself on a car wheel.

Was that in the script?

In the film Simon Cowell will be the voice of a pooch pal of the Britain’s Got Talent dog, while Mr Cowell’s fellow judge David Walliams will take on the voice of Pudsey.

A talking dog?

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Posted: 25th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Film | Comment

JD Salinger: Five new manuscripts and a post-Holocaust film to duck


JD Salinger died in  died in 2010 at age 91. Some of his unpublished works have been found. Cornel Bonca looks at them:

[T]his is the biggest literary “get” of the American 21st century.

The books include a World War II novel featuring Sergeant X from “From Esme,” the most intriguing character outside Holden and the Glass family that Salinger ever created. It includes a novella, in diary form, written by a World War II counterintelligence officer — Salinger’s job during the war — “culminating in the Holocaust.” Given Salinger’s war experience and his painstaking writing process, these two works could conceivably add up to a contribution to American World War II literature on a par with the work of Mailer, Jones, Heller, and Pynchon.

A third manuscript is, we’re told, a “manual of Vedanta,” a book explaining Vedanta Hinduism (and presumably, its relation to Salinger’s work), “with short stories, almost fables, woven into the text.” Finally, there are two compilations, one entitled The Family Glass, gathering all the published Glass stories together with five new storiesabout Seymour, the last of which “deals with Seymour’s life after death.” Given that once Salinger got going on the Glasses, his “stories” inevitably metastasized into novellas, this book is likely to be a real tome, and might conceivably be the greatest contribution Salinger makes to American letters, dealing as it must, with the question of how to live a genuine spiritual life in a postwar, post-Holocaust world.

Then there’s the final book, which [biographers David] Shields and [Shane] Salerno describe as “a complete history of the Caulfield family,” gatheringCatcher, six previously published (and I would imagine, wholly rewritten) Caulfield stories written in the early-to-mid 1940s, as well as new stories featuring, presumably, Holden, Phoebe, Allie, and D.B. Caulfield. Five new Salinger books! Doubtless, they will make us entirely reconceive Salinger’s current oeuvre. If the books are even close in quality to Catcher or Franny & Zooey, they might reroute the course of late 20th-century American literature.

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Posted: 22nd, September 2013 | In: Books, Film, Flashback | Comment

Haifaa Al-Mansour: Saudi Arabia’s first female direction on Wadjda and growing up where cinemas are forbidden

Director Haifaa Al Mansour poses during the photo call of the movie 'Wadjda' at the 69th edition of the Venice Film Festival in Venice, Italy, Friday, Aug. 31, 2012. (AP Photo/Joel Ryan)

WHAT’S it like being Saudi Arabia’s first female film director? Haifaa Al-Mansour knows. Well, it has tricky. She directed Wadjda via a walkie-talkie.

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Posted: 20th, September 2013 | In: Film | Comment

Terrible tag-lines: Patrick Swayze trails Next of Kin

bad tag lines next of kin

TERRIBLE Tag lines:

In 1989 Patrick Swayze starred in Next of Kin. The trailer was punctuated with Swayze uttering the cracking tag-line:

“You haven’t seen bad yet, but it’s coming…”

…to a cinema near you…

Posted: 15th, September 2013 | In: Film | Comment

New RoboCop trailer released – start wetting yourself with excitement, now!

Michael Keaton, left, Samuel L. Jackson, center, and Joel Kinnaman attend the "RoboCop" panel on Day 3 of Comic-Con International on Friday, July 19, 2103 in San Diego.. (Photo by Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP)

THE original RoboCop movie was a tense, bleak affair and any notion of remaking it was going to set everyone’s phasers to ‘uh-oh’. With that, the release of the trailer for the new movie will inevitably swing people either way.

Of course, there’ll be haters… but they’re wrong. That’s because the new RoboCop looks ACE!

Joel Kinnaman replaces Peter Weller as Murphy, who goes from Injured Cop to Super Cool Robot Cop.

There’s a fun cast too, including Samuel L. Jackson (of course), Gary Oldman and Michael Keaton (welcome back!), plus Abby Cornish as Murphy’s wife.

The new trailer shows loads of things getting shot, blown up and punched, which is all well and good, but the best bit is when Michael Keaton basically says ‘let’s make him look more bad-ass by making RoboCop’s suit black’.

There’s also a lovely ‘who is in control of the technology? The machine or man?’ which we’ll no doubt be able to read into, concerning our own technological habits… but mainly, it looks like it’ll be a hoot with loads of fighting and a cool baddie.

RoboCop should be released on Feb. 7, 2014. Here’s the trailer.

Photo :Michael Keaton, left, Samuel L. Jackson, center, and Joel Kinnaman attend the “RoboCop” panel on Day 3 of Comic-Con International on Friday, July 19, 2103 in San Diego.. (Photo by Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP)

Posted: 9th, September 2013 | In: Film | Comment

Acting masterclass: how to eat an egg like Faye Dunaway, Robert De Niro and Paul Newman

dunaway egg

IN this acting masterclass, we look at how to eat a hard boiled egg.

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Posted: 6th, September 2013 | In: Film | Comment

Diana the movie: brace yourselves for car crash cinema

LAST night’s premier of the Princess Diana romance featured no Royals, no Paul Burrell, no Tony Blair, no white Fiat Uno, three members of the SAS, Mr and Mrs Grassy Knoll, not Princess Diana’s lover Hasnat Khan (“It is based on gossip and Diana’s friends talking about a relationship that they didn’t know much about”), lots of paparazzi, “a squirmingly embarrassing script” (Times) , “car crash cinema” (Guardian) and Kathy Lette holding up a bag that we hope had a sick-proof lining loaded with irony:

Kathy Lette arriving for the Diana premiere at the Odeon Leicester Square, London. PRESS ASSOCIATION Photo. Picture date: Thursday September 5, 2013. Photo credit should read: Anthony Devlin/PA Wire

Posted: 6th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Film | Comment

Princess Diana gives five stars to Naomi Watts’ Her Last Love film

naomi watts

NAOMI WATTS is plugging her new film, Her Last Love, the story of her rumoured love affair with Dr Hasnat Khan:

“There were definitely moments when I felt Diana’s presence – I dreamed about her a lot, too, and that’s a first,’ says Naomi Watts. ‘I kept wondering to myself: “Would she have liked it?” So I found myself constantly asking for her permission to carry on. I had saturated myself with Diana and her life and I felt this enormous responsibility of playing this iconic woman.  It felt like I was spending a lot of time with her. There was one particular moment when I felt her permission was granted. That won’t sound right in print, I know.”






Posted: 6th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Film, Royal Family | Comment

Leads cast in Fifty Shades Of Grey… so start imagining them naked now

GOOD news everybody! The lead roles of Fifty Shades of Grey have been announced! You haven’t heard of them, but no matter, because the main bit of their job is to do a lot of sex, which is nice.

For those who must know, the British Charlie Hunnam and US actress Dakota Johnson will be taking their clothes off and talking to each other with clunky euphemisms, while Mumset tut about it all, before secretly frigging their collective pelvis off.

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Posted: 4th, September 2013 | In: Books, Film | Comment

RIP Jean E Hill – John Waters’ Desperate Living star

jean e hill

JEAN E. Hill has died. The actress most memorably appeared on greeting cards and played Grizelda Brown in John Waters’ Desperate Living:


Posted: 24th, August 2013 | In: Celebrities, Film | Comment

Worinelve! The latest instalment of Wolverine, apparently…


DOES anyone fancy going to the cinema to watch Human Ghjac in the latest blockbuster, Worinelve? Obviously, you haven’t heard of either of those things, but look at the photo of this prime cock-up and you’ll learn more.

And there we have it, a bus-sized balls-up where one advertiser will be annoyed at Stagecoach making a hash of their paid-for advertising… although, with this surely on the cusp of going viral, maybe we’ll see all future film ads being garbled in such a manner.

Now, where can we get Human Ghjac’s autograph?

Posted: 14th, August 2013 | In: Film | Comment

Francis Ford Coppola’s original cast list for The Godfather

AROUND 1970: Francis Ford Coppola produced this potential cast list for The Godfather.

godfather cast list

Posted: 27th, July 2013 | In: Film, Flashback | Comment (1)

The best British Jaegers – the Pacific Rim challenge

WHAT if Pacific Rim was set in Britain? Yeah. Pacific Rim? As if. First off, no-one would have been able to stop sniggering. And second, well, the sniggering right. But let’s imagine. In the film the characters are called Jaegers. (Yeah. Like the middle-class, provincial fashion outlets). Almost all these Jaegers have two two-noun names created in a Tokyo language school randomiser: Brawler Yukon; Coyote Tango, Solar Prophet and the excellent Gipsy Danger.

Warner Bros’ build-your-own-Jaeger toy lets you create your own:

british jaeger irn

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Posted: 26th, July 2013 | In: Film, Key Posts | Comment

Classic movies sing Ice Ice Baby

vanilla ice flm

LIKE classic movies? Like Vanilla Ice’s Ice Ice Baby? Of course you do. You’re not an idiot.

Well, how about both at the same time, with a fun mashup which gets Ghostbusters, Howard The Duck, Conan The Barbarian and more, rapping along to the famous hit?

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Posted: 23rd, July 2013 | In: Film, Music | Comment

The six best photos of Mel Smith using the European Film Award as a hairy phallus

RIP Mel Smith. The British comic marvel died aged just 60. The star of  Not the Nine O’Clock News and Alas Smith and Jones, directed the Mr Bean film and created Talkback, now one of the UK’s big producers of comedy TV.

In 1998, Mel was at a photocall at London’s Old Vic theatre to trail his appearance as a presenter of the European Film Awards. He’s presented the awards a further two occasions. Yep. Having tuned their trophy into a phallus, they invited him back:






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Posted: 22nd, July 2013 | In: Celebrities, Film | Comment

Railway Children gets first complaint in 42 years


WE all like complaining, but would you moan about something that is 42 years old? The British Board of Film Classification (BBFC) has received its first ever complaint for The Railway Children, which was first aired in 1970.

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Posted: 16th, July 2013 | In: Film | Comment

Michael Caine explains the power of blinking in this acting workshop


michael caine acting workshop

MICHAEL Caine shares with us the power of not blinking,. He keeps on going…. and going… in this acting workshop:

That’s an extract from a film acting class.. You can watch it all:

Posted: 9th, July 2013 | In: Celebrities, Film, Flashback | Comment

Hollywood: How the Zombie beat The Cowboy

TRUE **it.  The Zombie beats The Cowboy:

“Sometime in 2011 the total number of film plots with the keyword ‘zombie’ passed the number of film plots with the keyword ‘cowboy,’ according to the Internet Movie Database. One might argue that the zombie has become the great American archetype of the postmodern era, as the cowboy was the American archetype a century ago. With the release of Brad Pitt’s $200 million zombie epic World War Z, what used to be the stuff of low-budget shockers has entered the American cultural mainstream. Therein lies a lesson.”

zombie cowboy

Posted: 4th, July 2013 | In: Film | Comment

The 1982 Blade Runner convention reel

One of the Blade Runner Convention Reels featuring interviews with Ridley Scott, Syd Mead and Douglas Trumbull about making Blade Runner universe. This 16 mm featurette, made by M. K. Productions in 1982, is specifically designed to circulate through the country’s various horror, fantasy and science fiction conventions.

BLADE RUNNER is one of my all-time favourite films. The director’s cut is even better. Future Noir:

One of the Blade Runner Convention Reels featuring interviews with Ridley Scott, Syd Mead and Douglas Trumbull about making Blade Runner universe. This 16 mm featurette, made by M. K. Productions in 1982, is specifically designed to circulate through the country’s various horror, fantasy and science fiction conventions.

Posted: 3rd, July 2013 | In: Film, Flashback | Comment

Psycho slashed: Alfred Hitchcock’s classic in 24 seconds, 60 seconds and 11seconds

psycho shower

DOUGLAS Gordon’s version of Psycho last 24 hours. Alfred Hitchcock’s classic film also inspired Chris Bors to adapt the movie. He compacted the action into 24 seconds:

24 Second Psycho appropriates the entire Alfred Hitchcock moviePsycho and condenses it into twenty-four seconds. Tweaking the concept of artist Douglas Gordons 24 Hour Psycho, where Hitchcocks masterpiece was slowed-down to a crawl, here the process is reversed to accommodate society’s increasingly short attention span. Seeing Hitchcocks most lasting contribution to cinema flash before your eyes in a matter of seconds represents our new information age where culture is packaged for easy consumption at a breakneck pace.

But could the film be show faster? Yes. All hail Joe Frese’s  Sixty Second Psycho:

Maybe it can all be surmised in an 11-second gif?

psycho gif


Posted: 1st, July 2013 | In: Film | Comment

21 Movie Barcodes – classic films in a single image

MOVIE Barcode compresses all the frames of a movie into a single picture. Can you tell the films apart? Yes. If you look hard enough what at first appeared specious, gets to be intriguing. Those aren’t swatches of 1970s raffia wallpaper. Those are films. 


When Harry Met Sally
movie bar codes

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Posted: 29th, June 2013 | In: Film | Comment