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Day 2 of the Sun’s monstering of David Nicholson, the Basingstoke school headmaster accused of using school computers to contact prostitutes. Having read that Mr Nicholson never did have sex or spank either of the women he allegedly contacted on school time, we learn on page 12:
“Hookers head shocks mums”
Are those the mums into 50 Shades of spanking or all mums? Afte rall, it was the Sun that reported: “SEX-MAD Brits can’t wait to watch Fifty Shades Of Grey – so they can copy the kinky moves back in their own bedrooms.”
Jonathan Reilly writes, “PARENTS reacted with shock after a head was suspended for sending X-rated messages to two escorts on his school email.”
Shock that such a small story – a thought offence – could ruin a man’s career?
They spoke of their horror yesterday after The Sun revealed David Nicholson arranged a schoolgirl-themed threesome.
The headline (“MADDIE – CALL OFF HUNT, WE NEED COPS IN UK”) looks at how the £10m spent in finding out what happened to the child occupies 31 Met police detectives. The Star says these resources are “ring-fenced”, preventing the Maddie cops from working on other cases, such as the “14 unconnected killings” across London.
Readers are told that officers are “baffled” why so many police are on one case that has so far turend up not a single clue, no evidence and zero proof as to what happned to the child.
Metropolitan Police Federation chairman John Tully says:
“It is time to refocus…we no longer have the resources to conduct special inquiries all over the world which have nothing to do with London… But we have £600m of cuts… It is surprising to see an inquiry like the McCann investigation ring-fenced… there is resentment of significant resources diverted to a case that has no apparent connection with London.”
His grumble is more to do with falling police investment than the McCann case. But £10m is a fortune for a case that has progressed not one inch.
But it won’t stop. Not now…
In “Head hires hooker to dress as schoolgirl – EXCLUSIVE: Top Sir probed over sordid texts”, the Sun zooms in on “married dad” David Nicholson, 48. The front-page story goes that Nicholson, a headteacher at Costello School in Basingstoke, Hampshire, allegedly used his work computer to send “one hooker X-rated messages”.
Readers get to know that one woman is 34DD. And they get to read the alleged exchange:
She: “I like dressing up like a schoolgirl and being spanked.”
He: “I love this and would be keen. I will stay in a hotel. Looking forward to putting you over my knee.”
How does an orthodoxy take hold? When designers Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana shared their views on love, sex, romance, gay marriage, children, IVF babies and children of same-sex couples the media and celebrity voices united in condeming them, siding with Elton John, who expressed his displeasure with a shrill call to boycott the brand.
The Daily Mirror has carried this news on its front page:
“Elton – I will never wear Dolce & Gabbana again after they dared call my kids synthetic”
Elton, who with his husband David Furnish is father to IVF-conceived sons Elijah and Zach, appeared over two more pages. It was “Elton’s fury” at an “astonishing attack”.
Elton said: “How dare you refer to my beautiful children as synthetic?”
But they were synthesized? This is how the BBC explains IVF to GCSE students:
If a couple are having difficulty conceiving a child because the quantity or quality of the man’s sperm is poor then IVF can be used. This is where the egg is fertilised outside the woman’s body and then implanted back into her uterus. As FSH can also be used to encourage the production of several mature eggs at once, it is used as part of IVF to increase the number of eggs available for fertilisation.
Some people worry about the ethical implications of IVF. They are concerned that couples may want ‘designer babies’ with ‘desirable’ qualities, so may only want certain fertilised eggs. For example, they may want a girl if they have lots of boys in the family, or they may wish to avoid producing a baby with an inherited defect.
Elton goes on:
And shame on you for wagging your judgemental fingers at IVF… a miracle that has allowed legions of loving people both stright and gay, to fulfil their dream of having children. Your archaic thinking is out of step with the times, just like your fashions. I shall never wear Dolce & Gabbana ever again. #BoycottDolceGabbana.
At which point anyone not laughing or thinking Chris Morris was writing the news should dash out and buy armfuls of D&G schmutters. Do they do a kids’ range? If they do, buy that, too. Elton John wants people who are judgemental banned. And – irony of irony – many voices on Twitter, that paragon of intolerance and incoherence, agree.
When 17-year-old Australian Islamic State fighter, Jake Bilardi, died in a suicide bombing attack, we all saw the photo. There was Jake in his Chelsea kit.
Cheslea’s marketing men must have been delighted by the repeated exposure Bilardi has given their brand.
Fans of other clubs can only smirk when they see a miscreant wearing a rival team’s kit.
When Craig Meehan was arrested during the Shannon Matthews affair, he was photgpahed in his Manchester United kit. Meehan was subsequently convicted of possessing indecent images of children on a computer found in the home he shared with Karen Matthews.
If you see an embarrassing endorsement, please let us know at @theanorak on twittter.
Westminster paedophiles: a look at reporting on allegations that VIPs abused and murdered children in the 1970s and 1980s.
The Daily Mirror brings news: “VIP paedophile scandal: Police pinpoint ‘dungeon’ flat linked to abuse parties and child murder”
Keir Mudie and Mark Conrad report that police have “identified a luxury flat in Pimlico, London, which is connected to a large cellar believed to have been used as a ‘holding area’ for abuse victims”.
The Australian Daily Telegraph calls Furkan Derya.
Tim Blair’s story “Jihadi Bilardi spreading the hate in his own way” focused on the Australian teenager who relocated his angst to ISIS, one Jake Bilardi.
You can use it if you like. We double derya.
The Daily Express often leads with news of diabetes cures. In 2014, the Express told its reads that diabetes had been cured by cheese, jabs, chocolate, pills and sunshine. Today the paper says diabetes can be prevented by…sleeping.
But take not to sleep for too long. Thirty minutes more sleep is the recipe for good health, taking your nightly kip to eight hours. A minute longer and you are dead. Because too much sleep could kill you!
ews of a teenager stabbed to death outside a Coventry nightclub is reported thus in the Daily Mirror:
Sick revellers ‘took photos of teenager dying from stab wounds and posted them on SnapChat’
Those “revellers” are unlikley have been revelling in a young’s man death outside Society nightclub in Coventry. And as for spotting the sickos, might that not be a word best used to describe the victim’s killer or killers?
Do we know yet which side we are rooting for in the Syrian civil war? Once upon a time we are anti-Assad. Then we realised that some of the barrel-bombing dictator’s enemies were not our friends because they started to decapitate and burn people alive in snuff movies starring Islamic State’s leading video blogger Jihadi John. We had thought out best bet were the Kurds, who if not exactly holding the gates of Vienna were laying claim to land they were prepared to fight for.
And then we read of British teenage girl Shilan Ozcelik, 18. She’s been arrested for allegedly trying to fight for the glorious Kurds against Islamic State.
She might be a hero were it not for the British police.
To St Joseph’s Roman Catholic Primary School in Devizes, Wiltshire, where God is on the phone.
There is talk of “outrage” that headmistress Sheila Jones “humiliated children” by standing in the school’s prayer room and telling God via her mobile phone that the children had misbehaved.
Some parents have called Ofsted, who have asked Wiltshire Council’s safeguarding team to investigate.
The story of Prince Andrew and the underage ‘sex slave’ Victoria Roberts has down the British media’s newscycle. But elsewhere it nags on. Roberts claims to have shagged Prince Andrew three times while working as Jeffrey Epstein’s ‘masseuse’. Andrew denies it. All we know for certain is that they’ve met.
Over in the US, the Daily Caller has more on the billionaire and convicted sexual deviant Jeffrey Epstein:
While Bill and Hillary Clinton may have cut off Jeffrey Epstein, the billionaire convicted pedophile friend of Bill’s, Epstein’s chief procurer of teens for sex with Epstein and his A-list sex crime cronies, a woman named Ghislaine Maxwell, remains an intimate of the Clintons and is running a program funded by the Clinton Slush Fund a.k.a. The Clinton Foundation.
Ghislaine Maxwell, daughter of disgraced tycoon Robert Maxwell who died in mysterious cicumstances, is alleged to have introduced Andrew to Epstein. But as for being a madame, she denies all allegations.
Have we let the murderous goons of Islamic State infect out minds? In Italy, police were called when a local spotted an Isis flag hanging outside an apartment building.
They called the police because they saw a flag. Incredible.
But the really sad thing is that the police responded, racing over to the apartment block in Porto Recanati, on Italy’s eastern coast. The police searched the building and questioned residents. They then noted that the ISIS flag was a jacket that had been blown into the trees after being hung out to dry.
Smiley, a golden retriever, was born without eyes. He lives in Stouffville, Canada, working as a St. John’s Ambulance service dog. Smiley’s owner, Joanne George, rescued him from a puppy mill, when he was about 1 year old.
She introduced him to a deaf Great Dane named Tyler: She says:
“He was very scared, [the dogs] had never been out of that barn… Tyler was so bouncy and crazy and happy go lucky and [Smiley] turned into the same dog. He came out from underneath the tables where he was always hiding.”
She thought Smiley would make a good therapy dog.
“There was this man Teddy, [he had] no speech, no communication at all. [The staff] had never seen Teddy smile before. [He] smiled when Smiley got into his vision.”
If that doesn’t make you feel better about your day, nothing will…
On Flashbak the story of Stetson Kennedy, the campaigning journalist who infiltrated the Klu Klux Klan in the 1940s and exposed their members to ridicule. He didn’t do it alone. He got Superman to help…
Read it all here.
Southampton University’s debate on the State of Israel is called International Law and the State of Israel. The blurb runs:
This conference will be the first of its kind and constitutes a ground-breaking historical event on the road towards justice and enduring peace in historic Palestine. It is unique because it concerns the legitimacy in International Law of the Jewish state of Israel. Rather than focusing on Israeli actions in the 1967 Occupied Territories, the conference will focus on exploring themes of Legitimacy, Responsibility and Exceptionalism; all of which are posed by Israel’s very nature.
And there you are. It is not about peace or the two-state solution. It’s is about a one-state solution which means making Israel an illegal country. It is a biased and bigotted conference more loaded than George Bush at a frat party. But it should go ahead.
Madeleine McCann: a look at reporting on the missing child in the news.
The Daily Star has news on Page 11:
“Dad of Kidnapped Girls: Don’t Give Up Hope Over Maddie”
Morne and Celeste Nurse’s daughter was kidnapped from hospital in 1997 when she was three days old. The woman suspected of stealing the child is “understood” to have suffered a stillbirth before her crime. She is not thought to be a threat to society because she has been released on police bail.
First they said you can’t smoke in the bar. Then they said you can’t smoke in the park. East Lancashire NHS Trust bans anyone – the stressed and the suicidal included – from smoking inside and outside its mental-health facilities. Now Washington DC’s Edwin Gray has been banned from smoking inside his own home. No-one he lives with him in what has been the family home for 50 years minds his smoking marijuana or tobacco.
What is the happiest age of your life? No need to answer because the ‘Daily Mail Reporter’ knows. It’s 34.
It used to be 33. But Suzannah Hills’ report for the Daily Mail is past its sell-by date.
We’re agreed, then. 37 it is. We’re happiest at 37. So says Katy Winter in the…Daily Mail:
We don’t know how old the Daily Mail Reporter is but we do know that they are covering their bases. Because they told us that the happiest ages are…38 and 40:
It’s all downhill after 40. Or is it. Because the Daily Mail has great news. The happiest age is… 58!
But what about the older readers? Can they be happy, too? Yes, they can! Because the happiest age is 69 (and 29)!
That’s not old. What about us? What about the 85-year-olds. Can we be happy? Yes!
Such are the facts…
Sarah Ditum writes on Jeremy Clarkson, the journalist suspended from presenting Top Gear amid allegations that he punched a BBC colleague.
She writes in the New Statesman beneath the headline:
We live in a world of stupid and Jeremy Clarkson is its king
Eat yer heart out Jihadi John, Vladimir Putin and Barack Obama. It’s not hate, greed and vanity that rule the world, it’s stupid King Clarkson.
And if he is stupid, then so are you for liking him. All of you:
…Clarkson, the hulkingly recognisable, braying everyman face of a show that’s broadcast in 214 territories worldwide, to an audience of 350 million…
Stupid. All of you.
We also know that a lot of people don’t care whether he lamped his producer, because 350,000 and some (at the time of writing; it will be more, much more, by the end of the day) have signed a Change.org petition demanding his reinstatement. And this is not because they hold a dear attachment to due process, and misguidedly think that any action should only follow the investigation. It’s because they like the fact that Jeremy Clarkson is the kind of celebrity they can imagine punching a much less powerful colleague.
Having stated that people who support and like Clarkson have scant regard for the law, are in favour of bullying, enjoy casual violence and have minds so thin they can each be read by a woman sat at a keyboard – whilst ignoring the facts that this “less powerful collegue” seems powerful enough to have gotten Clarkson banned – Ditum mocks the kind of people who sign shrill online petitions.
At which point we find accord. Anyone who expects change from Change.org is kidding themselves. It’s just an echo chamber for monocular like minds, more akin to the modern Labour Party and Switzerland than a march on Selma.
Then Ditum moves towards the people she says support violence – before charging way, way past them, past even the flaming cages where ISIS nutjobs sit:
I don’t wish to sound extremist, but I have no doubt that if every signatory to this petition were boiled down for biofuel, the world would be a cleaner, smarter place.
To illustrate just how far removed Ditum is from Clarkson’s brand of comedy that mocks the poor and sneers at funny foreingers, she suggests the world would be a better place if 350,000 untermensch were murdered to give her world a pure green light.
Because the in-need-of-killing are “idiots in a world of idiocy”. And she is the snotty, superior judge, jury and executioner. You might not want to live in a Jeremy Clarkson’s world, but you have to wonder what planet Ditum is from?
YOU can libel an entire people, milions and millions of them. Did you know that all Indian males are suspected rapists? The Institute of Biochemistry at Leipzig University in Germany will not accept an innocent male Indian student’s internship application because hs is part of India’s “rape problem”.
Annette G Beck-Sickinger, professor of biochemistry, told the student via email:
“Unfortunately I don’t accept any Indian male students for internships. We hear a lot about the rape problem in India… I have many female students in my group, so I think this attitude is something I cannot support.”
Well, if you hear about it then it is better to err on the side of sense and caution. But in the inrtests if fairness, can Annette not offer him an appeal by castration?
Update: Beck-Sickinger has now apologised for being a monumenal, self-righteous fool. Well, sort of. She apologised for the “misunderstanding”.
Phone hacking: The Mirror ruined Steve McFadden’s love life, drove Paul Gascoigne to alcohol but murdered no-one
The phone hacking scandal calls EastEnders actor Steve McFadden. He says Daily Mirror stories while he was romancing co-star Lucy Benjamin (above) “destroyed” their love affair.
McFadden is at the High Court to help the judges decide the amount of compensation to be awarded against Mirror Group Newspapers (MGN). The trial will determine the range of phone hacking and the amount of damages due.
Two newspapers lead with news of Mohammed Emwazi, although both continue to refer to him as Jihadi John. As Emwazi tells people he is now ‘the murderous loon formerly known as Jihadi John’, the Daily Mail says Emwazi is a victim only of his own free will. No news there. But the Daily Star has something. It says
This suggests that being a jihadi is not a fulltime job. There is considerable downtime. And that means lots of telly. Although Teletubbies and Game of Thrones could be passed off as research for new ways to maim, torture and murder people. (Top Gear is too right-wing.)
Maybe the TV shows are a form of torture? Spooks and goons have used TV music to unhinge minds, so why not the whole shows?
In 2003, we learned that the CIA used music to extract information from internees in Iraq. Rick Hoffman, a veteran of US psychological operations told the BBC that tunes from Sesame Street and Barney The Dinosaur were harnessed to break the will of Iraqi captives. In 1989 American troops surrounded General Noriega’s residence and blasted, among other horrors, the songs of Rick Astley. In 1993 police hit David Koresh’s compound near Waco with Tibetan chants.
These sounds are billed as torture light “futility music”.
Former prisoner Haj Ali said hearing David Gray singing “Babylon… Babylon… Babylon… over and over again. It was so loud I thought my head would burst. It went on for a day and a night.”
Songs can get into your head and stay there.
In Touching the Void, the film based on Joe Simpson and Simon Yates’ epically disastrous attempt to ascend Siula Grande (6,344m) in the Cordillera Huayhuash in the Peruvian Andes in 1985, Simpson’s tired mind is assaulted by Boney M’s Brown Girl in the Ring. He thinks “Bloody hell, I’m going to die to Boney M”:
Psychologists call it an “earworm“. It is a thought that will “arrive without permission and refuse to leave when we tell them to”.
But how can you get them out of your head? Dr Ira Hyman, a music psychologist at Western Washington University has an idea:
“The key is to find something that will give the right level of challenge. If you are cognitively engaged, it limits the ability of intrusive songs to enter your head. Something we can do automatically like driving or walking means you are not using all of your cognitive resource, so there is plenty of space left for that internal jukebox to start playing. Likewise, if you are trying something too hard, then your brain will not be engaged successfully, so that music can come back. You need to find that bit in the middle where there is not much space left in the brain. That will be different for each individual. It is like a Goldilocks effect – it can’t be too easy and it can’t be too hard, it has got to be just right.”
And now on ISTV:
Padge-Victoria Windslowe is the self-styled “the Michelangelo of buttocks injections”. Like you high-brow readers, we know Michelangelo to be a teenage mutant ninja turtle who gets his energy to whoop ass from pizzas. In turns out that Windslowe was referencing the Vatican ceiling painter who made David with the tiny penis.
And it further transpires she was more Travis Perkins or Tony Hart than Michelangelo, because in 2011 Padge-Victoria killed 20-year-old Claudia Aderotimi during an illegal surgical procedure that involved industrial-grade silicone and Krazy Glue.
Windslowe has been convicted of murder.