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I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here. | Anorak

Posts Tagged ‘I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here.’

I’m A Celebrity: Ola Jordan in tabloid sex toy pregnancy shocker

The Daily Star has news on Ola Jordan, the former Strictly Come Dancing hoofer now being portrayed as a sex goddess, as her her contract with high-street seller of martial aides. On its front page the Star tells readers “randy dance babe” Ola “leapt straight into bed” with her husband “minutes” after getting voted off I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here.

 

 I'm a celebrity ola-jordan-sex

 

Like most of you, we thought pot-eviction the celeb were duty bound to chat with Ant and Dec. Maybe it was foursome? As we wonder what foe son just off camera, over pages 4 and 5 we see Ola and hear her reveals all about the sex – “He did get a kiss and a cuddle.”

But that’s not all. The Star has how it”exclusively revealed that Ola was set to become a mum after her jungle stint and last night the star confirmed the news.”

Wow! She went into the jungle knowing she was pregnant? Er, no. Says Ola: “Yes I would like to be a mum one day.” Best give those “sex toys” a rest, love. They don’t come pre-loaded.

 

ola-jordan-sex-aides I'm a celebrity

 

 

Posted: 30th, November 2016 | In: Celebrities, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment


The Sun Says: Sick Footballers Bully Gemma Collins By Comparing Her To Wayne Rooney And Shrek

GEMMA Collins is out the I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! jungle and the Sun says she’s been bullied. No, not by a TV producer encouraging her to eat a kangaroo’s anus. Gemma’s been bullied by footballers on Twitter!

QUEENS Park Rangers ace Charlie Austin, 25, branded Gemma “the female Shrek” in a string of abusive posts on Twitter. His ex-Burnley team-mates Kieran Trippier, George Porter and Kevin Long also joined in.

Calling Gemma Collins Shrek is appalling. Hats off to the Sun for highlighting this shocking abuse:

 

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Calling another human being Shrek is a shocking low, says the Sun:

 

 

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The Sun ends with:

Their taunts came as the FA rolled out a week-long anti-bullying campaign.

Footballers are such bullies – even the ones who look like Shrek…

Posted: 20th, November 2014 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, Sports | Comment


Gemma Collins Gets £40,000 For Teaching Us How To Kill A TV Celebrity

gemma collins

 

WHY did weeping Gemma Collins quit the I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here! jungle? The Sun knows:

DEVASTATED Gemma Collins last night revealed her four days in the jungle had been haunted by the memory of her bitter break-up with her boyfriend. The Towie star — who dramatically quit I’m A Celebrity yesterday — admitted she was struggling to cope after the bust-up with Alex Moss hours before flying to Australia.

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Posted: 20th, November 2014 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment


I’m A Celebrity: Michael Buerk Changes His Name To ‘Feed The Playboy Bunny’

buerke i'm a celebrity

Feed Me!

 

THIRTY years ago, Michael Buerk brought the pain of millions of starving Ethiopians to British screens. His BBC report in 1984 sparked Bob Geldof to create Live Aid.

Buerk said the broadcast was one of “the most influential pieces of television ever broadcast [prompting] a surge of generosity across the world for Ethiopia[that raised] more than $130 million”.

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Posted: 12th, November 2014 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment


I’m A Celebrity: Charlie Brooks votes UKIP and enjoys more child-free days

ON a game called Door To Door,  I’m a Celebrity foddeUKIPr Charlie Brooks was invited to open a door. Pick the right door from five and she’d get a prize. The prize was a child called Kiki. Jimmy Savile had not fixed it for Kiki to meet Charlie. Kiki is Charlie’s daughter. She’s seven.

Charlie picked the door marked UKIP Rotherham and instead of a child got herpes or congenital warts. She said it was “heartbreaking” not see her kid. She said it was a “kick in the guts“. She then went and sat on a log in a TV studio in the Australian rainforest and bemoned her luck.

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Posted: 29th, November 2012 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment


Nadine Dorries, wave goodbye to your career!

POLITICIANS, as we all know, as thundering bozos. They don’t know their arses from their elbows and they prove it time and time again by their wilfully idiotic actions. And Nadine Dorries, a particularly loathsome oaf, has proved how dim MPs are once again, by agreeing to go on I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here!

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Posted: 6th, November 2012 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)


Mark Wright Of The Jungle: TOWIE Man Explains Why He’s In Australia

MEAT-faced TOWIE star Mark Wright, star of the abortion ‘n’ tell, delivers his thoughts on going into the I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here jungle:

“It has been a very emotional year. I have played out my life and relationships on TV. I need a complete break. This is a great way to do it…”

What better way, indeed…

Posted: 10th, November 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Lembit Opik And Nelson Mandela: The Long Walk To I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here

LEMBIT Opik will not be the Lib Dems’ candidate for the post of London Mayoral at the next election. He lost to former I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here agonist Brian Paddick. Opik, a former MP and former would-be Mr Cheeky girl, reportedly reacted to his blow by telling one and all:

“I think like every great politician you have to have some wilderness years. Nelson Mandela had them.”

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Posted: 8th, September 2011 | In: Politicians | Comment


I’m A Celebrity: Katie Price Vows Her Kids Will Die If She Eats Another Gonad

katie-price-quitsI’M A Celebrity: How the old dead tree press responded to the news that Katie Price has quit the jungle:

The Sun (front page): “Jordan: no more trials”

Not a shabby effort at prediction. But, in reality, this is just a quote from Katie on last night’s show.

Says Katie Price:

I swore on my kids’ lives I’m not doing any more. I am not doing any more. I am not doing any more. I have said to them I am not doing it.”

Why not swear on her own life? Why brings the kids into it? Their lives are tied to their mum’s bug eating? If she eat more bugs – they die! This is terible. Although, it is good telly…

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Posted: 23rd, November 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment


I’m A Celebrity: Katie Price’s ‘Only Interview’ Causes ‘Mayhem’

katie-price-swampI’M A Celebrity In OK: In this weeks’ OK! magazine Katie Price delivers her “only interview” (today), Samantha Fox calls Jordan a “freak” and Kerry Katona says she’ll see Katie in the jungle.

It’s the I’m A Celebrity jungle special in this week’s OK! magazine as the organ trails the show that has, er, already started.

To make this one fly, and the £2,.60 cover price worth it, OK! needs a scoop. Can it find one?

“With a face full of Botox, a mouth like a Kalashnikov, a head packed with explosive secrets, celebrity tornado Katie Price is sure to cause total mayhem as she rips through the I’m a Celebrity… jungle camp.”

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Posted: 18th, November 2009 | In: Key Posts, OK! | Comment


I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here Is Benidorm In The Jungle, in Pictures

I’M A Celebrity comment do the day comes from Anorak reader Malcolm Henry:

They have transported the cast of Benidorm wholesale into the Jungle. . .

The proof:

Colin & Justin - I'm A Celebrity

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Colin & Justin - I'm A Celebrity


Posted: 16th, November 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (2)


I’m A Celebrity Kangaroos Get Fruit Flavoured Condoms

condomsSO tasty are Condomi’s fruit-flavored condoms – “taste like real fruit” – that your significant other will sink their teeth into your penis in the manner of Katie Price eating a kangaroo’s member on I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here.

Either that or the reassuringly snug Condomi will peel your member like Abu Hamza tugging at an under-ripe satsuma.

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Posted: 16th, November 2009 | In: Money | Comments (2)


Katie Price And Sex Talk Peter Andre Check Into The Mayfair Hotel

jordan-peter4KATIE Price and Peter Andre: Jordan and Peter Andre spend the night together. And Pete talks of sex.

This is front-page news in the Daily Star:

“JORDAN SPENDS NIGHT WITH PETER.”

Lest you think there is no romance, the Star says it is a “hotel ‘date’”. Those inverted commas suggest that the Star is trying to have it every way, seducing readers with talk of a Katie and Peter’s coming together and then coaching the small print in quotes.

LOVE-split couple Kate Price and Peter Andre booked into the same hotel yesterday, we can reveal.

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Posted: 10th, November 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comment (1)


Sophie Anderton Charged £15k For 120 Seconds Of Sex

SOPHIE Anderton, reality TV fodder, Jeremy Kyle interviewee and, reportedly, a former coke dealer says she “sold sex for £15k an hour”.

It’s a confession that begs the question: Sex with whom?

For £15,000 an hour, Old Mr Anorak’ assures us that you can go for bulk and have sex with an entire south-east Asian island – literally – most of Basildon or the late Queen Mother.

Reading on, however, it turns out that Sophie says there was someone out there willing to stump up the £15,000 fee to have sex with her, for a whole hour.

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Posted: 26th, September 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (2)


Spencer Pratt And Heidi Back In the Jungle

spencer-prattSPENCER Pratt is the shiny-toothed, vapid, Fauntleroy-headed American celeb with the estate agent looks – the epitome of nominative determinism – who has been on the US version of I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!.

Pratt has now left. After one day. He took his other half,  Heidi Montag – yeah, Heidi, as in the auld-Nazi goat girl – with him.

This picture is of the gruesome twosome arriving back in LA.

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Posted: 3rd, June 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment


I’m A Celebrity: George Takei Makes Joe Swash An Offer

INSIGHT of the week: George Takei speaking to I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here winner Joe Swash:

And I can visit Joey next time I’m in London on business. Or Joey can stay with me next time he’s in Hollywood.”

George sets them up – you hammer them in…

See you in London, Joe…

Posted: 12th, December 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)


Nicola McLean Employs The Danielle Lloyd Defence In Trial As The New Kerry Katona

NICOLA McLean and her Jordans are out of the Celebrity jungle and winding down, literally, in an Australian hotel. Is she the new Kerry Katona?

What next for Skippy gonad nosher Nicola? Can roo gonads be frozen and placed into an Iceland pie? Would they impove the texture?

First up, Nicola has to read her “hate mail” and tell Star readers:

“Others wrote ‘cover up you slag’ and some said I was a bully.”

As is the way with any celebrity accused of bullying, the accused should explain at great length that they were bullied at school:

“I was bullied at primary school quite badly. So I would never bully anyone.”

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Posted: 5th, December 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)


Skippy Nicola McLean Knocks David Van Day Into A Cocked Hat

BLUE Peter Garden survivalist Nicola McLean is not only a massive pair of Jordans – she’s a massive pair of Jordans with a lack of self-awareness that would put Tatler’s three witches to shame.

Says Nicola in the Star, which offers her more support than a cheerleader in a Wonderbra:

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Posted: 4th, December 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Carly Zucker trapped in six-star reality hell

CARLY Zucker may have left the jungle but ‘I’m A Celeb…’ producers have reportedly ignored her tearful requests to fly home and get her hands on fiance Joe Cole’s “buff bod” (her words, not ours).

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Posted: 3rd, December 2008 | In: Sports | Comments (2)


Nicola McLean: Get ‘Em While They’re Hot

WAS Nicola McLean ever entirely in the Blue Peter Jungle?

While McLean’s head was in the right place, her chests were rumoured to be back at the hotel being pampered and prepped for interviews and fame.

Now all of McLean is in the hotel. And the Sun’s former Page 3 columnist and Daily Star mainstay tells us that she is “gagging” for sex with Peterborough United footballer Tommy Williams.

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Posted: 3rd, December 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comments (5)


A Dose Of Incest Repellent In The I’m A Celebrity Jungle

NEWS from the Blue Party jungle is that the maggots of the celebrity world are breeding.

While Armani Blow-fly tells all about her romp up Robert Kilroy-Silk’s shorts, Joe Swash says:

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Posted: 28th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities, Photojournalism | Comment


Carly Zucker’s naked bottom is more interesting than the Champions League

Last night’s Champions League action = meh.

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Posted: 27th, November 2008 | In: Sports | Comment (1)


Robert Kilroy Silk Is Out

KILROY-Silk is out of the jungle.

Is Mallett the only one laughing?

Posted: 26th, November 2008 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)


Wag The Dog: Carley Zucker Waits For Joe Cole To Stump Up

“IT’S Really, really tough being rich,” says lucky Carly Zucker, Wag to Chelsea and England footballer Joe Cole and Blue Peter garden dweller.

Well, not, that’s not what she said. What she said was:

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Posted: 26th, November 2008 | In: Celebrities | Comment


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