Anorak

Mof Gimmers | Anorak - Part 49

Mof Gimmers - Author Archive

Is It Weird That Amy Winehouse’s Clothes Were Being Handed Out To Grievers?

AMY WINEHOUSE’S death wasn’t pleasant at all. It’s always terribly sad when a young person dies, regardless of status or dependency on drugs.

And the general response has been pretty touching … (read more)

Posted: 29th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comments (4)


Lauryn Hill Has Sixth Child, But No More Music And Seeks Privacy On Twitter

REMEMBER when Lauryn Hill was one of the most thrilling popstars on the planet. She could rap like a champ and had a voice that came straight outta Soulsville. Basically, … (read more)

Posted: 27th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Crystal Harris Is A Massive Liar Says Hugh ‘Rubbish In Bed’ Hefner

SURPRISED as you were about Crystal Harris dumping Hugh Hefner days before their wedding, there was always something vaguely odd about their relationship. Maybe it was the fact Hef was … (read more)

Posted: 27th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)


Michael Jackson’s Trial Won’t Have Video Thanks To Worried Businessmen

WHILE Michael Jackson’s relatives cash-in on the interest surrounding the imminent trial of Dr Conrad Murray and his magical propofol, everyone has eyes squarely on the courtroom.

Will it be televised? … (read more)

Posted: 26th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comments (6)


Glee Producers Realise That Firing The Famous Cast Isn’t Too Great An Idea

GLEEKS the world over where literally apoplectic with a vague sense of mild irritation when they heard the news that The Famous Ones from Glee were getting fired.

Of course, Lea … (read more)

Posted: 25th, July 2011 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


Arnold Schwarzenegger Won’t Be Supporting Shriver, Despite Their Son Being Nearly Dead

IT’S bad enough that Arnold Schwarzenegger had it away with the maid and worse still that he didn’t use contraception, leaving him with a secret love child which he kept … (read more)

Posted: 22nd, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)


Lindsay Lohan Too Broke For Psychological Treatment

WHAT does Lindsay Lohan do again? We can’t honestly remember. Is she some kind of clown? Either way, she’s constantly in the press for bad behaviour and reports of her … (read more)

Posted: 22nd, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Britney Spears Getting Sued For Picking Her Nose And Farting Loads

ANORAK readers are, on the whole, disgusting pigs. So are we writers of this esteemed online publication. We all sit around eating our bogeys, winding off in our ill-fitting trousers … (read more)

Posted: 21st, July 2011 | In: Celebrities, Key Posts | Comments (3)


Matt Damon Says The Incredibly Fortunate Brad Pitt Is Like A Prisoner

PEOPLE may say Matt Damon’s voice in a stupid voice all the time thanks to Team America, but he’s a happy chap. He’s got famous friends, loads of money and … (read more)

Posted: 20th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)


J Lo And Marc Anthony Split Over Infidelity, Jealousy And More!

WHILE a failed marriage must be very upsetting and distressing for those involved, its a whole heap of fun for those watching from the sidelines. Divorces don’t even have to … (read more)

Posted: 20th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Lady GaGa Says Cocaine Is The Devil, Devil Said To Be Hurt By That Comment

WHILE talking to Howard Stern, Lady GaGa decided to talk about drugs. Now, this is a woman who once said that she used to toot blow from a copy of … (read more)

Posted: 19th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Demi Lovato Isn’t Courting Ryan Phillipe, Right? Now Get Lost

LADIES and gentlemen, here we have one of those magical anti-news stories. It’s commonplace for tabloids and glossy rags to tell you things that aren’t happening, so we’re going to … (read more)

Posted: 19th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comments (3)


Justin Bieber And Selena Gomez Go And Spoil Someone’s Wedding

CHEEK! The absolute cheek! Warbling foetus Justin Bieber and his child-bride, Selena Gomez, were walking along a beach in Malibu together when they heard Bieber’s wretched song, One Less Lonely … (read more)

Posted: 18th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comments (2)


J Lo And Ex To Star In Awkward Reality TV Show Together

THE whole world was rocked to its firey foundation when Jennifer Lopez and someone called Marc Anthony (aka Booty & The Beast) decided to call time on their relationship!

‘You seemed … (read more)

Posted: 18th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Mental Joss Stone Men Appear In Court To Be Laughed At

STALKERS! We know you’re completely insane, but seriously, stalking and trying to kidnap Joss Stone? Really? That’s new levels of insanity… unless of course, you don’t love her at all … (read more)

Posted: 15th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Victoria Beckham Spends £3000 On Stretch Mark Cream – Still Of No Fixed Talent

WHEN Victoria Beckham had her bouncing bundle of inevitable disappointment, the world sighed and was glad that she’d finally had a baby girl, so we could all officially stop caring. … (read more)

Posted: 15th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comments (21)


Angelina Jolie And Brad Pitt Are Definitely, Definitely Going To Get Married, Right?

That’s right! A big ol’ wedding for the couple and their thousand adopted children to attend!

How thrilling. No really.

And it appears that it will be happening soon, with a wedding … (read more)

Posted: 14th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Charlie Sheen May Reunite With Ex Wife, Which Is Great For Their Long Suffering Children

IMAGINE being the spawn of Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller. They’ve been sat around, bored as hell, because daddy went straight and got a regular job again and mom was … (read more)

Posted: 14th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Morrissey Fans Searched For Their Meat At Gig

WHILE the big news of the week is the death of Czech painter Zdenek Sykora, one of the first to use computers for geometrical paintings, we’re more interested in meat.

That’s … (read more)

Posted: 13th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Franco Arrested For Stalking Halle Berry, Despite The Fact She’s Barely Famous These Days

STALKERS! It is fair to say that you’re all completely mental, right? You become obsessed with someone, for pretty much no reason at all. In fact, you don’t even fall … (read more)

Posted: 12th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)


Hugh Hefner Says He’s Not Dead – World Still Not Entirely Convinced

PLAYBOY founder and all-round oxygen thief  Hugh Hefner has pooh-poohed rumours he’s dead, declaring: “I’m very much alive and kicking!”

However, people are still uncertain and are inundating the heart-broken old … (read more)

Posted: 12th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)


Arnold Schwarzenegger And Mildred Are Phone Chums (Potential For Dirty Phonecalls And Sexting Then?)

CHEATING filthy secret baby-having Arnold Schwarzenegger has to admit that his marriage to Maria Shriver is over. Just like his potential. He’s peaked. His best films are behind him, he … (read more)

Posted: 11th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment


Creepy Taylor Momsen Gets Women To Strip Off While She Gyrates On Stage (Video And Photos)

THERE are people in this world who just can’t get enough attention. They crave it so much that they’re prepared to fling away their dignity just so we take some … (read more)

Posted: 11th, July 2011 | In: Key Posts, Music | Comment (1)


Jennifer Aniston In Trouble For Gay Slur: Because Homophobia Is Good Box Office Unlike Racism

UH-OH! Jennifer Aniston is in a bit of trouble at the moment. No, it’s nothing to do with those thousands of episodes of Friends where she nearly had the whole … (read more)

Posted: 8th, July 2011 | In: Film, Key Posts | Comments (4)


Cheryl Cole And Simon Cowell Are Going To Kiss And Make-Up

HATE! That’s all that has floated between Cheryl Cole and Simon Cowell since the Girls Aloud singer got unceremoniously dumped from X Factor USA. Paula Abdul was in there, stirring … (read more)

Posted: 8th, July 2011 | In: Celebrities | Comment (1)