Anorak

TV & Radio | Anorak - Part 90

TV & Radio Category

Television and radio programme reviews, trailers, highlights, twilights and cinema news. Also the neglected gems from years past.

Big Brother 9: House Hate Alexandra de Gale

alexandra-gale5.jpgALEXANDRA de Gale is the “most hated housemate EVER”.

The Star’s front page brings news that the Big Brother harpie is more hated than murderous London landlord John Christie; more hated than House of Commons housemate Gordon Brown; more hated than Coronation Street’s Blanche; more hated than…

A free £10 Big Brother FREE BET for all Anorak readers…

Posted: 18th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (8)


Big Brother 9: Mikey Hughes’ Blindsight For Bum Chums

mario-big-brother-mikey.jpgBIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media… 

ANORAK does not wish to offend, but might it be that Big Brother housemate Michael ‘Mikey’ Hughes, is just pretending to be blind? The Star says that the “saucy Scot gropes the girls”.

The housemate is “getting the most action in the house because he keeps grabbing the girls’ bums.”

Readers wonder if Mikey is mistaking posteriors various for household objects? Does Kat’s bumpy backside resemble his copy of Hale & Pace Do Wales? Is Lisa’s bum the same size and texture as Mickey’s front door? Is Alexandra’s tush easily confused with a Bolognese sandwich?

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Posted: 18th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment


Big Brother’s Alexandra de Gale’s I-slams Mohamed

stephanie-big-brother.pngBIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

BIG Brother’s bully elect, Alexandra da Gale, is on the cover of bother the Star and Sun.

“New race row explodes as bitch faces axe.”

No, not a race row following yesterday’s tabloid exclusive that Alex is less popular than the Black Death, but one triggered by “BB ALEX’S MUSLIM RANT”, says the Star.

Want to hear the rant? Send grandma from the room and turn down the brightness on your set:

Says Alex to Mohamed, her fellow housemate:

“Because you are Muslim, you look down on us.”

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Posted: 17th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (16)


Dr Raj Pesaud Admits Plagiarism

THE TV media knows, and how does he know?

Psychiatrist and broadcaster Dr Raj Persaud has admitted plagiarising material for a book and articles published under his name.

Dr Persaud, who practises in south London, is appearing before a General Medical Council hearing in Manchester.

The former Radio 4 presenter admitted plagiarising four articles for his 2003 book From the Edge Of The Couch.

But he denied that his actions were dishonest and were liable to bring his profession into disrepute.

No more so than appearing on TV show and handing out pop platitides…

Posted: 16th, June 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (7)


Austria V Germany

BBC broadcast Austria v Germany in 2008. Cue Gary Lineker:.

Germany annexed Austria in 1938…

Lest we forget…

Posted: 16th, June 2008 | In: Back pages, TV & Radio | Comments (2)


The CNN Moos With John McCain

ASKING a question of John McCain should be easy. This man in the video finds it tricky.

But rather than him being the story, Anorak cannot get pass the commentator, the closed-voiced woman called Jeanne Moos, whose vocal impression of a surprised Fozzy Bear swallowing snot brings us the noos, sorry, news.

Jeanne works for CNN, which features the long-question as news, and makes it longer by boosting it with Moos’s voiceovers.

McCain’s interrogator should consider applying for a job as a nodding head on a 24-hour news channel…

Posted: 16th, June 2008 | In: Politicians, TV & Radio | Comment


Wishing Black Death On Alexandra De Gale

alexandra-black-death.jpgBIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

BIG BROTHER’S Alexandra da Gale is now as “POPULAR AS THE PLAGUE”.

No, not the plague of reality TV contestants that infiltrate our telly and news organs – Alex is as popular as the Black Death.

A spokesman for Ladbrokes, which has Alex at 125-1 to win Big Brother, says: “Alex is about as popular as the plague with punters.”

 Get a free bet hereTouchy and demonised Alex is black. She is now the tabloids’ Black Death. There may be room for a race row here, and the Sun must surely hope there is.

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Posted: 16th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (2)


BBC Think Tank Fish Tank Looks Into Viewer Habits

tv-fish-tanks.jpgIN “Cost-cutting BBC spends thousands – on a fish tank”, the Mail says BBC “bosses are spending thousands of pounds a year on maintaining a fish tank”.

Anorak recalls the man who on being nabbed for non payment of his TV licence offered the excuse: “That’s not a TV, it’s a fish tank.”

Might this BBC’s tank be part of an investigation into viewer habits – can you spot the difference between the daily goings on in a fishtank and, say, two episodes of EastEnders, a month’s worth of Question Time or anything on BBC 3?

Is TV just something viewers put on to stare at, and if the BBC replaced its Breakfast show with a fish would anyone mind, let alone mind that the presenters had been replaced by two fat–lipped pouting cod?

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Posted: 15th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (5)


Chicken Run Is A Zionist Training Video

IN Module One of our Middle East Media Studies course, Anorak showed you that Tom and Jerry are part of a Zionist conspiracy.

Now in Module 2, we tell you that Chicken Run, the film in which Messiah Chicken is voiced by Jew lover Mel Gibson, is part of a Zionsits conspiracy.

chicken-run-jews.JPG

Cue Iranian TV:

Unfortunately, Zionist notions can be detected in children’s movies, from the days of Walt Disney and to TV animation films.

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Posted: 14th, June 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (3)


Gay Marriages: Come On Down To The Farm

Gay marriages – Come on down to the farm

Thanks Charlie Chivers

Posted: 14th, June 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comment (1)


Big Brother: Imogen’s Zoo PhotoShop Workout

imogen-big-brother-photoshop.jpgBY now you’ll be wondering what happened to Imogen Thomas from Big Brother.

Well, since she left the show she bought some off the peg breasts and posed for a lads mag.  

The pictures went to the airbrushing department and we saw the new Imogen and a shadow of the old Imogen…

Then the sky caved in, darkness descended and Imogen for her teeth whitenened and… 

Spotter

Posted: 14th, June 2008 | In: Photojournalism, TV & Radio | Comments (6)


Learning To Hate Big Brother’s Alexandra de Gale

alexandra-gale4.jpgBIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

WHAT does it matter that Osama bin Laden has not been caught and the Germans are playing football without us when we can all rally round and learn to hate Big Brother’s Alex De Gale?

Today’s chance to loathe Alex comes once again in the Mirror, where we lean that she “bullied girls at her old job”.

Talking about Alex’s time in Thomson Directories telesales in Purley, Surrey, Jake Homatas tells the paper: “She made a lot of enemies. She bullied girls or people who can’t carry themselves in conversation. She thrives on intimidation and ran over them verbally.”

Alex’s conversation technique is to affect an air of extreme touchiness and then bang on and on that you breaving her air is a violaytion of her personable spayce. Anyone seeking a right to reply or run is brought up short by Alex’s verbal tic of creating new words.

She is less the product of , as she claims, than someone who has been preparing for Big Brother by listening to the collected thoughts of John Prescott.

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Posted: 14th, June 2008 | In: Politicians, Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (4)


Gordon Brown Does The Apprentice

the-apprentice.jpgLEE McQueen has won The Apprentice TV show, and with his dream office job in Brentwood comes the “fury”.

Fury is how tabloid readers react to just about anything from the Madeleine McCann saga to Coronation Street being moved to Thursday nights to make way for the football.

Today’s fury is being directed at “the decision to award a £100,000 job in this year’s The Apprentice to a salesman who lied on his CV”.

McQueen claimed to have studied at Thames Valley University for two years, but in reality he remained on a course for a mere four months. He might have learned it all in that time, but this is not the point.

Such is the fury that the Mail says “even the Prime Minister” has weighed into the outcry in the “business community”. Yeah, even Arctic Monkeys fan Gordon. Next he’ll be cosying up to the McCanns and humming the theme song to children’s TV shows.

Says Gordon Brown:

“I think people should tell the truth. I think in this case someone exaggerated what they had done. [Sir] Alan Sugar is perfectly capable of making his decisions and we should support him in the decision that he made. But generally my advice to people is to tell the truth when they are applying for jobs. Because as was found in this case, it always comes out anyway and it became known that an exaggeration had been made.”

That the Government supports Sir Alan Sugar’s is of interest; it may even be right for Sugar to now support Brown. But what of Gordon Brown who never had to apply for his current job, the role of prime minister being handed to him on a plate.

But if his CV is the Labour Party manifesto, one might admire his, as Alan Sugar would say, chutspa.

Posted: 13th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (6)


Big Brother 9 Quote Of The Day

baby_tattoo.jpgBIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

Big Brother quote Of the day:

“Yes I went through child birth; yes I went through tattoos. But a strong woman can only take so much”

– Alexandra de Gale, Big Brother

Posted: 13th, June 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (5)


Big Brother Slapdancer Alexandra De Gale’s No Touching Rule

alexandra-gale3.jpg BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

MORE news on Alexandra de Gale, who now functions as the Star and Mirror’s Big Brother standard bearer.

“BIG BRO ALEX FACES BOOT,” announces the Star. “Fans fury over rows.”
The show’s “producers are shocked by the ex-lapdancer’s angry rants and the hundreds of viewer complaints”.

Shocked? We thought ythsi is how she is expected to behave? What is it about lapdancers that makes them so argumentative? And how long until they’re called slapadancers, offering punters a happy slap and some verbal abuse?

“I’d appreciate it if no-one touches my things,” says Alexnadra, taking the no touching rule beyond the lap and the pole. She asks: “Why do people think they can violate my property?”

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Posted: 13th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (6)


Big Brother 9: Alexandra De Gale’s Of The Unexpectable

alexandra-gale2.jpg BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

ALEXANDRA de Gale is this year’s Big Brother Bully elect.

Alex has been handed the Big Brother phrase books and finds it her lot to demand “respect”, have hissy fits at the slightest things and demand that everyone keeps it “real”.

The early series’ promise of sex has been replaced by a lust for the next big row.

After the jump are a collection of Alex’s bon mots to date, as told by the Daily Mirror. The paper has come over all Daily Mail, pursing its lips like a vicar flicking through a pornographic magazine and being too appalled to look away.

Old Mr Anorak is also appalled by the language, and finds this comment of Alex’s worthy of rage, fury and bemusement:

“We’re here. We’re living the dream. The unexpectable is very close.”

Best watch out…

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Posted: 12th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (10)


Daily Express Does The Apprentice

daily-express-newpaper-headlines.jpgTHE papers can’t get enough to The Apprentice.

In “THE APPRENTICE HOT SHOTS: WHERE ARE THEY NOW?,” the Express looks at those losers who scored that office job in Brentwood.

Here’s on Ruth Badge, billed by the paper’s professional and not in the least way apprentice workers as “Ruth Badger won series 2”.

Only, she didn’t win. She came second – unlike the Express writer, who got the job at the World’s Greatest Newspaper…

Posted: 12th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comment (1)


The Apprentice: Alex Wotherspoon Is…

alex-wotherspoon.jpgMORE The Apprentice journalist nonsense on the BBC where failed contestant Alex Wotherspoon is billed as: “Age: 25.”

If viewers of the show have learned anything it is surely that pouty Alex is 24, a fact he trots out like a aged aunt telling all and sundry “I’m 89, you know”…

As they say at the BBC: You’re hired…

Posted: 12th, June 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (13)


The Big Brother Bullying Row II: The Making Of A Tabloid Enemy

alexandra-gale1.jpgBIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

THE Big Brother Bully story cranks up a notch, working its way up from yesterday’s front page of the Star to the Mirror’s lead news story.

“Exclusive,” announces the paper, “Big Brother in bullying row – Channel embroiled in shocker more shameful than Jade’s Shilpa attack.”

Good news indeed for those of you who enjoyed the organised bigotry of Celebrity Big Brother past but feared you’d never see the likes again.

A free £10 Big Brother FREE BET for all Anorak readers…

Like the Mirror, we look over yesterday’s news and hear Alexandra De Gale telling one Rachel Rice: “You’re getting on my f*****g nerves – I don’t give a f*** what you think.”

Not since Anorak caught the No.38 bus yesterday morning has such language been heard in public. For shame.

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Posted: 12th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (10)


Lee McQueen Dodges The Apprentice Bullet

the-apprentice-lee-mcqueen.jpgLEE McQueen is the winner of this year’s Apprentice challenge. To him the spoils of an office job in Brentwood.

The Scotsman’s front page says the “bookies are not the only ones who made a mistake” and Alan Sugar erred when she passed over “feisty” Claire Young.

Someone should tell the Scotsman’s writers that bookies don’t make mistakes when the favourite loses and that when an outsider wins they make money. They should also tell the Scotsman that no bets were taken on The Apprentice because the show is recorded in advance and therefore open to cheating.

But under pressure, the Scotsman’s trainee hacks begin to gab, saying that “Claire’s vicious boardroom attack on Simon the arrogant bank manager after the photography task may have been unpleasant, but a lot of what she said was right on the money”.

That would be Simon the satellite installation engineer by day and, one assumes, bank manager by night?

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Posted: 12th, June 2008 | In: Broadsheets, TV & Radio | Comments (7)


Big Brother 9, Darnell And Tanzania’s War On Albinos

DARNELL, Big Brother 9’s albino black man may spend so long with the housemates he ends up orange. And that might just save his skin:  

Mr. Mluge is an albino, and in Tanzania now there is a price for his pinkish skin.

“I feel like I am being hunted,” he said.

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Posted: 11th, June 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comments (7)


Big Brother 9: Alexandra De Gale Blows Off

alexandra-gale.jpg BIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

“BIG BRO IN NEW RACE ROW FEAR,” screams the Star.

The house is on the verge of “all out war”, says the paper. It’s an “X-rated bust up”. Tempers have “exploded”.

Alexandra De Gale, an outreach worker version of last season’s Charlie Uchea, is telling Rebecca Shiner: “You’re getting on my f****** nerves, you p****. I don’t give a f*** what you think!”

A free £10 Big Brother FREE BET for all Anorak readers…

Indeed, dear readers, it is now ok to refer to a women as a p****, so forwarding the female equality movement.

Rispeckt due to Alex, whose extreme touchiness demands it…

Posted: 11th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (23)


Big Brother 9: Rebecca Shiner’s One Woman Romp

rebecca-shiner.pngBIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

BIG Brother’s Rebecca Shiner has taken off her top. Or, as the Star puts it on its front page: “Big Brother wild child Rebecca Shiner launched a wild swimming pool sex romp with a boob-flashing game of truth or dare.”

Before fame tapped her on the shoulder and unhooked her bra, Rebecca was a nursery nurse from Coventry. Mums and dada leave their children with Rebecca, or they did.

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Posted: 10th, June 2008 | In: Tabloids, TV & Radio | Comments (8)


Big Brother 9: Mario Opens His Eyes To Michael

big-brother-mario.jpgBIG Brother 9 Watch: Anorak’s looks at Big Brother news in the media…

MARIO is in the kitchen with Michael. Wag-alike Stephanie walks in and wants access. Mario:

“Food comes first. Mikey’s got a disability – open your eyes”

Michael is blind…

Get rid of the aged Buzz Lightyear – A free £10 Big Brother FREE BET for all Anorak readers…

Posted: 10th, June 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comment


The Barack Obama Fist Bump To 24 Hour Rolling News

“TELL me about the Barack and Michelle Obama’s fist bump,” commands the blonde with the stuck-in the-craw contraceptive voice. The fist thump. The Fisting.

“What happened to..the hug?” Well, there was that sexual harassment case in Oregon and …

George Bush did a chest bump. “What does that mean?” It means he’s American. Bumping chests is what Americans do in the country’s big two rackets: porn and politics.

“Has our communications style changed as a culture in America – non verbal communication?” – like bombs, rolling your eyes a lot and the finger?

Did Obama flip a finger to Hillary Clinton? Yes, he did. Only, Obama flips the finger with his thumb – he’s all about change – and has been flipping the finger to just about everyone of us for years.

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Posted: 9th, June 2008 | In: TV & Radio | Comment