TV & Radio Category

Television and radio programme reviews, trailers, highlights, twilights and cinema news. Also the neglected gems from years past.

BBC Crimewatch does mugshots with theme music

MUGSHOT of the day on the BBC’s Crimewatch:

Posted: 19th, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

BBC want you to dress as ‘paedophile’ Elvis Presley to celebrate Children in Need

THE BBC has not been hyping Children in Need as much as other years. (See Jimmy Savile.) But it’s on with the telethon. And the BBC has tips on how to make the day special. You can dress up in fancy dress. BBC tips include:

Fancy Dress

Wherever you are, it’s always fun to dress up. Whether you work at a school, supermarket or in an office, it’s easy to organise a fancy dress day! Over the years, millions of people up and down the country have dressed up in crazy outfits in aid of BBC Children in Need and in the record-breaking 2011 Appeal we all went a bit spotty!

2. …You could create a theme… go back in time to the swinging sixties or live the celeb lifestyle as a ‘Hollywood Honey’ or maybe even go to work as the King! The list is literally endless!

4. …Always get sponsored by people you trust rather than strangers.

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Posted: 16th, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

When Iggy Pop shagged a teddy on BBC children’s telly Captain Sensible laughed

WITH the BBC in the mire and floundering, time to look back at what else aside from a predatory paedophile Aunty dished up to the kidzzz in those dark, Satanic days of the 1980s.

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Posted: 13th, November 2012 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment

Who wants to see Jamie Oliver sucking a dildo?

HAVE you seen Jamie Oliver’s Fifteen Minute Meals? It’s a show so irritating that it makes you want to punch the very notion of television into next week. And Jamie, here’s an idea: 1.5 Second Meals where someone just throws a Jaffa Cake in their mouth and gets on with their lives without bogling at lettuce.

Anyway, when Jamie isn’t larging it up over some prawns on a massive wooden board, he’s pretending to be Food Bono, saving our wickle children from a fate worse than delicious hamburgers.

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Posted: 12th, November 2012 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment

1984: June O’Brien’s toaster is possessed by the Devil (and Eli Wallach)

FLASHBACK to 1984: The Today show features June O’Brine, a woman hose toaster is possessed by the Devil. Satan speaks through the toaster. And  – get this – he sounds like Eli Wallach:

Posted: 11th, November 2012 | In: Flashback, TV & Radio | Comment

Jamie Giddens is the

JAMIE Giddens is the

Since my early teens I have always been keen on weather but for the last 20 years I have done other things, until recently when I realised that my weather forecasting ambitions may possibly be acheived from my own front yard.

Posted: 10th, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Dof pricks up its ears for Wu Tang Clan

SO. Your dog loves Wu Tang Clan. Prick up your ears, Bobo:

Posted: 9th, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Phillip Schofield asks Cameron about paedophiles and PM gets confused

SOMETIMES, television is so bewildering that you can’t possibly believe that it is comprised of real human beings. Take for example, this morning, when Phillip Schofield went feral and handed our Prime Minister, David Cameron, a piece of paper with a list of Tory MPs who the presenter believes are paedophiles.

Let us look at that again. Gordon The Gopher’s best friend went online, found a load of names who have been accused of raping children, presumably with little to no actual evidence, and wrote them down on a bit of paper and handed them to the man who has an entire country to run, and expected an answer.

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Posted: 8th, November 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comments (2)

Radio Lincolnshire’s Vox Pop Of the year – with added spite

RADIO Lincolnshire’s Vox Pop of the day – with added spite. The last line is horribly good:

Posted: 5th, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Indian soap opera goes nuts on sounds and close ups

INDIAN soap opera clip of the day. Look out for these kinds of close ups and sound effects on EastEnders. I see your drum rolls and raise you face rolls:

Posted: 3rd, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Two girls one mud bath

TAKING a mud bath in Japan. We call this Two Girls One Mud Bath:

Posted: 3rd, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Captain Kirk grabs the phallic cave rock

FLASHBACK photo of the day features Star Trek’s Captain Kirk and a favoured rock:

Posted: 2nd, November 2012 | In: Flashback, TV & Radio | Comment

Is this the worst star prize in TV game show history?

BULLSEYE was a super, smashing, great show. Marvellous. I watched it keeping score of how many superlatives Jim Bowen used. One thing, however, was rubbish: the star prize:

Posted: 1st, November 2012 | In: Flashback, TV & Radio | Comment

Countdown overrun by filth and immigrants

COUNTDOWN is still on Channel 4. Today’s Countdown Conundrum is “RAMMINGIT”. The answer is slightly less filthy, more dirty and threatening, especially to Daily Express and Daily Mail readers:

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Posted: 1st, November 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Revealed: 10 reasons why the BBC sacked Danny Baker

REVEALED: Why the BBC sacked Danny Baker from his brilliant daily afternoon show on London 95.9FM. The Danny Baker Treehouse has been felled:

1. “We dwell amid pinheaded weasels who know only timid, the generic and the abacus.” – Danny Baker

2. Global warming

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Posted: 1st, November 2012 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comments (2)

Farewell Ceefax: How Internet killed the television star

FAREWELL then, Ceefax; your Legoland graphics will delight and inform us no more. You were called Ceefax, because you enabled viewers “see the facts” with no messing about, and you became a national institution. But your birth was a happy accident.

As BBC engineers searched for a way to provide programme subtitles, they realised the same technology could be used to send other information.
Colin McIntyre led a team of eight at Television Centre in Shepherd’s Bush, monitoring the news wires. They typed up the stories, then produced a punched tape which was “read” by a machine into a “core store” with a maximum capacity of just 24 pages.

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Posted: 31st, October 2012 | In: Flashback, Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comment

Doomsday Preppers await Armageddon: Battlestar Galactica for Jesus

FEAR not, humanity. When Armageddon comes, these folks are ready to create a new breed of human. It’s Battlestar Galactica for Jesus. Do you take your chances with the Bomb or live in a hole with these fine folks?


How can you become prepared for the end of the world?

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Posted: 30th, October 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Jimmy Savile and the blindfolded cow: Radio Ulster gets pranked

ON BBC Radio Ulster a caller says that when he was 8, Jimmy Savile (much much older than 8) fixed it for him to milk a cow blindfolded:

The BBC could not spot that prank because the BBC takes things in good faith and is an entirely wholesome outfit. It was pointed out to Radio Ulster’s by a worker at ITV, which really is a sink of depravity…

Posted: 29th, October 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (2)

Bird poos on TV news reporter Paul Robins

HERE’S Fox40 Sacramento newsman Paul Robins getting pooed on by a bird. (A pigeon? Has to be. And Robins – more nominative determinism?)  His co-star Bethany Crouch is understandably amused. Still, the bird could have been more creative:

Posted: 26th, October 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

How to talk like a Neanderthal

HOW to talk like a Neanderthal with voice coach Patsy Rodenburg, director of voice at the Guildhall School of Music and Drama.

Posted: 26th, October 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Destination Star Trek London: Five captain, Bakula’s arse and Stewart’s nepotism

READER Stevie heads to Star Trek London 19th -21st October 2012

OK, so, screwing the Health and Safety Regulations there we were, thousands crammed into a far too small concrete box, on incredibly uncomfortable chairs, waiting for all 5 Captains to do the £95 opening 45-minute gig together -insert squee here- when they broke the bad news to us: John Barrowman was going to do the questioning. Someday John Barrowman will refrain from dropping his trousers, but it was not this day, and Scott Bakula’s self sacrifice in autographing John’s butt was deeply appreciated, particularly by Kate Mulgrew who wasn’t going to touch that one with a bargepole.

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Posted: 24th, October 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Household tool uses gun to make Halloween pumpkin

COMMON household tool uses gun to make Halloweeen pumpkin. He puts the anus in Janus:

Posted: 24th, October 2012 | In: TV & Radio | Comment

Chris Matthews shuts down the Obama debate

TV nodding Chris Matthews browse the political thinkers for a view.  On lad tells him he will be voting for Romney because “he doesn’t cover up scandals in the Middle East”.

Matthews, who has invited the voter to speak, then harasses him: “What was the scandal? Get to it, nail it, what was the scandal?”

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Posted: 24th, October 2012 | In: Politicians, TV & Radio | Comment

Ceefax and Teletext RIP

BEFORE the internet, there was a whole world of information to be found on Ceefax and Teletext. These blocky, but comfortingly amateurish graphics would adorn our pages with TV listings, horoscopes, music news and games. Bamboozle is surely one of the first interactive games a generation played? Channel 4 had Planet Sound, with John Earls heading up the editorial and providing a trusted, fanzine-style voice which music fans would devour with their Coco Pops on their TVs previously meant only for their Spectrums and Commodore 64s.

The BBC’s Ceefax was a little more safe than what could be found on other channels, but by no means loved any less.

Even though the whole thing looked hopelessly out of date in an age where video games are hyper-real and the internet is the place filled with every kind of graphic and photo you could hope for, there’s elements of Ceefax and Teletext that haven’t been bettered.

For example, the Now And Next (p120 or p606) television guide feature was a thing of wonder, minimising itself at the foot of the screen, allowing you to continue to watch television while weighing up which channel to hop to. And of course, subtitling was a glorious leap forward, with captioning on Freeview and Sky basically copying what Ceefax had done before.

For many, Teletext and Ceefax won’t mean a thing, but for that generation that truly embraced it, its passing should bring back a host of memories. Pressing ‘reveal’ on pages with no answer was always a thing people did, revealing stray code and such. Then there was the button which allowed you to enter a four number code, rather than the usual three. Stoners and the bored would endlessly tap in random digits in a bid to find secret pages. And this writer DID, and it appeared to be something to do with a premium rate phone game, regrettably.

It goes without saying that this old technology had to go, surpassed by the infinitely more useful internet. Smartphones and tablets effectively made Ceefax redundant. But that’s not to say we shouldn’t pay small tribute. After all, if it wasn’t for Nightscreen and the like, many of us would never have heard any jazz or muzak, ever.

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Posted: 23rd, October 2012 | In: Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comment

George Entwhistle was in the Darling Buds of May (video)

GEORGE Entwhistle has appeared before a parliamentary panel to talk about why Newsnight dropped its investigation into Jimmy Savile. Entwhistle is the BBC’s Director-General. Before that he was an actor, playing Cedric “Charley” Charlton under the nom-de-thesp ‘Philip Franks’ in the euphemistic Darling Buds of May (the sick perverts):

Posted: 23rd, October 2012 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment (1)

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