The Consumer | Anorak - Part 44

The Consumer Category

We bring you the chic and unique, the best and most bizarre shopping offers both online and offline. We offer you tips on where to buy, and some of the less mainstream and crazy, individual and offbeat items on the internet. Anything that can be bought and sold can be featured here. And we love showcasing the best and worst art and design.

You Can Now Buy Back To The Future Style Hoverboards

hoverboard copy

PEOPLE have long moaned that, now we live in the future, where are our hoverboards? Well, glad you asked because some bright spark has decided to do something about it!

ZBoard have been inspired by the hoverboard in Back to the Future and manufactured a hi-tech weight sensing electric skateboard, which has the same design as the board Marty McFly rode.

The limited edition board uses a pressure pad on the front which allows you to move without ever needing to put your feet on the ground and can manage 20 miles of electrically-assisted skateboarding.

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Posted: 1st, November 2013 | In: Film, The Consumer | Comment

Ladies Room Graffiti: A Video Exposé Of What Happens When Women Leave The Table

ladies room

LADIES Room is a flies-on-the-wall look at what goes on on the ladies’ room.

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Posted: 31st, October 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment

That’s Racist: The Outrage Of Marco Pierre White’s Knorr Advert

marco jamaica copy

THERE are times when the Guardian manages to out-Guardian even itself. The last time was over the idea that the meerkat adverts are in fact racist: something which even the readers of the paper didn’t think was a likely result. Today’s example comes in a column about an ad that Marco Pierre White did for Knorr. Basically making Jamaican chicken with peas and rice by adding a couple of stock cubes to some rice, chicken and peas.

OK, it’s a pretty dreadful version of the dish but still, this is the final verdict from The G on why this is so appalling:

Beneath the tears of laughter at the hilarity of the video was the palpable and justified anger at an attempt to disregard the expertise behind Jamaican cooking. The community’s outrage at the hot mess cobbled together by MPW as “Jamaican-style” is however not just about the misrepresentation of their culinary skills. The evident lack of respect, mingled with an intention to create a marketable product was another example of cultural appropriation for wider consumption.

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Posted: 31st, October 2013 | In: Celebrities, The Consumer | Comments (2)

Great Halloween Costumes: The Human Centipede

GREAT Halloween Costumes: The Human Centipede.  More on the film of the costume here.


Posted: 31st, October 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Police Say Fight At Council Awards For Safe Wigan Pubs Never Happened

wigan bar awardsTO Wigan for the Best Bar None awards at the DW Stadium. Run by Wigan Council and the emergency services, the awards seek to make Wigan safer with awards:

Best Bar None is a national award scheme for licensed premises – rewarding pubs, bars and nightclubs that provide good management, a safe and enjoyable environment for customers…

It encourages licensees to act responsibly and take pride in their premises and surroundings and, in doing so, put something back into the town and their local community.

The biggest winners are residents and visitors to Wigan, who are able to reap the rewards of a town centre and borough that is more welcoming, attractive, lively and above all safe.

Inevitably, a fight broke out. There was not an award for the best fighting pub.

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Posted: 31st, October 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment

Shops Refuse To Sell Eggs Or Flour In Run Up To Halloween

Do you sell bricks?

The police tell us:

Don’t throw eggs or flour – it’s classed as a criminal offence and you will be arrested!

No mention of bricks. Or elephants? Or plebs:

eggs and flour ban


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Posted: 30th, October 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Arsenal And Liverpool Players Top List Of 7 Awful Premier League Haircuts

FOOTBALLERS, bless ’em, haven’t worked out the ideal formula involving brains, fashion and money. Everyone remembers Liverpool’s white FA Cup suits and eyebrows were raised when Davey Beckham wore a sarong… and not as many remember John Barnes’ ‘bird shit jacket’ he wore as a presenter on Channel 5.

However, the worst decisions footballers make tend to involve their hair. And in the Premier League, we’ve been blessed with some players who make mystifying decisions.

Here, we look at some of the ones you may have forgotten.

Cesc Fabregas

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Posted: 30th, October 2013 | In: Fashion, Sports | Comment

6 Crucial Dos And Don’ts Of Men’s Fashion

MEN’s fashion is always up for a laugh. Anorak advises keeping it simple and always tucking your vest into your Y-fronts. Jessica Saia has created this guide to men’s fashion. Spotetr: bold italic

do dont 5

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Posted: 30th, October 2013 | In: Fashion | Comment

North London Horror Stories: Hampstead Residents Can’t Find Organic Produce


download (4)“I HAVE already complained to the manager about the reduction in organic produce,” says Hampstead resident Jenny Anderson of the absence of organic stuff at her Tesco supermarket. “It used to be quite prominent, but I feel they have steadily been withdrawing the high-end organic and good quality foods over the last few months.
“Also the organic stuff they do sell is being hidden away so it’s really hard to find. It feels like they are hiding it away so no one will buy it, and then they can justify not selling it.”

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Posted: 29th, October 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment

Fail: Anti-Flea Dog Shampoo Is Not Tested On Animals

IS it any good, then?


Posted: 29th, October 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

The British Kebab And Retail Awards (RIP Kadie Nurman)

THE British Kebab and Retail Awards hope to rival the Chicken Cottage Awards.

In memoriam:

KADIR Nurman has died in Berlin. Mr Nurman is regarded as the founded of the modern kebab, creating the booze soaker in West Berlin in 1972. Mr Nurman emigrated to Germany from Turkey in 1960, did not patent his invention.

RIP. (Rest in Pita.)



Posted: 28th, October 2013 | In: Reviews, The Consumer | Comment

Hell House: Evangelical Christians Scare Children Into Following Jesus

hell house


HELL Houses will scare you kids into following the ways of Chris. They can also make you straight.

Brian Kirk told us:

“Part of salvation is being afraid of going to hell,” says the youth pastor at Trinity Church Assemblies of God in Cedar Hill, Texas. As depicted in the excellent documentary Hell House, each Halloween season Trinity Church hosts an alternative to the traditional haunted house. Instead of vampires and werewolves, guests are treated to scenes such as a young girl having an abortion, a gay man suffering from AIDS, a teen dying in an auto accident who failed to give his life to Christ. In each scenario, these presumed sinners are tormented by actors dressed as demons. The implication, none too subtle, is that each deserves both their suffering and their one-way ticket to damnation. The gay man, molested by his uncle as a child, chose to have sex and contract HIV. The teen girl chose to get drugged at a rave, raped, and become pregnant. The boy in the car wreck chose hell because he refused to listen to his parents’ religious teachings. The message of these hell houses is that the same fate awaits us all. But wait! There’s hope. These terror tours usually end with a glimpse of heaven and the opportunity to give one’s life to Jesus.

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Posted: 28th, October 2013 | In: Key Posts, Reviews, The Consumer | Comment

DIY Instructions Of The Day: Steps 1 To 3

DIY: Flat-packed hell:


Posted: 28th, October 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Ann Summers Fights Off Rampant Rabbi Marital Aide

rampant rabbi

SHED Simove has created the Rampant Rabbi, a plastic phallus that lets a toy Jewish cleric touch your innermost being and turn you on to holy love.

For £99, you can buy the device (tagline: “Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!”).

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Posted: 27th, October 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Juxtaposition Fail: The Girl’s Body In The Discount Suitcase


Posted: 26th, October 2013 | In: The Consumer | Comment

Cruel Men Critisising Their Wives’ Coffee In 1950s And 1960s Adverts (And Her Revenge)

coffee men

SHE makes terrible coffee. Sure, she has nice hair, pretty ankles and takes her prescription medication without any fuss, but that darn coffee is terrible. There is just no getting away from it.

Shaun Clayton made a study of male reactions to female coffee making in this video below. He took adverts from the 1950s and 1960s and “edited them down to just the moments when the guys were the biggest jerks to their wives about coffee”.

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Posted: 25th, October 2013 | In: Flashback, The Consumer | Comment

Gertrude Stein: A Great Rejection Letter And A Study Of The Back Of Her Head


ON April 19, 1912, Gertrude STrine received this letter from Arthur C Fifield, Publisher.

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Posted: 25th, October 2013 | In: Books, Celebrities, Flashback | Comment