Anorak

TV & Radio | Anorak - Part 20

TV & Radio Category

Television and radio programme reviews, trailers, highlights, twilights and cinema news. Also the neglected gems from years past.

CNN says Hong Kong is in Brazil (photo)

THE average American is smarter than CNN’s killer hornet map expert, who managed to local Hong Kong in Brazil.

As Brazil’s giant hornet community says: “Visit China before China visits you.”

CNN fail

Posted: 8th, October 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Agents of S.H.I.E.LD is terrific – watch it while Simon Cowell licks his eyeballs

agents of shield

Mic Wright’s Remotely Furious.

NO one calls themselves a telly addict any more. Time was, that was a thing. In the ‘80s being yoked to the idiot box was a bad thing. But today? We covet screens endlessly. We carry them around with us all the time. Right now I have two monitors in front of me, a MacBook Air demanding my attention, a Google Nexus 7 chirping away to itself and a smartphone gone the way of a black mirror, its battery worn down by incessant fiddling. The screens are everywhere now. We don’t notice them because they surround us.

And I love it. My name is Mic Wright and I am an addict. I am unrepentant. I was born to be a telly critic but sadly telly isn’t what it used to be. When Clive James – the greatest TV reviewer of all time – was stalking the Palaeolithic expanses of the small screen, a world where Channel 4 was just a glimmer in some priapic executives hungry eye, television meant something. It had Play For Today and hard hitting documentaries. World In Action, Death on the Rock, truly panoramic Panorama. It had drunks and eccentrics. It had George Best, Muhammad Ali, Greta Garbo and Helen Mirren on Parkinson. It had The Tube and TOTP. It had surprises.

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Posted: 8th, October 2013 | In: Key Posts, TV & Radio | Comment (1)


Only in Scotland: Scotland’s loudest tap (featuring Lulu and Mel Gibson’s Brave Heart)

ONLY In Scotland presents: Scotland’s loudest tap. With impressions of Glasgow’s Lulu, Edinburgh’s mating pandas and Mel Gibson’s Brave Heart being eviscerated by the Sassenachs. More here.

Posted: 8th, October 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Conlangs: looking at the language of Lord of the Rings, Game of Thrones, Avatar and Star Trek

HOW invented are the languages you heard in Lord of the Rings, Avatar, Game of Throne and Star Trek?

In this TED Ed lessonJohn McWhorter talks of  “conlangs” (constructed languages), the languages of the including Klingon, Dothraki, Na’vi and the Elvish spoken in The Lord of the Rings’ Middle Earth:

“Tolkien charted out ancient and newer versions of Elvish. When the first Elves awoke at Cuiviénen, in their new language the word for people was kwendi, but in the language of one of the groups that moved away, Teleri, over time kwendi became pendi. Just like real languages, conlangs like Elvish split off into many. When the Romans transplanted Latin across Europe, French, Spanish, and Italian were born.”

There’s more on this sort of thing at the Language Creation Society.

 Conlanging is the creation of constructed languages or conlangs, such as Esperanto, Lojban, or Klingon. A conlanger is someone who creates or constructs languages or conlangs. 

Tirme to meet David Peterson, who developed Dothraki for Game of Thrones:

Posted: 7th, October 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Nominative determinism: Calum Wrist is a TV onanist

DID you catch Porn on the Brain, Channel’s 4’s insight into the effect smut has on the human head? Did you see the teenager who said he was addicted to online porn? You know… Calum Wrist.

More nominative determinism when we find it:

callum wrist

Posted: 3rd, October 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


The X Factor: the bisexual singer who doesn’t like boys

miss-dynamix

THE X Factor is the “BISEXUAL” Factor, as the Sun looks as X Factor warbler Shereece ‘Sese’ Foster.

The feisty singer — who Gary Barlow put together with two other wannabes to form a new group — said she loved girls’ BUMS.

But how bisexual is she?

 “I’m into girls, really. I don’t know what I am, I just know that if I see a female bum I feel like I have to grab it. I ask permission first.”

But how bisexual is she?

Sese, 22, added: “I don’t like boys or their bums.”

And on with the show…

Posted: 3rd, October 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


1991: Nirvana’s first televised performance of Smells Like Teen Spirit and Kurt is unplugged and contracted in a Radio Shack

TWENTY years ago, Nirvana released In Utero. Anorak bought it. And played it loud. In 1991, Nirvana appeared on MTV’s 120 Minutes to perform Smells Like Teen Spirit. Grunge went mainstream.

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Posted: 1st, October 2013 | In: Flashback, Music, TV & Radio | Comment


What if Breaking Bad was made in the UK?

WHAT is Breaking Bad had been made in the UK?

breaking bad in the UK

Note: Mister White is on a zero hours contract and no longer has a job.

 

Posted: 27th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Man suffers from alien leg cramp

CRAMP. Really bad cramp:

 

 

Posted: 27th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Liverpool local walks home in the traditional fashion (video)

TO Liverpool, to see a drunk man walk home in the traditional manner.

Language is sweary.

Madness:

drunk walking

 

Posted: 27th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Mickey The baboon cops a feel (video)

TO the Lodi Grope Grape Festival, where Sabrina Rodriguez of Fox40 is reporting live. The local representative of the BBC DJs Society is there to greet her.

Spotter: HyperVocal

Posted: 25th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Jimmy Savile stands in for Chris Evans on BBC Radio 2

chris evans

THE Daily Mail reports that “DJ Chris Evans has courted controversy after impersonating serial sex predator Jimmy Savile live on air to nearly 10 million listeners”.

Impersonating Jimmy Savile involves:

a) being dead

b) grabbing hold of children

c) becoming aPapal knight

d) looking like an identikit nonce

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Posted: 25th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, TV & Radio | Comment


Sex Box: Channel 4 to broadcast people silently shagging in a plastic box

sex box

CHANNEL 4 are going to show a programme that will feature couples having sex in a sound-proofed box in a TV studio with audience, which isn’t sinister version of The Cube at all.

Three couples (two straight and one gay) will take turns to step into the box before being asked questions by host Mariella Frostrup and a panel of hooting sex experts in the new show Sex Box.

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Posted: 24th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Selfish vicar ruins wedding to set God on photographers

HOW to ruin a wedding Number 432: get the intolerant vicar to interrupt the service to tell the photogaphers recording it for posterity to go under God’s orders:

Posted: 24th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


X Factor: cutting Hannah Sheares and Dermot O’Leary’s knob watch

daisy chains

WHY do you watch the X Factor?

Is it to see The Daisy Chains, the trio who told us “Because if just one of us is broken, we don’t work”? Their fans will hope the band reform after the more talented* member Hannah Sheares (* prettiest and thinnest) ditched her pals and went solo a few milliseconds after Gary Barlow had told her: “You have the potential to go far, but on your own.”

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Posted: 24th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Black rhino survives encounter with TV crew

THIS video features cameraman Kim Wolhuter in a stand-off with a black rhino. Kim survives. As does the rhino.

I wonder what the rhino has to say about the encounter, perhaps that he met a man stood in his path and decided that charging him would be foolhardy because if he hurt the human others humans in the big truck to the left would kill him. His cousin is an authority on human behaviour and will include this episode in his university thesis: why do white humans stare and collect our excrement?

Posted: 24th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


The five greatest home shopping TV fails of all time

ANROAK loves watching Home shopping channels. Every now and then you get a memorable moment:

The Ladder To (Seeing) Stars

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Posted: 23rd, September 2013 | In: The Consumer, TV & Radio | Comment


Getty Dubs: stock videos with added sounds to make you laugh

THIS is a compilation of stock videos from Getty Images dubbed with sounds to make you laugh:

Spotter: Getty Dubs, via BlameItOnTheVoices

Posted: 22nd, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Baby misses dad’s beard (video)

BABY misses dad’s beard (video):

Spotter

 

Posted: 22nd, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Is Syria a sign that End of Times is upon us? Fox News v Channel 4

IS war in Syria a sign that the End of Times is upon is. Has the end of the world begun?

Fox News

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Posted: 22nd, September 2013 | In: Reviews, TV & Radio | Comment


BBC News presenter can’t tell the difference between an iPad or a stack of paper

LIVE TV is a treacherous thing at the best of times, as a BBC News presenter fond out when he delivered a bulletin holding a pack of photocopier paper instead of an iPad.

Simon McCoy was doing his thing to camera, talking about ‘drunk tanks’ (not nearly as exciting as they sound) when he accidentally picked up a stack of A4 paper instead of his tablet.

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Posted: 18th, September 2013 | In: Technology, TV & Radio | Comment


Penguin designs bride’s wedding dress

SO. The bride and groom are with a penguin. What could go wrong:

Posted: 18th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


BBC moves towards quotas for women in broadcasting: abbatoir workers, as you were

AliceArnoldSHOULD there be quotas for men and women? If men are under-represented on a board of panel, should there be more men? Alice Arnold, the former BBC Radio 4 newsreader and BBC presenter Clare Balding’s civil partner, has said that a “quota for female radio hosts is the only way to achieve equality”.

Do we need quotas to ensure more woman work in abattoirs and road building? What about more men on make-up counters and supermarket check-outs? Quotas?

Tony Hall, the BBC’s Director General, says:

“We have got to be more reflective of the audiences who are listening to our programmes. That is why by the end of 2014 I would like to see half of our Local Radio stations with a woman presenting on the Breakfast shows.”

Arnold says:

“Without a directive of a quota from above, the figure of 50 per cent will simply never be achieved. Not because there are not good women out there, there are plenty, but they have to be sought out and given the opportunity…Women broadcasters are as good as male broadcasters. This is a fact. But we are fighting a history of sexism in broadcasting and in life that has gone on ever since the transistor radio took pride of place in the parlour.”

Won’t it be just as sexist to make rules that bar men from doing a job?

Posted: 16th, September 2013 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Superstars and Superfans: Paul Burrell is now as Royal as Princess Diana

Paul Burrell, Princess Diana's former butler, looks at a long, formal dinner dress in oyster duchesse satin, with a bolero jacket by Victor Edelstein that belonged to the Princess of Wales, in New York Monday Aug. 13, 2007. At left is the dress, valued at over $300,000 that is being offered on eBay through August 22, with proceeds going to the America's Promise charity which raises money for disadvantaged children. Burrell is returning as a judge for the second season of the WE cable television channel reality series "American Princess." At left is a positive negative black and white evening dress and bolero jacket by Murray Arbeid, second left is a long, formal dinner dress in oyster duchesse satin, with a bolero jacket by Victor Edelstein and at right is a long evening dress of back silk crepe and diamante paste embroidery by Catherine Walker, both of which also belonged to Princess Diana. (AP Photo/Richard Drew)

PAUL Burrell is plugging his TLC show Superstars and Superfans.

From the makers of Sky1’s Pineapple Dance Studios, Superstars and Superfans follows the lives of some of the UK’s most dedicated and obsessed celebrity fans, providing a glimpse into the eccentric world of these real-life celebrity devotees, while also delving deep into the lives of the celebrities over whom the superfans obsess. What happens when their worlds collide?

But:

This series we meet superfans including Jax who has an obsession with Shane Lynch from Boyzone and has an ‘Aladdin’s cave’ dedicated to all things Shane Lynch, she even has her very own personal fantasy world – “Lynch Land” where she meets Shane and plays out their would-be life together, Victoria whose obsession revolves around Westlife, she has created her very own Westlife ‘hall of fame’ in her hallway, dubbed the Westlife Passage with pictures of her favourite stars, and Theresa whose obsession with Rod Stewart has seen her attend over 150 of his concerts and keeps a momentum of each one in her ‘Rod Room.’

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Posted: 16th, September 2013 | In: Celebrities, Royal Family, TV & Radio | Comment


Teen Exorcists: Bob Larson, Margaret Thatcher and hunting Satan for Jesus in London

thatcher devil satan

A COUPLE of nights ago, BBC3 (the network’s “youth channel”) broadcast Dan Murdoch‘s observational documentary Teen Exorcists, the latest example of media fascination with Brynne Larson and her two friends Brynne Tess and Savannah Scherkenback, writes Richard BartholomewThe trio come across as personable, good humoured, and bright – yet they are committed to the beliefs and worldview expounded by Brynne’s father Bob Larson, a man who has been a familiar figure in US media for years with extravagant tales of Satanic cults and of exorcising thousands of people who he says have been spiritually oppressed by demonic powers.

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Posted: 15th, September 2013 | In: Strange But True, TV & Radio | Comment