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Posts Tagged ‘CCTV’

CCTV Operator Convicted Of Voyeurism (Doesn’t Get Promoted)

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THIS is just great. A  CCTV operator has been convicted of voyeurism.

Ciaran McCleave, 51, of Newtownabbey, Northern Ireland, worked at Antrim Road police station. He spent 79 minutes over a 26-day period staring into the windows of a woman’s home. He spied on the woman for his own “sexual gratification”.Judge Ramsey QC said McCleave’s spying  was a “flagrant and wilful abuse of the trust placed in you by the public as a CCTV operator”.

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Posted: 29th, September 2014 | In: Reviews | Comment


Man destroys entire booze section (video)

WHEN you cock-up at work, with some sly behaviour, you can get away with murder. However, if you work in a supermarket, surrounded by CCTV, it isn’t so easy.

Especially when you’re the poor sod who destroys a whole section of lovely, lovely booze.

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Posted: 14th, October 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment


After Leveson and hacking the Sun supports Prism and the Big Brother State

big brotehr sun

WHAT did the Sun have to say about Prism, the pact between technology companies and the US and UK Governments to store data on all internet users?

“They’re not remotely interested in the millions of ordinary citizens leading law-abiding lives.”

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Posted: 18th, June 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment


Thief snatches bag before KOing himself with a window (video)

thief door glass

THIEVES aren’t funny if they’re stealing from you, but when they’re removed, bungling idiots, then we can all hoot away to our heart’s content because frankly, they deserve it.

And so, to a man in Perth who snatched someone’s handbag in a shopping centre.

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Posted: 2nd, April 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment


Indian motorcyclist women are much, much harder than you

indian scooter run over copy

PEOPLE who ride motorbikes think they’re pretty tough, waddling around in their leather romper suits and Street Hawk crash helmets, doing 23mph down the road with ‘Born To Be Wild’ playing in their heads.

The freedom of the road! The constant terror that you might fall over and scratch that lovely paintwork! Motorcycling! It is like riding a car, but colder!

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Posted: 5th, March 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)


CCTV catches naked man, locked out of room and dealing with unhelpful humans (video)

CCTV cameras have caught a toe-curlingly amusing moment when one unlucky pup found himself locked outside of him hotel room with no clothes on. That’s zero clothes. Naked as the day he was born. Not even a sock to his name.

And, worse still, this poor sod finds that he’s dealing with the most unhelpful creatures on the planet – humans.

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Posted: 27th, February 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)


CCTV footage of the Ruislip ghost!

WOOOOOO! A spooky video has emerged online of CCTV footage showing a spectre appearing at a community centre in north-west London!

The video shows a slim figure suddenly appear outside the entrance of South Ruislip Community Association and Community Centre before it chillingly walks through a metal railing before vanishing into thin air!

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Posted: 20th, February 2013 | In: Strange But True | Comment (1)


Newsreader falls into canal while texting… and it’s on video!

CCTV footage has emerged, capturing a local newsreader falling arse-over-tit into a frozen canal after being distracted by her phone.

Laura Safe (raises eyebrows at the nominative determinism) works for Capital FM Birmingham, and was sending her boyfriend a text when she failed to look up and found herself immersed in dirty, freezing water. She’s probably got polio now or something, but it is still funny.

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Posted: 25th, January 2013 | In: Reviews, TV & Radio | Comment


Wild deer runs through the streets of Chelmsford to signal end of world

BADGERS are collapsing roads, tiny horses are using public transport, cows are harder than you and catfish are killing land mammals. Slowly but surely, animals are showing humans that they’re coming for them and that mankind’s time is nearing an end.

We’ve been warning you all for ages, yet no-one is taking us at all seriously.

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Posted: 4th, January 2013 | In: Reviews | Comment


Watch, as a man wins $588m

WINNING the lottery is something most of us have idly dreamed of at some point, but imagine for a second if it actually came true AND the moment you found out was captured on film.

Most of us would run wildly around, defecating and sobbing into strangers bosoms. One man in America could barely conceal his delight in Maryland when he found out he’d scooped the $588m Powerball jackpot!

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Posted: 3rd, December 2012 | In: Money, Reviews | Comment


Dudley youth entertains on town’s CCTV

TO Dudley, West Midlands, where a local youth is showing his displeasure at being monitored on CCTV. Why do we watch everyone? For the laughs:

Posted: 29th, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


The Canary Wharf CCTV Christmas Tree

SAY Martin Belam: “Nothing says Xmas like “CCTV in operation” dangling from a tree” in London’s Canary Wharf:

Posted: 12th, November 2012 | In: The Consumer | Comment


Maryland police erect CCTV cameras to watch CTV cameras

TO Maryland, where CCTV cameras are being erected to watch CCTV cameras. CCTV camera vandals are thought to be operating in the area.

Prince George’s County Police Maj. Robert V. Liberati outlines the dream:

“It’s not worth going to jail over a $40 ticket or an arson or destruction of property charge.”

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Posted: 15th, September 2012 | In: Reviews, Technology | Comment


CCTV in schools: ‘If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear’

WHAT is the purpose of placing CCTV cameras in schools? Is it to collect data on pupils and teachers? Is it an attempt by the officials to prove how in control they are and how much they care for the student and staff body? The CCTV camera represents interaction. Don’t discuss and inspire. Just command and be omnipresent. “If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear.” So goes the mantra.

In 2008, the Examination Officers’ Association (EOA) conducted a pilot scheme that it hoped would catch out cheats. EOA chief executive Andrew Harland, said back then:

“There is a growing problem of security and we’re trying to come to terms with that. CCTV would work, both for officers and for the students, in alleviating problems of accusations and speculation. I’m not a ‘big brother’ fan, but you have increasing numbers of people who don’t know the students in the hall.”

People have always cheated. CCTV is installed because its lazy and works on the hideous premise that everyone is a prospective cheat. And that includes the teachers.

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Posted: 13th, September 2012 | In: Key Posts, Reviews | Comment (1)


Cigarette Thief Drops Loot Twice: CCTV Idiot Of The Day

TO Boynton Beach , Florida, in pursuit of the cigarette thief who forgot to steal a decent swag bag.

You are about to see CCTV footage of a man stealing a load of smokes from the  Walgreen’s store on South Federal Highway just past 3 a.m. on Monday last.

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Posted: 10th, September 2011 | In: Strange But True | Comment


Pamela Somerville, Mark Andrews And The Failure Of CCTV

SERGEANT Mark Andrews has been acquitted of assault occasioning actual bodily harm. Andrews was one star of the police video in which Pamela Somerville was dragged into a police cell. She was left unconscious and bleeding from her face, specifically a wound by an eye.

Appeal judge Mr Justice Bean said Somerville’s injuries “were probably caused by her falling to the floor after letting go of the door frame”.

The CCTV images may not tell the full story after all. But the Mail seeks to pad it out. Did you know that Ms Somerville is “a privately educated former market researcher”?

We then learn:

“Ms Somerville, who is now partially blind in her left eye and is awaiting cataract surgery.”

The story is being loaded, is it not?

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Posted: 21st, November 2010 | In: Reviews | Comment


Internet Eyes: Make Money Watching CCTV Crimes On The Web

cctv4VOYEURS, journalists, the institutionalised looking to fill the void between episodes of Jeremy Kyle can win £1,000 by joining the Citizen Crimewatchers whose job it is to monitoring CCTV security cameras over the internet.

Camera owners need you to keep a vigil on their streaming home movies. And the best bit is that these camera owners will pay you a wage to watch the footage.

Britain has 4.2 million security cameras, and only 60million people to man them. Internet Eyes will crackle into life in Stratford-upon-Avon but very soon you too will be able to register for free and watch four cameras, winning a prize for every crime spotted.

Tony Morgan, who set up the site, tells us:

“This could turn out to be the best crime prevention weapon there’s ever been. I wanted to combine the serious business of stopping crime with the incentive of winning money. There are over four million CCTV cameras and only one in a thousand is watched. This way cameras will be watched 24 hours a day.”

It’s ingenious. The Internet requires no TV licence and ITV must be kicking themselves they never thought this one up. A CCTV camera by Katie’ Price’s driveway could get its own series on ITV1, ITV2 with repeats on ITV 3 and the behind the lens technical report show on ITV4.

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Posted: 6th, October 2009 | In: Technology | Comment (1)


CCTV Stops Couple Having Sex

cctvIN Northampton, a CCTV operative is commanding a couple to stop having sex.

The couple should not stop having sex permanently – the Minister of Procreation will decide on that. No, they should stop having sex by the CCTV camera. The CCTV operatives do not like it much.

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Posted: 14th, June 2009 | In: Strange But True | Comment