Anorak

Tabloids | Anorak - Part 20

Tabloids Category

The news as told by the UK’s tabloid press – The Sun, Daily Express, Daily Mail, Daily Mirror, Daily Star and News of the World.

Brexit: absurd MPs vote on the vote and Remainers side with rich old elites to fight democracy

How’s the Brexit vote getting along? A few weeks ago (It was June 23rd – ed), the people democratically voted for the country to leave the undemocratic European Union. Today the Daily Express leads with “HOORAY! MP SAY YES TO EU EXIT”. Like you, we’re a little puzzled. Didn’t the demos, the great unwashed, say ‘yes’ to the EU exit with that vote? The MPs had their say in the run up to the referendum. Now they’ve had it again, and the democratically elected members who represent us have voted in the Commons by 461 votes to 89 in favour of democracy.

The Express, which has cheered for Brexit and UKIP, is delighted. By the end of March the Government will finally trigger Article 50, the move needed to get Britain out of the European Union, and the MPs will not attempt to block it.

 

brexit

 

And the country is in favour. A YouGov last week reveals that 68 per cent of people want Britain to get on with Brexit.

On page 4, we read that the 372 majority vote not to block the will of the people “does not have the force of law”. The Express then points the finger at the “89 MPs who lined up to defy the will of the people”. Er, no. They all did. They voted on something they had no right to vote on. We already did the voting. The entire exercise was about them validating themselves not about the referendum.

The Mail is equally chuffed with this absurdity. It was the “DAY MPS SPOKE FOR BRITAIN,” declares the newspaper’s front page. The paper says Labour was “thrown into chaos” when 23 of its MPs refused to commit to the Brexit timetable. Labour is already in chaos. The party lost the plot when it created surveillance Britain, invaded Iraq and Afghanistan, belittled the working class, approved a hierarchy of foreign people and acquiesced to racism.

“We’re the insurgents now,” says former Labour leader and PM Tony Blair. He and the 48% are the rebels? If they are look out for British politicians tuning the other way when Russians bomb them. But they’re nothing of the sort. You can’t spot the 48%. There is no popular movement. As we’ve seen, the vast majority of voters back democracy and just want Brexit done. The people rather like and value democracy; the clubby elected reps less so.

 

brexit daily mail

 

It’s “ARTICLE 50 SHADES of HOORAY,” says the Sun.

On its Page 2, the Mirror spots “lone Tory Ken Clarke” with the 23 Labour “rebels”, the LibDems and the SNP. So much for the 48%.

Meanwhile, over at the Supreme Court, Remainers are hoping rich petitioners backed by a shibboleth of old toffs – Gina Miller, her pals and the judges – render the referendum result useless. Indeed, readers, the people who bemoaned the rich and the old men and women in the street voting Leave now hope the rich and the old men and women wrapped in wigs and dead animals let them stay.

How’s that for elitism?

Posted: 8th, December 2016 | In: Politicians, Reviews, Tabloids | Comment (1)


There’s No One Quite Like Piers Morgan: Cruz Beckham and deprived kids attacked over cynical stunt

David and Victoria Beckham “pimped out Cruz for Xmas,” declares the Daily Star. The 11-year-old has released a Christmas single. And morning TV presenter Piers Morgan is aghast. Morgan says the “sickening” and “cynical” single is a “tool” to “boost Brand Beckham”.

Consider it boosted. On page 3, there’s more on Cruz and his new manager, a bloke called Scooter who also manages Justin Bieber.

 

pimp-cruz-beckham

 

The Mirror leads with “Too young?”, inviting readers to consider if the world needs another child singing sensation with a Christmas hit. Wasn’t the St Winifred’s School Choir’s seasonal smash hit There’s No One Quite Like Grandma enough?

Over pages 14 and 15, the Mirror asks, “Is it too soon for Cruz Beckham to be a Spice Boy?”

As the Mirror considers the 11-year-old’s career to date – miracle birth; being given a surname for a first name; growing hair; 7 times table – deep in the story we learn that Cruz is doing it for charity. Proceeds from his song will help disadvantaged young children.

Would you see Cruz silenced and the bairns go without? It’s not about him. It’s about them. Although it might really be about Piers Morgan.

 

Posted: 8th, December 2016 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids | Comment


Transfer balls: Arsenal trigger bidding war as Chelsea and China chase Alexis Sanchez

Arsenal forwards Alexis Sanchez is on his way to Chelsea. Maybe. The Mirror leads with news that should Arsenal fails to give Sanchez the massive pay hike he wants, Chelsea will dip him, his dog, his mum and his house in Russian gold.

The root of this story is not guessology, but something close to it. The Mirror says Chelsea manager Antonio Conte really likes Sanchez, arguably the Premier League’s best player. And, er, that’s it.

 

Alexis Sanchez chelsea arsenal

 

This ‘news’ follows yesterday’s ‘news’ that Chinese investors are willing to spirit Sanchez to the Far East an pay him £400,000-a-week to kick a ball. You’d imagine that any club willing to pay that much will also pay an enormous transfer fee.

As Arsenal wonder what Sanchez is worth if someone is willing to pay him £50m a year, the rest of the media slavishly follow the Mirror’s fact-free scoop:

“Arsenal and Chelsea fans lose their minds on Twitter as Sanchez is linked with Blues move” – Express

“Chelsea prepare swoop for Alexis Sanchez amid contract stalemate” – IBTimes

“Chelsea chase Gunners superstar Alexis” – The Sun

Of course, we only know about the Chinese interest because Sanchez’s people have dropped it into conversation with Arsenal over a new deal. It’s a bit desperate from them. If he fancies it, he’d already have agreed to go and Arsenal would be talking about that massive transfer fee.

So Sanchez won’t head to China. He’ll stay in Europe, and if he and Arsenal are smart he’ll stay at the Emirates and earn closer to the £200,000 a week he wants.

 

Posted: 8th, December 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Chelsea, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Making an ‘ordeal’ over Matt Le Tissier’s naked massage

Former Southampton FC “legend” Matt Le Tissier is the latest name linked to the stories of historical sexual abuse in football. Le Tissier claims he was given a “naked massage” by former youth team coach Bob Higgins. The Sun says “at least six Southampton starlets” have made complaints about former Saints youth team coach Bob Higgins.

The Mail leads with “LE TISSIER: MY NAKED ORDEAL”. Says Le Tissier to the BBC: “Everyone was kind of naked and getting thrown on this bed…and a very quick  massage. It was uncomfortable.” He adds: “You look back and it was wrong.”

It does sound odd and unnerving. But to put it in the same bracket as the horrors endured by victims of people like child abuser and former football coach Barry Bennell is also odd. Le Tissier never says he was abused. He tweets: “For the record, I’ve never felt like I’ve been abused. Still don’t… I’m all good just state what happened.”

The moment has not defined his life. Was it an ordeal? The papers all agree with the Mail that it was.

 

le-tissier-ordeal daily mail th esun

 

The Daily Star’s front-page headline yells “Matt nude ‘rub’ anger”. Inside we read, “Le Tiss Ordeal Fury.”

Does Le Tissier sound angry or furious? Not at all. He sounds measured and thoughtful.  “It’s pretty disgusting,” he says. “What went on is not normal behaviour. When you hear the stories of naked soapy massages, hairy bum competitions… you look back at it now and think ‘hang on, what was going on?’. Obviously boys talk at that age, they take the Mickey, it kind of gets covered up as a bit of banter at that stage. But as you grow into an adult, you look at it and think ‘that’s not right’.”

The Sun leads with: “Matt Le Tissier BombShell – Youth coach gave me disgusting naked massage.”

Over pages 54 and 55, readers are told of the “SAINTS LEGEND’S ORDEAL”.

The media all agree: it was an ordeal.

On the Mirror’s front page we see Le Tissier. On Page 11, down in paragraph 5, we read: “Le Tissier said he never felt like he’d been abused.” He’s a victim but unaware he was one? The Sun goes further: “Le Tissier  said he was not abused.”

 

le-tissier-ordeal daily mail th esun

 

Having read of Le Tissier’s “ordeal”, over pages 74 and 75, the Mail says, “90 minutes in dark room with coach still haunts me.” We hear from former Southampton youth team player Les Cleevely. What happened to him in that room should be the matter for the police, not for our titillation? “Les Cleevely does not elaborate greatly on what happened during one and a half hours in a darkened room with… Bob Higgins, but the affect it had on his life is profound,” says the paper.

It’s not until paragraph twelve that we get to know about Higgins’ alleged crimes. In 1992, he was “cleared of sexual abuse charges”. The Mail says he has “declined to comment on the latest claims surrounding paedophilia in football, but denies all allegations of abuse”.

We are told that at age 13, Cleevely claims he was given “a soapy massage by Higgins”. Les Cleevely then says: “My hour-and-a-half experience in a dark room was horrendous in itself but to have anything else happen is the stuff of nightmares.”

We are left fearing and imagining, but not knowing.

And the fear is fanned and spread by Harry Redknapp. “Rumours were going round at that time and there was a programme I watched where this young guy spoke about Bob Higgins and the type of stuff he was dong with kids at Southampton and I thought that would be the end of him,” says Redknapp. The paper then adds, ‘Redknapp was adamant there “must have been people at Saints who heard rumours about Higgins”.’

But through the fog of suspicion settling on everyone at Southampton FC, Redknapp then adds: “But until you can actually prove something or there’s a bit of evidence, it’s very difficult.”

Well, yes. Claims need to be investigated. Barriers to justice, charges, trials and verdicts navigated. What we have is suspicion. We are being invited to mistrust everyone. What happened in those 90 minutes should be in the hands of the police.

What we want is to get to the truth and for justice to be done and seen to be done – not for everyone who has ever worked in football to be a suspect.

Posted: 7th, December 2016 | In: Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Media balls: BBC blamed for Manchester United and Manchester City hype

In “MANCS FOR NOTHING”, the Mirror’s Dave Kidd looks at how Manchester United and Manchester City have failed to live up to the hype.

“Remember all that Pep Guardiola v Jose Mourinho hype,” he begins. We do.

“Remember how Manchester became the undisputed centre of the football universe?” We do.

Kidd then tells us who we can blame for all that balls. “Maybe we were all sucked in by the famously agenda-driven Manchester-centric media, led by Salford- based BBC Sport, who persuaded us to ignore poor unfashionable London”.

Kidd tell us that the biased media ignored Chelsea boss Antonio Conte, whose side are top of the Premier League.

To which we ask one question of our own: is the Mirror part of the Manchester-centric media?

September 5 2016: The Mirror asked: “Jose and Pep are set to renew acquaintances… but is the Manchester derby the world’s biggest?

September 8: “It’s his first Manchester derby, and even at this early stage it’s a game that could have a bearing on the outcome of the Premier League.”

September 8: “Jose Mourinho and Pep Guardiola have made Manchester derby even bigger.”

September 9: “Clash of the titans: Pep vs Mou XVII.”

With just over 24 hours now until kick-off, Mourinho and Guardiola clash once again in one of modern football’s most engrossing rivalries in recent times.

Throughout the rest of the day we will be reminding you of the past encounters between the Special One and the master of tiki-taka as they bid for supremacy in both Manchester and the Premier League.

September 10: “Manchester City’s derby display proved why we are so lucky to have bewitching Pep Guardiola in English football.”

September 16: “I believe City are English football’s best hope of winning the Champions League this season – that’s mainly because of the Pep factor.”

 

manchester-daily-mirror MAnchester United Manchester City

manchester city manchester united daily mirror

What no Conte?

 

Expect more hype as soon as City and United start winning matches again.

Posted: 6th, December 2016 | In: Back pages, Manchester City, manchester united, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Scarlett Moffatt: the fix, the fake, the OK! wedding and shoes you can see your titties in

Now that Scarlett Moffatt is a bonafide celebrity on account of her victory in I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here!, instead of just a ‘normal’ young woman watching them on the Gogglebox telly, the tabloids set about here. Over pages 4 and 5, the Star labels Scarlett a “Fake”. “Lift selfies show champ was milking it big time,” says one headline. “Queen Scarlett Faked Her Fear,” thunders another.

 

scarlett moffatt

 

Scarlett Moffatt and Vicky Pattison have “kicked off a fierce rivalry” we’re told. How so? “Last year’s winner  [that’s Vicky] was blasted for ‘plonking’ the crown on new queen Scarlett’s head.” And that’s not all. At the after show party Vicky and Scarlett “were not snapped together”.

Having positioned two young women as catty rivals – plus ca change – the Star then turns to the fakery. “Apparently pictures of Scarlett in a lift prove she was faking it when she told her “celebrity pals throughout the show she had a phobia of confined spaces”.  You might argue that being “sealed inside a coffin like space” and “covered in creepy-crawlies” is not quite the same as pouting in a lift. But Scarlett is quoted as having said: “I feel I can do this because I might finally be able to go in lifts.”

Like Tom Cruise’s lifts, what goes up, will eventually come down, so we get news that this is “the latest in a string of claims that the show was fixed in her favour.” You mean it’s edited? You mean it’s not a fly on the gonads slice of life? You mean focusing on the single young woman gets more viewers than listening to the sixty-something bit-part EastEnders actor moaning at the needy middle-aged bloke off the mid-morning property show?

I mean would Danny Baker be subject to the Sun’s front-page headline, “I’ll spend winnings on caravan and new boobs”? Says Danny, sorry Scarlett: “Now thats I’ve lost weight, and my titties are cleaning my shoes, I would like them lifted to where they are meant to be.” All over Page 3?

And on the Mirror’s Page 1, where the boring bloke whose girlfriend shagged John Terry (allegedly), sorry, Scarlett is talking of her fantasy “Willy Wonka wedding”.  She wants a wedding just like Jordan and Peter Andre’s do. Yeh, she wants OK! to pay for it.

Of course Scarlett was installed as ITV’s preferred winner. The rest of them were a mixture of man-children, TV-creations with lower profiles than a soup spoon and dullards. As the Sun says, out of 500 visits to the Bush Telegraph room, “whip-smart” Scarlett made 104 of them. She talked to us. And we enjoyed listening to her.

Posted: 6th, December 2016 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Tabloids | Comment


Scarlett Moffatt on her way to marriage, a first million and tabloid fame

scarlett moffatt

Ant is delighted

 

“Find out what Scarlett Moffat will not next,” says the Daily Star on its front page. Judging by the picture of the Googlebox star and now I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! winner in her bra and knickers, we’d says ‘put some cloths on’ or ‘catch a cold’. On page 4 and 5, Scarlett is a “Celebridey”. Aha! She’s going to get married!

Scarlett Moffatt is “heading down the aisle”, says the paper in an “exclusive”. Well, it is to anyone not following Luke Crodden, Scarlett’s boyfriend, on twittter, and didn’t see him tweet: “I think I wanna marry you @ScarlettMoffatt.” If that was a proposal, it’s one Scarlett didn’t see on account of her being in a televised jungle clearing with neither phone signal nor phone.

The Mirror, which also leads with Scarlett, says she’s in line for a £1m deal. In an “exclusive” Halina Watts, says Scarlett has “revealed her big plan for the future – to team up with Ant and Dec. Imagine handing out with those  boys all day and having a laugh,”says Scarlett, exclusively in the Mirror. “I’d love it.”

That’s not all that exclusive to Daily Star readers who read the exact same dream on November 22, then billed as her “threesome” with Ant and Dec. Scarlett fans will have read that before when she said it in her book published last April.

 

scarlett moffatt

Exclusive – Daily Mirror December 5 2016

 

 

Scarlett Moffatt threesome I'm A Celebrity

Not exclusive – Daily Star November 22, 2016

 

Over in the Star, we read that Scarlett is due to earn £1m in endorsements and TV deals. As well she might. Last year’s I’m A Celebrity winner Vicky Pattison told the Mirror in March 2016: “I’ve just about hit the 7-figure mark for the first time. But I’m being wise with my money. I’ve been very well advised and I’m turning myself into a bit of a property tycoon.”

Find out what Scarlett does next by visiting her local estate agency.

Posted: 5th, December 2016 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Reviews, Tabloids | Comment


Madeleine McCann: four months to find her, kidnapped to order and important news

Madeleine McCann: a look at reporting on the missing child.

Having led with “important” news on the hunt for the missing child only yesterday, the Sun makes not a single mention of the child. The Express, however, leads with the story on its cover. “NEW TWIST IN POLICE HUNT FOR MADELEINE McCANN,” declares the paper, the words hanging by a familiar picture of the child.

On Page 7, we get to the news. Below stories about Scarlett Moffatt winning I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! and a new treatment for Parkinson’s disease, we read: “Did people-traffickers snatch Maddy?” To which the only sensible answer is: Dunno. Did they?

New funding for the police search for Madeleine McCann will investigate a tip that she could have been kidnapped by people smugglers. The child “may have been  photographed with her parents son the beach by a ‘spotter’ for a gang,” says the paper. Or may not have been. We don’t know. It’s a theory. A “police source” is quoted: “It raises hope that she could still be alive.” After that a “friend” of Madeleine’s parents Kate and Gerry McCann is quoted: “There is definite hard evidence that this is happening and they have looked into the fact someone was targeting children and may well have been sterling children to order.”

 

mccann madeleine

 

In the Star, on Page 15, readers are told, “MADDIE: 4 MOTHS TO FIND HER.” That’s how long British police have been given to locate the child who vanished in May 2007. The paper says “detectives have changed their minds about what happened “. They no longer believe she was “snatched by burglars during botched raids on the family’s holiday apartment”. They now think child-traffickers may be behind the disappearance. A “source”  unnamed, as ever – says this is the “last roll of the dice”.

It’s the “last chance” to find the child, says the Mail on its page 14. Police want to “work out if she was kidnapped to order”. The paper adds that “no trace of her has ever been found”. Readers are told that the parents “were ultimately forced to raise funds for teams of private detective to chase a barrage of often spurious tip-offs”. And that the the “child trafficking theory was first raised in 2007 by private detectives who believed there could have been gang ‘spotters’ working on the resort.”

Believed. Could. But no facts.

As for four months to find the child, the Mail says when the public funding for the police search ends on April 1 2017, more money will be provided if “investigators have evidence that the few remaining leads are worth pursuing”.

Madeleine McCann went missing in 2007. Such are the facts.

Posted: 5th, December 2016 | In: Madeleine McCann, Reviews, Tabloids | Comment


Daily Mail laments Norbert Hofer’s defeat?

Do you want the good news or the good news? Norbert Hofer, leader of Austria’s far-right Freedom Party, will not be the county’s next president. He polled less votes than Alexander Van der Bellen.

The Mail call it “humiliation” for Hofer, whose party, it reminds readers, was “formed by a former SS commander”. He was Anton Reinthaller, a former SS brigade leader and Nazi Minister of Agriculture, who formed the party in 1956. Lest you think having one old Nazi has leader an accident, Reinthaller was succeeded in 1958 by Friedrich Peter – another former SS member.

Anyhow, the Freedom Party didn’t loose by all that much; as the Mail says, “almost half the electorate, backed him”.

Is the Mail a tad disappointed?

 

Norbert Hofer

 

Hofer wasn’t set to kick out immigrants. He was all set to give the European Union a kicking. Pity the spirit of the SS lost, right?

 

Posted: 5th, December 2016 | In: Politicians, Reviews, Tabloids | Comment


Madeleine McCann: the ‘important lead’, unnamed sources and sexual exploitation

Madeleine McCann: a look at reporting on the missing child.

The Sun (front page): ” MADDIE GANG PROBE Cops given cash to probe ‘important’ new lead that Maddie was snatched by people trafficking gang.”

Important enough for the paper’s front page – but not ‘important’ enough to avoid those inverted commas.

The rest of the Press follow the Sun’s lead.

The Mirror: ‘Madeleine McCann cops chasing ‘important new lead’ as investigation reaches “last roll of the dice”.’

The Indy: “Scotland Yard set to investigate ‘important’ new lead in disappearance of Madeleine McCann.”

Daily Mail: “Scotland Yard given extra funding to probe ‘important’ new lead over theory that Madeleine McCann was kidnapped by trafficking gang.”

It’s important. Maybe.

Over pages 4 and 5, readers are told more.

The development is being taken so seriously that senior Whitehall officials have been briefed by the Met on its progress.

Well, the hunt for the missing child has cost a lot of public money. Maybe the bean counters are worried about a lack of value for their investment?

And what of the breakthrough?

Detectives are following a tip that a gang of European traffickers snatched the tot after taking pictures of her. It could end up proving that she is still alive, nearly ten years after she vanished.

Everyone sane would like this story to have a happy ending. But how can anything prove the child is alive other than her being found?

As with so much to do with this story, an unnamed source is quoted:

A source said: “This is an important new line of inquiry which could provide an explanation on whether Madeleine was abducted and transported away. It raises hope that she could still be alive.”

Surely we only know if the new tip is important if it comes up with evidence that explains what happened to Madeleine McCann.

Retired Yard detective Colin Sutton said the extra money for the last line of inquiry means “there must be something worthwhile”.

Who needs evidence when you’re a retired detective?

The Sun adds: “Reports following Madeleine’s disappearance suggested she could have been taken to Belgium or Morocco in North Africa.”

But we have seen no evidence that she was.

But this is interesting:

The Met’s clubs and vice unit received a tip that the ring had placed an order for a “young girl” just three days before Madeleine went missing. Leicestershire Police, who at that point led the Operation Task effort to help find Madeleine, were also informed.

Is there any evidence to support the story?

In 2011, police in Portugal smashed a trafficking ring snatching young women and underage girls in the Algarve and Aveiro, in the north of the country.

The Portugal Resident has more:

An operation to crack down on human trafficking has led to the arrests of 12 men identified as being part of a criminal network in the Algarve and Aveiro, in the north of Portugal.The ring is believed to be responsible for the sexual exploitation of many young women in the Algarve, some of them underage, who were being coerced into acting as prostitutes in the region

Go on:

During the operation, 30 Romanian women were identified as possible victims of human trafficking.

The SEF, Portugal’s immigration and border service, added:

“The movement of the prostitutes between different networks hindered the police and judicial authorities in being able to conduct a criminal investigation but authorities in Spain, Italy, the UK and Germany cooperated with us with the assistance of Europol in this case.”

Algarve Social Democrat (PSD) MP Mendes Bota was unimpressed with the suspects’ treatment:

Speaking to Lusa News Agency on Monday this week, Mendes Bota claimed that, “a few days after they were arrested”, the majority of the individuals detained by SEF Immigration Officers during the February bust “were released by a judge who decided that they should await their trial, who knows when [the trial will commence], unrestrained.”

We can’t find any news on any trail.

Such are the facts.

 

Posted: 4th, December 2016 | In: Madeleine McCann, Reviews, Tabloids | Comment


Arsenal balls: Ralph Hasenhuttl has not replaced Arsene Wenger

As headlines go, the Sun’s is unequivocal: “RALPH HAS THE JOB”. The paper reports that Arsene Wenger is to replaced as Arsenal manager by Ralph Hasenhuttl. Reading on, we get more facts: “Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger to be replaced by RB Leipzig coach Ralph Hasenhuttl.”

Wow! Wenger’s finally been given the heave-ho.

As Gunners fans look up Hasenhuttl, the Sun whispers, “Austrian sensationally confirms he could takeover the Gunners.”

Could?

The Sun adds: “Austrian chief, who has led his side to the top of the Bundesliga table, claims he may take over at the Emirates next season.”

May?

The facts that had Arsenal fans excited are now less than factual.

So how did the Sun gets the story? Well, the Austrian appears to have seen q story in the Sun that he’s bene linked to the Arsenal job and responded:

“It was a well-researched story. There was a lot of truth to it. I have heard of worse fates than succeeding the longest-serving manager in England. It’s not damaging my reputation, is it? We don’t have to put too much thought into [the Arsenal job]. I have found my luck here.”

Which bits contained truth and which bits contained non-truths, Hasenhuttl didn’t say.

Posted: 2nd, December 2016 | In: Arsenal, Back pages, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


On Daily Mail migrants from Barcelona and Andrew Sachs

In its front-page farewell to Andrew Sachs, known chiefly for his work as Manuel, the well-intentioned and hapless Spanish waiter in Fawlty Towers, the Mail juxtaposes the actor’s portrait by the news “MIGRANT NUMBERS HIT NEW RECORDS”.

 

andrew sachs daily mail

 

The Mail fails to say how many migrants hail from Barcelona.

PS: Andrew Sachs was born in Berlin in 1930.

Posted: 2nd, December 2016 | In: Celebrities, Reviews, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment


Tabloid Questions: Daily Mail weather forecasting swans go for third time lucky

Tabloid Questions – a look at headline-making questions in the national Press.

On Tuesday November 29, the Daily Mail asked: “Have swans predicted a mild winter?” The long-necked birds haven’t been presenting the wether on cable telly in Norwegian or otherwise. The Mail says swans have been forecasting the weather by arriving in the UK later than usual, a move “often interpreted as a sign of a mild winter to come”.

Often indeed.

 

swans-daily-mail

 

In 2007, the Mail asked: “Does the swans’ early arrival mean we’re in for an icy winter?” Said the paper:

The migrating Siberian swans have landed early this year, heralding harsh weather ahead.

Was it harsh? The Met Office told us:

December 2007 saw close to average daily mean temperatures over the UK, with January and February 2008 recording well above average temperatures.

In 2015, the Mail reported:

 

daily mail swans weather

 

… while the magnificent bird was probably relieved to reach the warmer climes of the UK, its arrival – the earliest in 50 years – may well usher in a particularly harsh and unforgiving winter.

Was the winter especially harsh? The Met Office tells us:

Winter 2015/16 was third-warmest for the UK in a series from 1910, behind the winters of 1989 and 2007. For England and Wales, it was the warmest winter in the series.

So have swans predicted a mild winter?

Still not sure? Maybe the Mail can help us to answer the question?

 

daily mail weather swan

 

In conclusion: never trust a Russian swan when you’re picking your winter coat.

Such are the facts.

Posted: 2nd, December 2016 | In: Key Posts, Reviews, Tabloids | Comment


Chelsea embroiled in football abuse story short on facts

The Mirror leads with the “FOOTY Paedophile Scandal”. We hear from former Chelsea player Gary Johnson, who says he was paid £50,000 last year to keep quiet about the abuse he suffered at the hands of a club scout in the 1970s.

Over pages 4,5,6, and 7, Gary Johnson claims he was sexually assaulted by Chelsea scout Eddie Heath “hundreds of times in three years”.

Eddie Heath is dead.

Says Johnson of Chelsea: “I think that they were paying me to keep a lid on this.” If they did, will Chelsea be asking for their money back? Johnson says Chelsea “asked him to sign a gagging order”. “They may have paid others for their silence,” he adds. We then learn that Chelsea “waived the clause in Gary’s settlement banning him from speaking about abuse after details of his claim were leaked to the media.”

Did Chelsea know Johnson was being abused in 1973 when he was a 13-year-old at the club, continuing until Gary was “around 16 or 17 and happened two or three times a week”, as he says?

Gary Johnson says Heath got him to perform in threesomes with other boys, “so I know there are mother victims out there.” He adds: “it is now up to them if they come forward”.

Do we expect them to?

Brendan O’Neill writes:

In these post-Savile times, we’ve come to think that all former victims of child abuse have some kind of responsibility to parade their wounds. We have come to expect, somewhat greedily, even perversely, that the abuse of decades ago must be relived, as publicly as possibly, in order to ‘raise awareness’. I’m sorry, but I think it’s possible there’s an element of moral titillation to all this. And I think it’s possible that it makes abuse victims even less likely to get over their experiences by making them go through it all again for our viewing or reading pleasure.

We learn that in 2014, Gary Johnson contacted the Met Police’s Operation Yewtree. He says he was “advised to go back to Chelsea with his case”. The police palmed him off to the club? If so, that’s abhorrent. Did they investigate? We’re not told. Mr Johnson says the “Professional Footballers’ Association did not return his calls”. So he contacted lawyers, who asked Chelsea for compensation.

Says Gary Johnson: “What makes me so angry is that I went to them to say I had been abused an they basically said, ‘prove it’,” Was that wrong of them? Chelsea are no longer owned by the Mears family, as they were in the 1970s. Why should the new owners take anything on face value alone when a man is asking for money and claiming to have been the victim of heinous crimes by a former employee? Gary Johnson says Chelsea’s “attitude when I came forward was to sweep it under the carpet”.

His claim was supported by Roger Kennedy, who says: “Mr Johnson has been haunted by the abuse for most of his life, but the intensity of the flashbacks have increased since he has become more aware of the nature of what happened due to the publicity around Jimmy Savile.”

 

chelsea-abuse-football

 

The Mirror is quick to blame the club, saying Chelsea used its “financial might to cover up abuse”. It is the “tip of the iceberg”. Did Chelsea behave badly? All we know of the money and the deal is that Mr Johnson says: “I think that they were paying me to keep a lid on this.”

The Mirror says the story “implies they [Chelsea] cared more about commercial rights and sponsorship deals than helping survivors cope with the torment of abuse”. The paper says Chelsea are “morally questionable”.

What of the police, then, and the PFA, two institutions Mr Johnson says failed him? What of the lawyers who accepted an worked on the deal?

Writing in the Mail, Martin Samuel confronts the matter of a club’s role. He says the current Chelsea owners are part of the club’s heritage.

Yes, the sport is different now. Yes, stricter protocols and procedures are in place, and those in charge of youth development may protest that the past is a foreign country. But it isn’t.

Modern clubs must assume responsibility, be the custodians for all those years. Everything, from the fanbase, to the location, to modern revenue streams, and items in glass cases that directors view with pride, they owe to those ancient dates and what followed. And much of it may have been good.

But what isn’t, what is almost too poisonous to contemplate, cannot be disowned.

When you buy a club, you buy the heritage, the good and the bad.

It’s a shame we don’t know the full terms of Mr Johnson’s deal and how the £50,000 sum was agreed upon. Chelsea are investigating. Hopefully, Chelsea will be transparent and we will know more soon. Dare they be anything but? The Mail leads with the headline: “FA VOW TO HIT CHELSEA HARD.” Any club “who have given a child abuse victim hush money will be punished”. Chelsea are “in the dock”, says the paper. The club may well ask, “On what charge?”

By way of a footnote, the Mirror says Eddie Heath trained Barry Bennell, the convicted paedophile, when he was a 14-year-old at Chelsea. The Mirror says there is “no suggestion” Bennell was a victim of Heath’s.

Heath is dead. Also dead is Frank Roper, a man who former footballer Paul Stewart says abused him “every day for four years”. Gary Johnson says Paul Stewart encouraged him to tell his story.

We can expert to hear others.

Posted: 2nd, December 2016 | In: Chelsea, Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Camelot hackers make Daily Star readers worry more than most

The Star once more leads with Lotto news. And as ever it’s bad news. “Lottery site hacked, it could be you,” warns the front-page headline. The story goes that hackers have “stolen” the passwords of 26,000 people registered with the National Lottery’s website – “Dozens had email addresses and passwords stolen”. It looks like they did. But the theft did not occur on the Lotto site.

 

daily-star-lotto-hack

 

‘Experts say it could have “serious consequences” for those who use online bank accounts,” says the paper. Why the Star should lead with this story can have nothing to do with the fact that it’s owned by Richard Desmond – the Press baron who also owns the Health Lottery, a rival to the Lotto.

The Mirror has a slightly different angle on the same story:

Thousands of National Lottery players’ accounts are feared to have been hacked after Camelot confirmed “suspicious activity”. Around 26,500 accounts fear to have been compromised after the log-in details were accessed by a third party. Camelot claims it doesn’t believe it’s own system was hacked, but that the details were taken from elsewhere. It added that no money has been withdrawn or added to any accounts.

 

daily-star-lotto-hack

 

And in the Guardian, we get this:

About 26,500 National Lottery players are facing compulsory password resets on their online accounts after they were apparently accessed by cybercriminals.

Camelot, the firm that operates the game, said it had become aware of “suspicious activity on a very small proportion” of accounts, and it was now taking steps to understand what had happened. Logins may have been stolen from other websites where players use the same details, it said.

Far be it for us to stick up for the greedy, kak-handed so-and-sos at Camelot, but it’s useful to have all the facts.

Says Camelot:

We would like to make clear that there has been no unauthorised access to core National Lottery systems or any of our databases, which would affect National Lottery draws or payment of prizes. In addition, no money has been deposited or withdrawn from affected player accounts.We do not hold full debit card or bank account details in National Lottery players’ online accounts and no money has been taken or deposited. However, we do believe that this attack may have resulted in some of the personal information that the affected players hold in their online account being accessed.

The advice is to change your passwords and use different passwords for different products. And if you read the Star, look at least one other news source for the full story.

Posted: 1st, December 2016 | In: Money, Reviews, Tabloids | Comment


Kids find something funny about Miss Butt in London school

We are at a loss. Cultural imperialism is rife. The Sun reports on “mum” Priscilla Terumalai, who was “hauled” into Mayville Primary School in Leytonstone, East London, to  explain why her 5-year-old daughter and her classmates had been giggling at their teacher: Miss Butt. For some reason, the figurative blighters found the name funny.

Indeed, dear reader, this is grim news. Miss Bottom, Miss Gluteus Maximus or Miss Arse would all be more suited to triggering laughter at a traditional British school. Miss Butt is so Americanised. It can’t be long before the kids are finding Miss Booty-Call hilarious.

Anyhow, Priscilla says the school is unhappy that Miss Butt was the butt of the kids’ laughter and may now move her children Annalise and Destiny to… Yes, Destiny.

Stop that! Stop that laughing. Stop it now!

PS: the local newspaper began its report: “A MOTHER says she feels ‘intimidated’ by a school after a teacher became the butt of her daughter’s humour.”

Free speech. No butts.

Posted: 1st, December 2016 | In: Reviews, Strange But True, Tabloids | Comment


I’m A Celebrity: Ola Jordan in tabloid sex toy pregnancy shocker

The Daily Star has news on Ola Jordan, the former Strictly Come Dancing hoofer now being portrayed as a sex goddess, as her her contract with high-street seller of martial aides. On its front page the Star tells readers “randy dance babe” Ola “leapt straight into bed” with her husband “minutes” after getting voted off I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here.

 

 I'm a celebrity ola-jordan-sex

 

Like most of you, we thought pot-eviction the celeb were duty bound to chat with Ant and Dec. Maybe it was foursome? As we wonder what foe son just off camera, over pages 4 and 5 we see Ola and hear her reveals all about the sex – “He did get a kiss and a cuddle.”

But that’s not all. The Star has how it”exclusively revealed that Ola was set to become a mum after her jungle stint and last night the star confirmed the news.”

Wow! She went into the jungle knowing she was pregnant? Er, no. Says Ola: “Yes I would like to be a mum one day.” Best give those “sex toys” a rest, love. They don’t come pre-loaded.

 

ola-jordan-sex-aides I'm a celebrity

 

 

Posted: 30th, November 2016 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment


No, the football sex abuse scandal is not bigger than Hillsborough

IT’S “FOOTBALL’s BIGGEST EVER CRISIS,” says the Daily Mirror as it continues to lead with the sex abuse story. Is it? Is it bigger than the Hillsborough disaster that saw 96 people lose their lives and be branded criminals by the State’s lying police force? Barry Bennell, the awful man at the epicentre of the story, is a convicted paedophile. He’s now been charged with eight sexual assaults involving a boy under 14 dating between 1981 and 1985.

 

football-abuse-barry-bennell

 

Bennell has been living as a free man in Milton Keynes. Is that justice? Eric Bristow thought it not. He said he’d have smashed the “poof” Bennell’s face in, as “real men” should. The men who did not confront their abuser are “wimps”. For expressing his crass opinion on twitter, Bristow has been sacked as a pundit on Sky Sports and paraded throughout the media as a pariah, an enemy of any right-minded human being.

You could compare Bristow to Eamonn Holmes, the Sky News presenter who earlier this year said an attack by West Ham fans on the Manchester United team bus was like Hillsborough.  “Now this is going back to the 70s and to the 80s to everything you were seeing that was bad about Hillsborough for instance,” opined Holmes on the TV. Unlike Bristow, he wasn’t shunned, and sacked.

Does the media operate a hierarchy of outrage, with being ‘unlawfully killed’ and branded a killer – and do consider 10-year-old Jon-Paul Gilhooley, the youngest to die in the horror (the coroner ordered a sample of his blood to be checked for signs of alcohol), Phillip Hammond (14), Victoria Jane Hicks (15), Peter Andrew Harrison (15), Lee Nicol (14), Philip John Steele (15) and Kevin Tyrrell (15) – lower in the table than child abuse, the horror that can be a useful way to showcase your own sound morals?

Holmes apologised and kept his job. Bristow deleted his tweets, apologised and lost his.

 

 hillsborough the sun the truth

Hillsborough-daily-star

 

When 96 people died at the football in 1989, the media blamed the victims, the State stomped on their relatives and presented all football fans as suspects. It took an arduous 26 year fight for the Hillsborough campaigners to be told the blameless dead had been unlawfully killed.

The story of sexual abuse in football is grim. Child sex abuse is an evil. But to say it is a worse football scandal than the horrors of Hillsborough is a cop out. Bennell is alive. Bennell’s victims are speaking out and being heard. They could have spoken out earlier. They might be heard in court yet. Bennell appears to have attempted suicide. He’s thought to be in the Lister Hospital, Stevenage.

The story of sex abuse in football has faces to attack, blame and shun.

The victims of Hillsborough could not speak. The coppers who lied to make killers of the victims all escaped court. They still await justice. Maybe the bereaved and abused should do as Bristow advises, take the law into their own hands and crack skulls. But that’s not easy when the weight of the State is against you. Where do you begin?

 

Posted: 30th, November 2016 | In: Key Posts, Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Manchester United balls: Why everything’s ‘wrong’ at Old Trafford (it’s not Mourinho)

“What wrong at Old Trafford,” asks the Sun’s Neil Curtis? Nothing. Manchester United are in great shape. This we know because on 6th September 2016 Neil Curtis told us about the “RED-OLUTION” at Old Trafford. “Jose Mourinho has turned Manchester United around to become the force of old in just three months,” said Curtis. Mourinho has “lifted the clouds” at United. “Mourinho is trusting the players abilities, letting them breathe.”

 

the sun mourinho jose Manchester United Neil Curtis

 

Today Curtis tells us that Manchester United have had their “worst start to a season in 27 years”. Why? Well, it’s not because Jose Mourinho is failing. It’s about him “unpicking Louis Van Gaal’s philosophy”. That would be Van Gaal who unpicked David Moyes’ philosophy. (You can read more about Jose’s philosophy here.)

Curtis adds that United have “NO TOP-CLASS STRIKER”. Really. Because Curtis wrote:

In his £250m splurge, LVG made two that excited but could not get the best out of either in Angel Di Maria and Memphis Depay. Mourinho has made four and so far Zlatan Ibrahimovic, Paul Pogba and Eric Bailly have been immediate hits.

And:

Zlatan Ibrahimovic has got his Manchester United career off to a blistering start

Another reasons: “NEW SIGNINGS STRUGGLING.” So much for Mourinho’s “immediate hits”.

And finally, lest you think Curtis will blame Mourinho, he asks himself: “Have they got the right manager?” “In my opinion,” says Curtis, “most definitely they have.”

Next question is one of ours: Would Manchester United fans prefer to have signed Jurgen Klopp or Pep Guardiola instead of the chippy Mourinho?

Over in the Mail, you can read: “Inside the troubled World of Mourinho – An obsessive man at odds with himself and his players.” So much for the RED-VOLUTION.

 

Posted: 29th, November 2016 | In: Back pages, manchester united, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Arsenal balls: Hector Bellerin’s Christmas comes early and ‘superb’ Carl Jenkinson is dropped permanently

When Gabriel came on for Arsenal as replacement for the injured Mathieu Debuchy in yesterday’s Premier League match against Bournemouth, Arsene Wenger was not surprised. “When I picked the squad I imagined that something could happen to Debuchy,” said the Arsenal manager.

Gabriel, the pacy Brazilian with the look of a 1950s mobster, was not all that convincing in the role. Should Arsenal fans be panicked? The Evening Standard says they should be, noting that “a fit Carl Jenkinson” was “left entirely out of the squad after two disappointing displays against Manchester United and Paris St Germain”.

He was dropped. Not rested?

At the United match, Carl Jenkinson made his first Premier League start for Arsenal in over two years. The Standard said “there’ll be a few more ahead of him with Hector Bellerin sidelined for around a month.” (Bellerin was injured on November 6).

So how did Jenkinson play against United? Well, the Standard told us: “Jenkinson defends superbly.”

The Mirror scored Jenkinson as Arsenal’s joint best defender in the 1-1 draw at Old Trafford: “Jenkinson – 7. Solid defensively, didn’t get much chance to go forward but passed a big test.”

How did Jenkinson do against PSG? The Standard’s live blog told us:

Jenkinson gets in a crossing position… and blazes his effort over the bar. It is greeted with major moans from the Emirates faithful but what more are you expecting from a reserve right back just back from a serious injury?

The Mirror told its readers: “Jenkinson 7 – Worked hard, got forward and played his heart out. Very committed.”

The Express had a score: “Worked hard and got forward well – 7

So back to the Standard, then, which ignores its own reports to say that Jenkinson has no future at the Gunners. James Benge writes:

Having dispensed with Jenkinson for Sunday’s game Wenger now has no choice but to persevere with the 24-year-old for at least the next fortnight, with Bellerin potentially sidelined until Christmas.

From being “superb” and worth a 7 out of 10 – and this a from player returning from a lengthy injury (“What more can you expect?”) – Jenkinson is now not even an option.

Oh, and is Bellerin out until Christmas? It’s unlikely. Because four days ago the Sun reported: “HEC OF A BOOST Arsenal injury news: Hector Bellerin hands Gunners boss Arsene Wenger a boost as he is set to return to training next week.”

Look out for more utter balls in newspapers’ football reporting every day.

 

Posted: 28th, November 2016 | In: Arsenal, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Top politicians cleared of sex abuse but showbiz and sport is full of paedos

Are you confused by all the story of paedophiles in every walk of life? Hopefully by around 2099, the Government’s nationwide trawl of historic sex crimes will be completed. Of course, by then most famous faces will be long dead. The sane move is to forcibly freeze anyone of note and then when they get accused of an awful crime defrost them over burning torches and then beat them with sticks. Sure their brains might be mush but don’t let Lord Janner’s story put you off.

So weird has the story gotten that the Mail is not alone in realising that the story of the systematic sexual abuse of minors has taken on a life of its own.

On the front we get to know that former prime minister and Tory MP Ted Heath (dead) was not a nonce.

 

daily mail ted heath

 

But on the back we get to know that football and all other sports are riddled with paedos – maybe.

 

sport daily mail sex crimes

 

Look down not up, says the class-conscious peado hunter.

As Andy Dawson puts it: “Showbiz, sport, this stuff is/was rife. BUT NOT IN TOP-LEVEL POLITICS, OKAY?”

Posted: 27th, November 2016 | In: Back pages, Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Punters suspicious of Daily Star fixed Lotto story

Is the Lotto fixed? We never thought it was. But the Star leads with news of a “new ‘FIX’ FURY”. The BBC has called time on the live Lotto draw broadcast on BBC1. From January, the falling balls will appear on the Beeb’s steaming iPlayer and not on TV channels. This has left “punters fuming” says the Star.

 

lotto-daily-star

 

On Page 9, we read that Lottery “bosses are facing new fix claims”. The thinking is that if the draw is not live on the telly, gamblers will “have to log on to the BBC iPlayer to watch the draw – meaning many are unlikely to see the balls coming out of the machine”. The many are “elderly people unable to use the internet”.  The Star says the draw will be live on Facebook, but because that is on the elderly-proof Internet, it’s useless, too.

A “regular player” tells the paper: “Far fewer people will see the live draw, and they’ll be suspicious of the numbers as a result.”

What the Star doesn’t tell you is what the Radio Times does tell you – “the winning numbers will be announced after news bulletins at intervals during the week.”

The Star also forgets to tell readers that its owned by Richard Desmond – the Press baron who also owns the Health Lottery, a rival to the Lotto.

Posted: 25th, November 2016 | In: Reviews, Tabloids | Comment


The Arsenal star and Little Mix singer’s secret dates at The Emirates

The Sun has news that Perrie Edwards, a singer with X-Factor products Little Mix, has been on “dates” with Arsenal footballer Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain. Apparently, she watched Arsenal play Spurs from Alex’s “personal box at the Emirates’ Stadium”. Perrie sat in the wingback seats at the Emirates library after browsing the club shop.

We then learn that Perrie is “keen to keep the relationship quiet”.  An unnamed source hammers this point hime by opining in the national tabloid: “They don’t follow each other on social media as they know a connection might give the game away.”

Better to sit in the player’s own box amid 60,000 other souls at a televised football match to keep it on the hush-hush.

PS: This is how the Sun followed up its scoop:

 

Oxlade-Chamberlain Perrie Edwards

 

Rose Hill writes:

LITTLE Mix’s Perrie Edwards showed that she was fully over her ex Luke Pasqualino – by wearing her new man’s team colours as she hit the stage in Italy.

Here’s the replica Arsenal strip Perrie wore:

Oxlade-Chamberlain Perrie Edwards

 

Arsenal play in red and white. Edwards is wearing red and black.

Such are the facts.

Posted: 25th, November 2016 | In: Arsenal, Celebrities, Sports, Tabloids | Comment


Barry Bennell: Manchester City implicated and Jimmy Savile exhumed in football’s peado scandal

The peado-hunt has reached football. Following the grim news that young players were molested by coaches, the Mail leads its sports coverage with a story that Manchester City are in a “sex abuse probe”. Is the entire club is in some way linked to paedophilia? Surely not. It makes you hanker for those wholesome days of randy footballers, glamour models, spit roasts at the Grosvenor hotel and super-injunctions. Seedy stuff it was was, but always between consenting adults.

The Mail’s story is overblown. City are looking at the club’s links with convicted paedophile Barry Bennell, who “coached junior teams connected to City”. The club is doing the sensible thing and looking into if Bennell ever represented City. We don’t know if he did, let alone if he abused any youngsters on City’s books.

The Mail seems to be linking a Premier League club with a lower-league scandal – Bennell was employed by Crewe Alexandra.

Over in the Mirror, which has twice this week led with the story on its front page, page 9 features a remarkable headline: “Rooney tells footy sex victims: Don’t suffer in silence.” That’s Manchester United and England’s Wayne Rooney. He wants anyone who has suffered to contact the new NSPCC hotline. ‘NSPCC chief Peter Wanless hoped Rooney would “give courage to those who may be afraid of coming forward’,” says the paper. How? Rooney was not molested. How does Rooney’s endorsement help middle-aged men confront their past? It all carries a faint whiff of PR, a chance for leading figures to be on the side of the right against a wrong anyone sane should know is criminal and revolting. Creating a sense of moral purpose from the pursuit of child-abusers is crass. But that’s how the peado-panic has been manifest for years. Child abuse stopped being about the victims and listening to someone regardless of age and social rank with respect when they make an allegation and into the nation’s defining characteristic.

 

Barry Bennell

 

And so the Sun. Over two page it invites readers to work out an answer to the headline poser: “Is beast Bennell the Jimmy Savile of football world?” The helpful bit about getting to any answer is that Bennell is alive and we know where he is: (Milton Keynes, says the Mirror; he’s in “hiding”, says the Sun). That makes him only half like Savile, who is decomposing, having died a blameless national treasure. The unhelpful bit is that the Sun’s story contains not a single fact linking Bennell to Savile. Other than in the headline, the Sun’s story on a convicted paedophile contains only one mention of the gibbering Yorkshire DJ – “the scandal now described as “potentially worse than Savile“.’

It’s lamentable that something as abhorrent as child abuse should be sensationalised. When being against child abuse is your media’s campaign, the bar has been set lower than Savile’s upturned toes.

Posted: 25th, November 2016 | In: Key Posts, Manchester City, Reviews, Sports, Tabloids | Comments (2)


Dr Morton’s rings The Donald Trump Death Cult

More on the Donald Trump Death Cult – an occasional look at media chatter on Trump’s demise. The Star being news that the US President-elect will “DIE ON THE JOB”. Jeff Farrell hears that that Trump is at “Significant risk” of dying – “if the workload as the next US president does not give him a heart attack, his missus could”.

This news comes from two medics.

dr-morton-donald trump-death

 

First up is Dr Karen Morton, billed as a “cardiologist”. There is no word that she’s ever met Trump let alone treated him. But Dr Karen has seen enough to tells us that Melania Trump will “make certain demands as a young woman in her prime”. Lest you think Dr Karen is a ghoul, she adds, “Let’s hope he doesn’t die on the job.”

The second expert is Dr Patrick Heck. He’s quoted as having told a medial conference: “He [Trump] is surely at a significant risk of a heart attack”.

Over the Express, Dr Karen is no longer a cardiologist, but “Gynaecologist Dr Karen Morton, of Dr Mortons”.

Dr Morton’s is a private medial service. We were quoted a fee of £10 per minute to speak to a doctor, after registering. An email consultation will set us back £25. The receptionist told us that, to the best of her knowledge, Dr Morton has not treated Donald Trump, father to a young child who will be surely delighted to know that such fine minds are discussing his dad’s death in the media.

It’s all done in the best possible taste, of course.

 

Posted: 24th, November 2016 | In: Politicians, Reviews, Tabloids | Comment