Osama’s Hair Salon Becomes Obama’s

ANORAK’s man in the US, sends news of the hair salon formerly known as Osama’s and now called Obama’s:

Obama’s Hair Design

Anorak

Posted: 7th, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment

Syrian Man In Turkey Tries To Kill Obama

THE Turkish chapter of the Barack Obama Death Cult is open.

As reported (he-he):

“Turkey foils plot to assassinate

Obama”

Turkish security services have arrested a man of Syrian descent who was planning to assassinate US President Barack Obama during his current trip to Turkey, the Saudi daily Al Watan reported Monday.

According to the report, the man, who was arrested on Friday, was carrying a press card identifying him as an employee of Al Jazeera. He reportedly confessed to his intention to stab Obama with a knife and said that he was aided by three accomplices.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment

Cheerio Obama

BARACK Obama will appease? Cheerio!

Anorak

Posted: 6th, April 2009 | In: Money, Politicians | Comment (1)

Obama Learns To Speak Austrian

BARACK Obama is no George Bush. When Obama asks for more troops, the allies say no. When Obama meets world leaders he contorts. And when speaking to Austrians, he laments the fact that he can’t speak Austrian:

At a news conference afterward, Obama said his debut on the international stage had convinced him that “political interaction in Europe is not that different from the United States Senate,” where he served before entering the White House.

“There’s a lot of — I don’t know what the term is in Austrian — wheeling and dealing, and people are pursuing their interests, and everybody has their own particular issues and their own particular politics,” he said in response to an Austrian reporter’s question.

Anorak

Posted: 6th, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (8)

Obama Contorts For Abdullah

BARACK Obama nods to Her Majesty. Barack Obama moons for Abdullah.

Greater WIngnuttia is all alarums and excursions because Obama “bowed down” before KIng Abdullah of Saudi Arabia; they’ve even done the hard research and checked Miss Manners to prove that this portends the immediate imposition of sharia law all throughout the American Heartland. Of course, when you watch the video that Malkin claims proves Obama was kowtowing to the Muslim Monarch, you note that Obama is about a foot taller than Abdullah, and so had to kind of contort himself to get into any sort of position to shake the sheikh’s hand.

Anorak

Posted: 5th, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)

Man Who Feared Obama Would Ban Guns Kills Three Cops

IN Pittsburgh, Richard Poplawski has murdered three police officers during a domestic disturbance call. Poplawski feared that Barack Obama would ban guns.

Police did not immediately release the gunman’s identity, but his friends identified him as Richard Poplawski, 23. They described him as a young man who thought the Obama administration would ban guns.

Anorak

Posted: 4th, April 2009 | In: Reviews | Comments (16)

Even Guardian Now Mocks Obama

HOW can we satirise Barack Obama? It’s easy – so easy even the Guardian is doing it. John Crace:

Anorak

Posted: 4th, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (2)

Obama Has Russian Word For Dick On Palm Of Hand

BARACK Obama Has Russian Word for “Dick” On Palm Of His Hand:

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment

Obama Insults Brazilian President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva

ANOTHER day and another moment to realise that Obama is the one man who still believes his own hype. Here is The One insulting Brazilian President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva:

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment

Barack Obama Moons Queen Repects King Abdullah

BARACK Obama mnight just about be the last person left to believe his own hype.

Compare and contrast his meeting with the sexy Her Majesty Queen of England, head of his nation’s great ally and champion of democracy – a nod and “Yeah – ha-ha – whatever”:

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (2)

Queen ‘Tongues’ Michelle Obama

HER Majesty the Queen and Michelle Obama have come together – it being what Jade would have wanted.

Anorak

Posted: 3rd, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment

Michelle Obama Touched By Queen

THE Queen has been touched by Michelle Obama.

Says Liz:

“I’m touched.”

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (3)

Obama And Brown: A Love Story In Pictures, With Anal Poisoning

BARACK Obama and Gordon Brown – but it is love? Dear Deirdre…

In a blaze of dazzling light from above, disciples witness the First Coming of Obama – The Times

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment

Barack Obama Swallows The Polypill

BARACK Obama – a look at how we can get Barack Obama into news story, with the polypill…

It’s been a dream for a decade: a single daily pill combining aspirin, cholesterol medicine and blood pressure drugs — everything people need to prevent heart attacks and strokes in a cheap, generic form.

Read the rest of this entry »

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)

Queen Introduces Obama To Her Dogs

“WE’RE not all like them, Mr President,” says the Sun’s front-page headline, words attributed to Her Majesty the Queen and set alongside a shot of the Lone Ranger’s stylist kicking in a pane of glass in the City of London.

No, Mr President Obama. Some of us are filthy rich and use guns and packs of dogs. Release the hounds!

Anorak

Posted: 2nd, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (4)

Obama Gives Queen An iPod

BARACK Obama is a satirist, giving cheap trinkets and shiny things to the people of Ye Olde England and other lands, those islands off the coast of the world. Ha.

He can’t buy us. Although, throw in an alcopop and a feel, and we’ll talk.

Obama has met the Queen at Buckingham Palace and gave her a gift of an iPod. On it was not the Arctic Monkeys but video footage and stills of her 2007 United States visit to Richmond, Jamestown and Williamsburg in Virginia.

Anorak

Posted: 1st, April 2009 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)

Obama Meets The Muppets

BARACK Obama meets the muppets, and other British leaders fallen on hard times…

Anorak

Posted: 1st, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment

The Barack Obama List Of Tax Dodgers

BARACK Obama is all for redistribution. The problem is, how to redistribute what you don’t have and they aren’t that keen to tell you they have?

Here’s a list of Obams crack tem of tax dodger spotters, all on hand to explain to Obama how some people don’t pay up:

Before that, know that the US Is In The in the Veryt Best of Hands:

Read the rest of this entry »

Anorak

Posted: 1st, April 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment

Barack Obama requests visit West Ham’s stadium

AS if he didn’t already a busy enough G20 schedule, Barack Obama has set aside a couple of hours to pay a visit to Upton Park, home of West Ham United.

Obama is a self-confessed West Ham fan, since a visit to Britain six years ago – some of his English relatives are Hammers, prompting the U.S. President to adopt the club as his go-to Premier League team.

This afternoon, after French leader Nicolas Sarkozy  and Germanys’ Angela Merkel have held a press conference, Obama will be whisked by helicopter to east London, where he will be given a half-hour tour of Upton Park by manager Gianfranco Zola. Obama will then return for his meeting with the Queen at Buckingham Palace, at 5.30pm.

Good to see he has his priorities straight.

Anorak

Posted: 1st, April 2009 | In: Sports | Comments (3)

Learning To Laugh at Obama

JAY Leno on The Tonight Show is going spazmo for Obama jokes:

PRESIDENT Obama said this week that things will get worse before they get better. That’s something you never hear before the election. “Let me tell you, if I’m elected it’s going to get a lot worse.” (He) has announced a taskforce to review the tax codes.

He’s concerned there are too many loopholes and too many people manipulating the system to avoid paying taxes. And that’s just in his administration.

Anorak

Posted: 31st, March 2009 | In: Politicians | Comment (1)

The G20 In Numbers

THE G20 in numbers…

1 – Rule for them and not for us

G19 – Major economic powers

G20 – 19 plus the EU, and Thailand and Ethiopia

Education, education, education…

Anorak

Posted: 31st, March 2009 | In: Politicians | Comments (2)

Celebrities Shun Jade Goody

EARLY reports were that Michael Jackson would be attending Jade’s Goody funeral.

Old Mr Anorak keeps a picture of Jackson above his desk – the one of Jackson and Elizabeth Taylor at David Gest’s marriage to Liza Minneli that suggests all three are melting over a giant candle. OMA says the picture reminds him of his fourth wife during her three-day weekender at Messers Nip ‘n’ Tuck’s clinic.

But now a veil hangs over the image. News reaches us that Jackson will not be at the big Jade party.

Anorak

Posted: 30th, March 2009 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (3)

Police Stop G20 Plot To Kill Barack Obama

ALL over the media is the news that five have been arrested in a G20 “bomb plot”.

Police in Plymouth are said to have uncovered a cache of weapons and “material relating to political ideology”. (The south-west is a hotbed of terror!)

The Tory Blue Book is dangerous reading?

Anorak

Posted: 30th, March 2009 | In: Key Posts, Politicians | Comment

Fox News Says After Obama Comes The Devil

TV news is all about cementiong prejudices. Fox News’ line-up has a money show followed by a look at Satan and ending – with all the evidence in – with look a at Obama…

It’s a theme night.

Anorak

Posted: 28th, March 2009 | In: Photojournalism, Reviews | Comment

Hollywood Legend Killed In Dakota Floods

THOSE floods in Dakota have a celebrity element – a Hollywood legend has been drowned…

Send for Barack Obama – he’ll No-ah what to do…

Anorak

Posted: 27th, March 2009 | In: Celebrities | Comment