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Mof Gimmers

Mof Gimmers - Author Archive

Is Jane Austen Too Airbrushed On The New Banknote?

THE Bank of England decided that they needed to get some women involved on our currency. The hooters and sneerers pointed out that The Queen was pretty ubiquitous on our … (read more)

Posted: 5th, November 2013 | In: Money, Reviews | Comment

Do We Want To Bring Back Morph?

IN a move that normally grates – as in, famous entity starting a Kickstarter campaign, which seems a bit unfair when not-famous folk are trying to get projects off the … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2013 | In: Reviews, TV & Radio | Comment

How Much Would You Buy Someone’s Virginity For? Shatuniha Is Asking £17,000 (Photos)

VIRGINITY. A weird notion. A name given to something you haven’t done yet. Imagine if everything we hadn’t done had a special word. Is there a designated word for someone … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2013 | In: Money, Reviews, Strange But True | Comments (4)

Arsenal Fans Will Enjoy This String Of Incredible Misses

ARSENAL may be having a ball in the Premier League at the moment, but what about their Argentinian namesakes? Well, Arsenal de Sarandi have also had a decent start to the … (read more)

Posted: 4th, November 2013 | In: Arsenal, Sports | Comment

You Can Now Buy Back To The Future Style Hoverboards

PEOPLE have long moaned that, now we live in the future, where are our hoverboards? Well, glad you asked because some bright spark has decided to do something about it!

ZBoard … (read more)

Posted: 1st, November 2013 | In: Film, The Consumer | Comment

Prince George To Find Out Just How Peculiar Human Beings Are

HE might be only 3 months old, but shitting hell, Prince George is on a steep learning curve to find out how bizarre the human race is.

Today, third in line … (read more)

Posted: 1st, November 2013 | In: Royal Family | Comment

Good Riddance To Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? A Pointless Spectacle Of Greed

FIFTEEN years ago – and it seems much, much longer than that – Who Wants To Be a Millionaire? first aired on our screens. And now, it is set to end … (read more)

Posted: 1st, November 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

CSKA Moscow Guilty Of Racist Chants Against Manchester City’s Yaya Youre… What Next FIFA?

UEFA has imposed a partial stadium closure over at CSKA Moscow after fans were found to have indulged in racist chants when playing Manchester City at the Arena Khimki.

When CSKA play … (read more)

Posted: 31st, October 2013 | In: Sports | Comment

Why People Moaning About Susan Boyle And Elvis Are Stupid And Wrong

PART-TIME music snobs have been tutting and sighing about the imminent Christmas single featuring both Susan Boyle and Elvis. They think Elvis represents something sanctified and Boyle, something awful. These … (read more)

Posted: 31st, October 2013 | In: Music | Comments (5)

Arsenal And Liverpool Players Top List Of 7 Awful Premier League Haircuts

FOOTBALLERS, bless ’em, haven’t worked out the ideal formula involving brains, fashion and money. Everyone remembers Liverpool’s white FA Cup suits and eyebrows were raised when Davey Beckham wore a … (read more)

Posted: 30th, October 2013 | In: Fashion, Sports | Comment

Star Wars Blooper Reel Turns Op Online

STAR WARS is a film that is extraordinarily well documented and new stuff shows up all the time. However, one of the best finds is this original blooper reel from Star … (read more)

Posted: 29th, October 2013 | In: Film | Comment

Animals: They’re All Thieves, Especially These Ducks, Seagulls, Sealions And Dogs

EVERYONE thinks animals are so wonderful and they’re not. They’re poo machines who think of humans as elaborate tin-openers and dung shovelers. And we’re stupid enough to believe they care … (read more)

Posted: 29th, October 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Rocketman: Tom Hardy To Play Obvious Doppelganger, Elton John (Eddie Murphy Busy)

IF you were given the job of finding an actor who looked like Elton John, one of the last people you’d choose was Tom Hardy. You’d inevitably go for Eddie … (read more)

Posted: 28th, October 2013 | In: Celebrities, Film, Music | Comment

FIFA To Investigate Flares But Probably Not Racism

AS everyone knows, FIFA are a bunch of clowns. They’re like local councillors raiding the buffet car and talking about golf swings while property developers build a car park on … (read more)

Posted: 25th, October 2013 | In: Sports | Comment

French Football Cancels Matches To Protest Against Tax

GETTING footballers to show any sort of excitement, opinion or passion for anything is nigh on impossible. All over the world, they talk in monotone voices, all the life trained … (read more)

Posted: 24th, October 2013 | In: Money, Sports | Comment

All Hail President Klitschko! And First Lady Hayden Panettiere!

BOXERS usually don’t quite know what to do with themselves after the hang their gloves up, and usually end up back in the ring too old, too hittable, and get … (read more)

Posted: 24th, October 2013 | In: Politicians, Sports | Comment

Panicky Groom Jailed For Wedding Bomb Hoax

WOMEN who say ‘all men are pigs’ or ‘men are stupid’ want following around with a machine that makes an irritating noise for the rest of their lives.

However, some men … (read more)

Posted: 22nd, October 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment

Sorry Homophobes But Gay Love Is Totally Natural (Educated Bees Do It)

BIRDS do it. Bees do it. Even educated fleas do it. Do what? Gay sex or, to give it the correct term ‘sex’.

All those homophobes who think the whole things … (read more)

Posted: 22nd, October 2013 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment

Ohio State Perform Greatest Moonwalk In History!

WHILE Michael Jackson didn’t invent the Moonwalk, he absolutely popularised it, took it global, mastered it and became as famous as the music he made.

Trying to top MJ’s moves is … (read more)

Posted: 21st, October 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment

Devil Cat Tells Woman To ‘Go AWAY’

WHO needs Doctor Doolittle when you have animals that can talk English? That’s what one lady was faced with in Dublin after her kitchen was invaded by a Devil Cat.

‘Caroline … (read more)

Posted: 20th, October 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment

Vinyl Music Sales At A 10 Year High

VINYL bores are a terrible, terrible thing. However, some nice news is that vinyl sales are at a 10 year high. Driving demand are releases from Daft Punk, Arctic Monkeys and … (read more)

Posted: 17th, October 2013 | In: Music, The Consumer | Comment

WTFifa? Even Though They Haven’t Qualified For 16 years, Colombia Seeded Above Italy And Holland

ALL football fans know that FIFA are beyond farce. They fine racist clubs the equivalent of lunch money while doling out huge penalties to people who divert from their sponsors … (read more)

Posted: 17th, October 2013 | In: Sports | Comment

English Football Is A Brat Factory: Manchester United and West Ham Prospects Row

IN the England Under-21 game against Lithuania, the Three Lions ran out 5-0 and that would’ve been something to celebrate. However, there’s something troubling – is English football little more than … (read more)

Posted: 17th, October 2013 | In: Sports | Comment

10 people who can replace Gary Barlow on the X Factor

SO, Gary Barlow is quitting The X Factor is he? Naturally, that’s the most exciting thing that’s actually happened during this year’s oddly tedious talent show.

After three years as a … (read more)

Posted: 15th, October 2013 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comments (2)

Watch a weatherman eat cat vomit, live on air

AN American news report took a turn for the worse when a weatherman ate cat puke live on air. Weatherman Scot Haney made viewers recoil in horror when he ignored the … (read more)

Posted: 14th, October 2013 | In: Strange But True, TV & Radio | Comment

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