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ANYONE heading on a one-way trip to Mars will be sent to Hell.
The fatwa committee under the General Authority of Islamic Affairs and Endowment in the UAE has decreed:
“Such a one-way journey poses a real risk to life, and that can never be justified in Islam. There is a possibility that an individual who travels to planet Mars may not be able to remain alive there, and is more vulnerable to death. Whoever opts for this hazardous trip is likely to perish for no righteous reason and thus will be liable to a punishment similar to that of suicide in the Hereafter.
“Protecting life against all possible dangers and keeping it safe is an issue agreed upon by all religions and is clearly stipulated in verse 4/29 of the Holy Quran: Do not kill yourselves or one another. Indeed, Allah is to you ever Merciful.”
HAVE you been wasting precious hours of your day wondering where A Flock of Seagulls got their name? Well, wonder no more. Before your very eyes are the etymologies of 1980s pop-synth and post-punk bands, illuminated for posterity. No more shall mankind contemplate the origin of Kajagoogoo. Mystery solved.
Named after a gang of children that Geldof had read about in Woody Guthrie’s autobiography, Bound for Glory.
Trevor Horn imagined a futuristic computer creating a synthetic band “The Buggles”, a corruption of The Beatles
Dexy’s Midnight Runners
Dexedrine, a brand of dextroamphetamine – the original ADHD medication, and a once popular recreational stimulant.
Any excuse to hear this. (Cue the school disco frenzy.)
Named after the villain in Barbarella, Dr. Durand Durand
Fine Young Cannibals
From the 1960 film All the Fine Young Cannibals starring Robert Wagner and Natalie Wood.
A Flock of Seagulls
Taken from the lyrics to “Toiler on the Sea” by The Stranglers
We ventured overland
Fought with the aliens
The young ones used their hands
Pointed the way to a flock
A flock of seagulls!
Frankie Goes to Hollywood
A random headline from the New Yorker magazine (the “Frankie” in question referred to Frank Sinatra)
A fictional band mentioned in Anthony Burgess’s novel, A Clockwork Orange.
Named after the board game. The heavy metal umlauts were added for effect.
Inspired by the band XTC and Australian jam makers IXL, they decided on a foreshortened version of “inaccessible”.
Jesus and Mary Chain
Allegedly from a breakfast cereal package which advertised that you could send off for a free Jesus and Mary chain.
A slight variation on a baby’s first sounds: gaga googoo
42 as in the answer to the meaning of life in the Douglas Adams book The Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy
Love and Rockets
After the Jaime and Mario Hernandez alternative comic books
Homage to Madness a song by reggae artist Prince Buster.
Ready to the the Rude Boy dance that anyone could do (again, any excuse):
Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark
They wanted a name that in no way would confuse them as a punk band. I think they succeeded.
Named after the Platters song The Great Pretender.
Public Image, Ltd.
After the Muriel Spark novel The Public Image
A homage to the Italian Marxist writer and political theorist Antonio Gramsci. The correct spelling in Italian to refer to “Political Writings” would have produced “Scritti Politici, but was changed to sound like the Little Richard song Tutti Frutti.
From the David Bowie song “The Jean Genie”
“Hes so simple minded he can’t drive his module,
He bites on the neon and sleeps in the capsule”
The band’s name originally was “Red”, but when the singer had to repeatedly clarify their name as “Red, simply Red”, it seemed to stick.
A combination of the nickname of MC5′s Fred “Sonic” Smith with “Youth” from reggae artist Big Youth.
The name refers to many hangings at Spandau Prison where the victims would twitch and jump (a macabre ballet) at the end of a rope.
A facetious tribute to The Velvet Underground’s oft-derided 1973 album Squeeze.
Tears for Fears
Inspired by “primal therapy”, developed by American psychologist Arthur Janov, who had John Lennon as a patient in 1970.
From the Thompson and Thompson characters from The Adventures of TinTin
Named after a Vulcan Elder on Star Trek
Originally, Huang Chung which they claimed translated to “perfect pitch” and the sound a guitar makes. The spelling was changed from “Huang” to “Wang” simply to make it easier to pronounce.
… and there you have it. You’re welcome.
Pick any historical subject and the Internet will bring it to life before your eyes. If you’re interested in vaudeville, you’ll find videos galore, while college football scholars can browse Penn State’s 1924 yearbook, complete with all the players’ names and positions. And every day, more history keeps washing up. Not long ago the news went out that a Philadelphia woman named Marion Stokes had recorded 140,000 VHS tapes of local and national news from 1977 to her death in 2012. Her collection has been acquired by the Internet Archive, and soon it will trickle onto the web.
This omnipresence of the past has weird effects on contemporary culture.
Take any genre of music, from death metal to R&B to chillwave, and the cloud directs you not just to similar artists in the present but to deep wells of influence from the past…
TO Gambia, where the country’s President Yahya Jammeh says homosexuals are akin to malaria-causing mosquitoes. They are “vermin”.
“Allah entrusted this position to Yahya Jammeh, and anybody who is averse to the decree of Allah can bite their nose.”
Jammeh made his comments not in private, but over a TV address. saying:
“We will fight these vermins [sic] called homosexuals or gays the same way we are fighting malaria-causing mosquitoes, if not more aggressively.”
FLASHBACK to 30/09/1987: BBC Radio One Breakfast Show DJ Mike Smith (right) is joined by former presenters of the early-morning slot as the network celebrates its 20th anniversary. From left: Dave Lee Travis, Noel Edmonds, Tony Blackburn and Mike Read.
What happened next?
Thalidomide was marketed as the sedative that would alleviate morning sickness. It had been sold to unsuspecting pregnant women between 1958 and late 1961, when it was removed from the market following evidence it disrupted foetal development.
IN 2005, then 18-year-old Kayla Finley rented the film Monster In Law on VHS from Dalton Video. (The film stars Jennifer Lopez, who was the top star before Kim Kardashian’s arse overtook).
Last week, Kayla went to her local police station in Pickens, South Carolina, to tell the cops about a harassment and stalking matter.
”In real life, the guy’s hair would be matted down from the helmet. The chick would be your woman instead of a New York model. And you’d be eating exhaust from a bus instead of grooving in farout fields. However, the Landlubbers are real, and they are mildly but honestly transcendent.”
CHANCES are the Brit Awards sponsor Mastercard is looking at alternative PR agencies after its opinion wranglers at House PR offered Telegraph diarist Tim Walker press accreditation in exchange for his publishing promotional tweets before, during and after the event and mentioning Mastercard in any printed reports or comments. No plugs meant no pass to the show.
Tim sent the offer to the Press Gazette. We get to see Mastercard’s request to publish pre-written tweets with the Mastercard Twitter handle and the #PricelessSurprises hashtag.
IN the UK’s trading partner, Saudi Arabia, Unaccompanied women are banned from Saudi hospitals —
Saudi Arabia’s Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and the Prevention of Vice has banned women from visiting hospitals without male guardians, reports Arab News.
Pathetic. Although Anorak sees the opportunity for doing business in professional male chaperones who like grapes and grandpa’s updates on his piles …
IN 1970 Whitney Darrow created I’m Glad I’m a Boy! I’m Glad I’m a Girl!
TRACEY Emin missed a trick. For an encore she should have disemboweled all the people she’d ever slept with and formed their wet bits into Tent Number 2. But Andrea Hasler has beaten her to it. In modern art, you need to be first.
NON-SPORTS trading cards around the 1970s generally were aimed at kids and revolved around a popular movie or TV program. They were meant for fun; for collecting and trading on the playground. Nothing serious. Subsequently, it’s all the more unsettling when you run across an old trading card that takes a walk on the dark side. Here are a seventeen insane and disturbing examples. Enjoy.
MOD SQUAD ASSAULT CARD (1968)
This doesn’t look like a child’s trading card. This looks like something a serial killer would pin to his bedroom wall.
IN Kiev’s Independence Square, people have been killed. Using stuns guns and water cannon, police moved in to smash the protestors camp. That was met with extreme violence. At the time of writing, 13 people have lost their lives, including six policemen.
FLASHBACK to 11/09/1978: Terence Harris of Porchester Terrace, Paddington – 29 year old pop musician Jet Harris – former bass guitarist with “The Shadows” – at Marlborough Street Magistrates, London, where he appeared on remand on a drink-drive charge and possession of drugs charge.
The Shadows had been Cliff Richard’s backing group. Harris left the group in 1962 following an alleged affair between his wife, Carol Costa, and Richard.
Harris is front right in the picture below.
LABOUR’S shadow welfare minister has said that Britain’s wealthiest people are just as likely to be addicted to drugs and booze. We should probably stop knocking poor people then shouldn’t we? Right?
Not likely as, you may have noticed, television has of late, turned into the poverty stricken version of bear baiting. Shows like Benefit Street and a whole variety of panel shows where Katie Hopkins gets to earn money by making people angry have corralled people with no money, pointed at them, mocked and then told them they’re not being poor properly.
HUH! NOTICE YOU’VE GOT A HUGE TV!
FLASHBACK: Manchester City’s Mike Summerbee demonstrating the built in record player in his new Swedish sports car on 17/03/1967.
A LOT of people make a lot of films, but sadly not all those films have kick-ass theme songs. This is a crying shame – AN ENORMOUSLY CRYING SHAME – because in an ideal world every film ever made would either begin or end (ideally both) with a song (not an instrumental, they don’t count) sharing a title with the film in question. Filmmakers, heed this advice. Why? Why, you say? Well…
- YOU MIGHT FINALLY GET THAT KUDOS YOU’VE BEEN AFTER Read the rest of this entry »
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THE Daily Star reports “EDL to target Legoland after Muslim HATE preacher hires park for day out - LEGOLAND has been slammed for hiring out the theme park to a hate-filled extremist preacher”. The Daily Express chimes “Far Right targets LEGOLAND after park hired by Muslim cleric for kids’ HALAL fun day”. John Ward’s story of 16th February 2014 was about Muslims hiring a theme park for a day out.
Controversial cleric Haitham al-Haddad is the head of a group that has rented the popular attraction for a Muslims Family Fun Day on March 9… The hardline cleric runs The Muslim Research and Development Foundation (MRDF), which has paid Legoland around £100,000 to open the park in Windsor, Berkshire for the event.
Having introduced readers to Haitham’s views on Jews (reportedly, he called them descendants of apes and pigs, and thus both proof of evolution and tasty) and sex (women and men “should be segregated”), we learn on the MRDF website that the day out will be ”a true alternative in which like minded families can enjoy safe and enjoyable time while at the same time conducive to their faith”.
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The changes that THC produces in the gut a process formally known as “microbial translocation,” isn’t as complicated as it sounds. During HIV infection, one of the earliest effects is that the virus spreads rapidly throughout the body and kills a significant part of cells in the gut and intestine. This activity damages the gut in a way that allows the HIV to leak through the cell wall of the intestines and into the bloodstream.
When THC is introduced into this environment, it activates the CB2 receptors in the intestines to build new, healthy bacterial cells that block the virus from leaking through the cell walls. In other words, the body works hard to keep bad stuff in the intestines and the good stuff out.
Put another way: HIV kills the cells that protect the walls— THC brings them back. Reducing the amount of the virus in the lower intestines could then help keep uninfected people uninfected.
Worth a try, no?
IN this study of 1970s life, we look at Peggy Treadwell’s The Working Couple’s Cookbook (1971). In the go-ahead 1970s of free love and wife swapping parties, the book was aimed at not only wives and husbands but “roomates, soulmates, playmates, or wedded mates”.
THAT’S a huge pooh down the toilet in Scotland. It’s a massive Winnie the Pooh teddy found lurking in Scotland’s sewers last year. Other items found:
MADELEINE McCann: Anorak’s look at the missing child in the news. The Daily Star leads with the news “MADDIE COPS AT WAR”. Has the UK finally fallen out with Portugal, her oldest ally?
News is: “Porto police bungling hunt, say Brit tecs”.
Really? The sober and expert British police on Operation Grange say the Portuguese, with whom they are working closely, are fools?
Jerry Lawton never does mention who these tecs are:
Top brass are desperate to liaise with their foreign colleagues after it emerged they are chasing different suspects. UK detectives are worried an “us against them” scenario is developing, and it could hinder attempts to find the missing girl.