Posts Tagged ‘america’
American life: the most popular pastime when your old is being alone
According to Dan Kopf’s study ‘Who Americans spend their time with‘, the sixth most popular pastime for Americans is being alone. Of course, being alone might be enforced, something formed by circumstance rather than choice. But, then, so is spending time with your family and co-workers:
Spotter: Quartz
Posted: 26th, June 2017 | In: Strange But True | Comment
Male Heart Patient, 60, Sues Hosptial For Sexual Assault By 33-Year-old Female Nurse
TO Chicago, where 33-year-old registered nurse Rachel Shaper has been sacked for allegedly assailing 60-year-old patient John Cantone with “initiated unsolicited sexual relations, including intercourse”.
Shaper was sacked for “crossing professional boundaries with a patient.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Samuel L Jackson Takes Down Host While We Get All The Non-Whites Confused
“I BELIEVE that tape is going to have a life of it’s own”
And so spake KTLA reporter, Sam Rubin, after dropping a bollock so large in his new job, that everyone’s toes curled so hard, that the entire universe now has clubbed feet.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 11th, February 2014 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)
The Radically Invasive Projectile (RIP): The Last Round You’ll Ever Need
CUE the husky voice. Cue the thumping backtrack. Cue the man in combat fatigues shooting at melons. This is an advert for the Radically Invasive Projectile – The Last Round You’ll Ever Need. It is the RIP Cartridge.
The RIP bullet is not only handy pun that gives death’s tribute a twist or gut-mangling gorn, but it is “effective against”:
PLYWOOD
AUTOGLASS
Freeze muvverfukkers
SHEETROCK
CINDERBLOCK
SHEETMETAL
And…
MULTIPLE DENIM LAYERS
They never stood a chance
Comes with free thesaurus:
Posted: 29th, January 2014 | In: The Consumer | Comments (3)
The Night That Changed America: A Grammy Salute To The Beatles May Well Be The Worst Karaoke Gig Ever
AMERICA’S fondness for The Beatles is unwavering and borderline bizarre. Of course, The Beatles are brilliant and hugely significant, but it isn’t like The States have a plethora of heroes to celebrate that belong to their shores.
Either way, they’ll be celebrating The Fabs again with a show called The Night That Changed America: A Grammy Salute To The Beatles, which will be recorded at the Los Angeles Convention Centre on January 27.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 6th, January 2014 | In: Celebrities, Music | Comment
Oh No! Major Character From Family Guy Gets Killed Off!
SPOILERS. Sorry, the first word of this article was so blunt, but there’s people out there who are so feeble, so jumpy, so gawpingly pathetic that they need to be told about the contents of an internet article, or indeed, absolutely everyone’s social media feeds, in case someone spoils a TV show or film for them.
Some people rant about spoilers for films that are decades old. You’ve have your chance buddy. Shit, or get off the pot.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 25th, November 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment
Dayna Morales: Waitress Denied Tip For Being Gay – Internet Goes Crazy And Lovely
UPDATE: A husband and wife tell NBC 4 New York they did leave a tip. They say they have a credit card statement as proof. The tip was a generous $18. The wife says: “We’ve never not left a tip when someone gave good service, and we would never leave a note like that.”
Morales adds: “I don’t know, all I know is what I’ve been saying.”
Morales had recently announced that people were sending her tips from all over the world, and was donating some of the money to the Wounded Warrior Project. “I just felt like people have a right to know that — it’s fine if people want to donate to her or to the Wounded Warriors, but they’re doing it under a false pretense,” the wife said.
…..
This is the original story:
WE all know that idiots get weird around gay people. Presumably their brains get tied in knots because they constantly and vividly imagine all that sex they do. They get a clear image in their minds about glistening gay naked bodies all writhing around. That’s because, absolutely 100% across the board, bigots are all a bit pervy.
And so to a waitress in New Jersey who had her £10 tip withheld and was left a crappy note by a bigoted customer, allegedly. She says she was denied her tip because she is a gay woman. She told the internet and now, she’s been inundated with more than £1,000 in donations from around the world.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 15th, November 2013 | In: Money, Reviews, Strange But True, The Consumer | Comments (2)
Unleashing Police Gunmen On Students: America’s Hot New Educational Fad
IF you missed last week’s “mad gunman terrorizes American schoolchildren” news story, this time out of North Carolina, don’t feel bad; these days they’re common enough that it’s not reasonable to expect any one person can keep up with them all.
Still, last week’s story was notable for two reasons: One, nobody actually got shot; and two, the gunman was on the school’s payroll. Seriously: Administrators at Eastern Wayne Middle School later sent parents a letter explaining that they sent a masked gunman to various sixth-grade classrooms as an “enrichment lesson on exhibiting good citizenship and observing your surroundings.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 21st, October 2013 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comments (6)
Iowa Debates Issuing Guns To The Blind
“IT seems a little strange, but the way the law reads we can’t deny them (a permit) just based on that one thing,” says Sgt. Jana Abens, a spokeswoman for the Polk County Sheriff’s Department, Iowa, referring to blind person’s right to own and carry a gun. “In the past year, Polk County has issued permits to at least three people who were legally blind, or were unable to read the application form due to visual impairment.”
Delaware County Sheriff John LeClere adds:
“I’m not an expert in vision. At what point do vision problems have a detrimental effect to fire a firearm? If you see nothing but a blurry mass in front of you, then I would say you probably shouldn’t be shooting something.”
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 16th, October 2013 | In: Reviews, Strange But True | Comment
Watch a weatherman eat cat vomit, live on air
AN American news report took a turn for the worse when a weatherman ate cat puke live on air. Weatherman Scot Haney made viewers recoil in horror when he ignored the five-second rule after noticing something on the floor which he fancied eating.
He thought they were grape nuts.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 14th, October 2013 | In: Strange But True, TV & Radio | Comment
United States fakes the return of its Vietnem War dead in ceremonies
THE US military has been faking repatriation ceremonies for dead American servicemen killed in Vietnam or the Second World War. The coffins paraded before the Press and the respectful veterans and weeping relatives contain soldiers’ remains that arrived weeks earlier to be processed in forensic labs and identified.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 11th, October 2013 | In: Reviews | Comments (2)
Shutdown US Government deems parks and underfed babies less essential than the Congress heated pool and arresting poor blacks with drugs
WHO the hell decides what is and is not “essential”? That’s not a philosophical question about life, the universe and everything; I’m asking specifically about the idiotic “let’s play chicken with the whole country” federal-government-shutdown thing playing out here in America.
The way it works is, “essential” employees of the federal government still go to work and get paid, while everybody else stays home (and will likely get paid anyway, though not until after the shutdown ends). Check out who’s working and who’s not and it soon becomes obvious that, even by the standards of a creepy police surveillance state, the US government has seriously warped priorities.
Essential: the Drug Enforcement Administration, responsible for arresting and imprisoning anybody who uses intoxicants other than alcohol and prescribed pharmaceuticals, is open.
Not essential: the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, responsible for monitoring and tracking contagious illness, switched to shutdown mode.
So if one of those deadly science-fiction-movie-type pandemic viruses breaks out during the shutdown, the government can’t track the spread of the contagion but will still arrest anyone trying unapproved forms of medical treatment.
Essential: the private gym and heated swimming pool where members of Congress can work out at taxpayer expense.
Not essential: the WIC (Women, Infants and Children) program providing food assistance to extremely poor moms with extremely young kids.
Because where “essential use of taxpayer dollars” is concerned, helping a Congressman burn extra calories off his corrupt and flabby ass takes precedence over getting extra calories to hungry babies who aren’t getting enough. (Though perhaps that’s not a fair criticism to make. Cory Doctorow speculated the real reason the gym’s staying open is because so many Congressmen live in their congressional office suites and use the gym’s shower facilities to bathe. Can we really criticize them for that? Trying to cleanse Congressmen of their own foul stench isn’t “non-essential” so much as “a lost cause.”)
Not essential: America’s national parks and all the park rangers who staff them; hence, all the national parks are closed.
Essential: The National Park Service also “closed” the World War Two and Vietnam War memorials on the National Mall in Washington, DC, which are actually open-air monuments in the middle of a large, unenclosed public area. So the only way to “close” these monuments is to have staff set up temporary barricades blocking area usually open to everybody, requiring far more manpower than simply leaving them open ever would.
Also deemed essential were the Yellowstone park rangers who allegedly locked tourists in their hotel, and even prevented them from taking pictures of animals. Can’t let people have fun in national parks, but must scare the hell out of those who try. It’s all about priorities.
Posted: 11th, October 2013 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment
Teacher sacked for saving all the children’s lives
A DAYCARE teacher has been sacked from her job after putting out a fire, potentially saving everyone’s lives. That’s lousy isn’t it?
Michelle Hammack smelled smoke coming from the kitchen of Little Temples Childcare in Jacksonville, when she left her classroom of sleeping children to find out what was going on.
Read the rest of this entry »
31 photos of America in colour from 1939-1943
THESE photographs give us an idea what America looked like from 1939 to 1943. Taken by the Farm Security Administration/Office of War Information, the pictures record life living in depressed rural America. Life looked tough. The faces of the people captured have a hard edge.
Read the rest of this entry »
Car hit by flying toilet
DRIVERS will testify that driving itself, is pretty cool. The freedom of the open road, listening to tunes in your car and being free to go anywhere is one of life’s best pleasures. However, it is constantly spoiled by everything else.
You have to feel for the poor sod who was driving around, only to find that their wheels were hit by a flying toilet.
The driver was on her way to school in Thorndike, Maine, when out of nowhere, he motor was thronked by a portable toilet that didn’t have any business travelling through the sky.
Local chief deputy Jeff Trafton said she tried to swerve away from the large object, which flew out of a delivery truck. Ronnie Furrow may have a brilliant name, but he’s also responsible for the flying latrine, and has been issued a summon for not properly securing his load.
Mercifully, the toilet in question was confirmed as being clean, reports BDN Maine.
Imagine if it wasn’t. The teenagers turning up at school looking like a silage equivalent of Carrie would’ve ensured a bullying that would’ve lasted the rest of her waking days.
Posted: 9th, May 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment
Massive wuss of a policeman has a massive cry thanks to marijuana cake
THUNDERING wimp, Mike Berkemeier, a policeman from Ohio, has been chilled to his core after he accidentally ate a cake filled with marijuana which belonged to his daughter.
The additional ingredient of cannabis left him feeling disorientated and confused. Then a bit horny. Then hungry. Then amused. Then sleepy. Possibly.
Read the rest of this entry »
Church refuses straight weddings until gay marriage is recognised
RECENTLY in Britain, ‘gay marriage’ became plain old ‘marriage’, but over in America, things aren’t quite as rosy. American’s still love being told what to do by a man from the middle east, it seems. However, one of Jesus’ flock has decided to make a stand by saying that they’ll be stopping straight people from tying the knot until gay marriage gets the green light by the state of North Carolina.
The Green Street United Methodist Church in Winston-Salem has publicly slated North Carolina’s position to prohibit same-sex marriage and “all the rights and privileges marriage brings”.
Read the rest of this entry »
Man swallowed whole by dreadful sinkhole
NATURE has a way of showing mankind just who is boss. Throw all the detritus in the sea and it’ll slap you with a flood. Christ knows what must of happened to result in the poor sod who went missing this week after a large sinkhole opened under the bedroom in Tampa… and he hasn’t been seen since.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 1st, March 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment
Ghost steals woman’s CV and clothes
LIFE is hard enough just dealing with humans, their offspring and their pets. Imagine then, if things from other realms started mucking about with us!
That’s what one lady has told Georgia’s police force after her CV and some clothes got stolen by a ghost. No, you are most certainly not going mental. A woman called Debbie Michelle Zamacona, has told police that her CV, criminal history and a black and blue blouse all went missing, thanks to a creepy spectre.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 27th, February 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment
Cheap pizza in America if you order it with a gun
IF you want cheap products, order them with a massive gun in your hand. Now, most of you will be thinking ‘that’s just robbery, rather than completing a fair transaction!’, but you’ve clearly not heard about the pizza parlour in Virginia which is offering discount to customers if they are carrying a firearm.
No, seriously.
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 21st, February 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment
Theme park to be built on Bin Laden’s corpse
WHEN Osama Bin Laden died, the whole of America cheered! The bogeyman had been captured, adding a head for the poles that contained Gadaffi and Saddam! Oh, how America love to hunt people in the Middle East down! And so, ill-feeling in the Middle East grows toward America.
What. A. Surprise.
Read the rest of this entry »
Buckethead Man robs a shop
BREAKING and entering shops, so you can steal things, is hardly the most noble of pursuits, but god bless criminals who do things the old-fashioned way by donning a disguise.
Just like the man who donned a bucket on his head while going on the rob in Louisiana!
Read the rest of this entry »
Teacher who is afraid of children, to sue
CHILDREN are terrifying things, with their snotty little faces, gurgling traps and little accusatory fists. It is little wonder we treat them with such contempt.
One person who is really frightened of children is an ex-teacher who is suing her former school district, saying that was discriminated against for her fear of children. You heard.
Read the rest of this entry »
Is it a bird? Is it a plane? What? It really is a flying Superman?!
IMAGINE for a moment, that you’re riding around with a friend in SoCal, and suddenly, one of you notices that Superman is flying over your head.
You’d either die from happiness or start leaping around, crazed and unable to process the information and ending up throwing up all over yourself, before hurtling yourself into the sea.
Read the rest of this entry »
Killer gets a fate worse than prison – CHURCH!
AMERICA is a dangerous place filled with guns and cholesterol, but this time, they’ve gone too far. A seventeen year old kid has been found guilty of manslaughter, which isn’t unusual. So is he getting sent to prison? NO! Far, far worse than that!
HE IS BEING SENT TO CHURCH!
Read the rest of this entry »
Posted: 20th, November 2012 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)
