Politicans and world leaders making news and in the news, and spouting hot air
LOOK out Boko Haram. You Islamist nutjobs have nothing our our Prime Minister, David Cameron. Sure, you’ve got over 200 girls in our dungeon in the wilds of Nigeria. Sure, you want to forcibly marry them off to be raped for your perverted view of spiritualism. But Dave has a hashtag. He has Twitter.
THE cameraman could have moved a bit to the right. But the man form the BNOP wasn’t shifting. So. We get to see Nigel Farage, UKIPs sole voice, standing before the word “TWAT”.
TO Sussex, where the MP for Lewes, Liberal Democrat Norman Baker, is in the mire. He can’t spell the name of his constituency.
Poor old Norma left off a letter, making Sussex ‘Susex’.
These small things matter at erection time for the men in the gay suites.
(Ok, enough already – ed).
SARAH Palin was once destined to be the president of the USA’s VeePee. She would be a heartbeat away from becoming Leader of the Free World. Recently the former Alaskan governor spoke to the National Rifle Association’s yearly convention in Indianapolis.
The highlight of her chat was he telling the good folks “waterboarding is how we baptize terrorists.”
A 7-FT TALL STATUE of Satan could soon be sat on the lawns before the Oklahoma State Capitol next to a monument of the ten commandments, pictured below. Note the spellings of “SABETH” and “MAIDSERAUNT”. The Divine hand was big on Creation but not too hot on spelling.
THE hacker with the Anonymous group known only as @Anon_0x03 has gained access to the Twitter account of British National Party’s chairman Nick Griffin. You’ll remember him from that time before Nigel Farage became the go-to face of intolerance. Onr theory is that UKIP leader Farage’s sole mission is to destroy the BNP vote. After all, UKIP is an empty vessel into which people can pour their pet hates and prejudices.
So. What did the hackers twitter from @nickgriffinmep?
Nick Griffin has apologised to his followers for a series of grammatically correct & inoffensive tweets posted after his account was hacked.
just wish someone funny who could really have gone to town had hacked it.
HackRead records a few of the tweets, which are crude and could have been much funnier:
The Telegraph reports an exchange that suggests the hacker had little idea what a Nick Griffin is:
What are you actually going to do with the account now you’ve got it? @bnp”one user tweeted to the hacker.
No sure, any ideas? I don’t really give a ****. It was just a random target. I’m not even from GB,” the hacker replied
We leave you with a few more tweets:
Nick Griffin and the BNP have been more ludicrous…
WHEN you see one efit that looks like David Cameron, you laugh.
This one was issued by police in Stockbridge, Hampshire, seeking a man who had conned an elderly woman of £60.A police spokesperson says
And now we see another efit of ‘Dave’ and it’s get us thinking…
Just me, or for this criminal look a lot like the PM? pic.twitter.com/aTyzXsZc9i
— Luke McGee (@lukemcgee) May 1, 2014
UKIP, once derided as “loonies” have issued a set of posters that look a little familiar.
Spotters: Independent, Private Eye
NIGEL Farage, leader of Ukip - sole mission: to destroy The BNP- has been hit by a bout of improvised hand gesturing as he stood outside the Bell Inn in Bath, now renamed the Bell End.
DID you see those new UKIP posters, the ones warning about foreigners coming over here to take our jobs?
The man in the frame was there to illustrate “British workers” being “hard hit by unlimited cheap labour”. He is seen begging. He is one of the hard hit.
THANKS to Nick Clegg (wage: £134,565 a year) and his wife Miriam González Durántez (wage: 500,000 a year), we know how to raise our children. Miriam interrupted a speech by Nick on how men should get time off work to care for the kids (he says men must see themselves are carers not breadwinners) to tells us that men who look after their children have “more cojones”.
He told the audience of working parents that he and Miriam shared the work after their birth of their three sons, Antonio, Alberto and Miguel.
Nick has cojones the size of a nanny from Belgium.
UNFORTUNATE UKIP ad placement:
GEORGE W. Bush’s paintings have been adapted to feature on pillows, bags, throws and clocks. Bush’s collection - “The Art of Leadership: A President’s Personal Diplomacy” – features the faces of his dad, Tony Blair, Vladimir Putin and Hamid Karzai.
WHO wants to be Nigel Farage’s PA? That’s not euphemism. You won’t have to sleep with him. He’s not a Cabinet Minister.
Granted, his current PA does get to inhale his man-of-the-people’s breath after a night in the Pint & Castella. HE;s his wife – his German-born wife. And he can enter the contest to find her replacement on the website of recruitment firm Xpat Jobs.
THE Journal Star has caught up with Jacob Elliott. He was arrested in the war on free speech. The Mayor or Peoria, one Jim Ardis, was very upset at the fake Twitter account, @Peoriamayor. He called the police.
Rather than laugh at Mr Ardis and advise him to respond to the spoof blog with humour and smiles, the police thought he had made a good point. How very dare anyone mock the Mayor. You can mock Jesus, God, Mohammed and even George Clooney, but mocking the Mayor of Peoria is a step too far.
Three judges agreed.
Judge Kirk Schoebein signed off on a warrant seeking subscriber information from Twitter.
Judge Lisa Wilson approved a warrant for Comcast to find out where the person who used the Internet to access Twitter lived
Judge Kim Kelley signed the warrant to search the home of the alleged parodists.
Respect for the man and his office must be preserved.
ED Miliband has been in Israel, rediscovering his Jewish roots.
The Daily Mail quotes the Labour leader as saying: “I would be the first Jewish prime minister if we win the election.”
THE War on Free Speech marches into Starkville, Mississippi, where police are seeking the master criminals who lampooned Starkville Aldermen David Little and Ben Carver using the Twitter accounts @DavidLittleBOA and @BenCarverPray.
The Daily Dolt notes:
The two aldermen came under fire recently after instigating the removal of Starkville’s highly popular Chief Administration Officer Lynn Spruill without providing any reason for the coup other than Carver’s comment that he “prayed” about it and God told him to kick her to the curb (hence the parody handle @BenCarverPrays).
THERE’S an interesting little tactic that Labour MPs are trying to use in the House of Commons these days. To ask questions about how much a department is spending on this or that and then when they get the answer they can chunter along about how poor widows are being thrown out of their homes over the bedroom tax so that Tory Ministers can spend £x on whatever it is they just asked about.
You know, Yah! Boo! The Tories and only Labour looks out for the working stiff.
This is a tactic that has just received some blowback as the answer given to the question, well, how much has Eric Pickles been spending on catering (given his size this would add another level of joy to the chuntering) was, well, a whole hell of a lot less than Labouir did when they were in power.
MARIA Miller has written an open letter to the people of Basingstoke, Hampshire:
“The last 16 months have been difficult. As you know, I have been working hard for Basingstoke and also doing my job as a Cabinet minister. During this time, I have been subject to an intense Parliamentary inquiry looking at extensive personal details of my family life, as a result of allegations made by a Labour MP.
“That committee has now published its report and I have accepted their findings in full. I have unreservedly apologised for the way I handled and apporached [sic] the inquiry.
“And I am pleased that the committee has fully dismissed all of the allegations made against me. Separately, I have already apologised and repaid an over-claim of my expenses, having myself drawn the committee’s attention to the matter immediately I was aware of it.
“I have always sought to do the best job that I can in representing the people of Basingstoke in Westminster. I am devastated that this has happened, and that I have let you down.
“I can only hope that over time the focus will once again by on Basingstoke.”
IN 1865, Seth Kinman (1815-1888), the California Hunter and Trapper, gave US President Andrew Johnson a GRIZZLY-BAR CHAIR.
MARIA Miller is the Tory MP and Culture Secretary. She is involved in discussions over the future of press regulation. She wants more of it. She is just one of the cross-party elite (and you can include artists in this illiberal group) who like free speech but want to insert a “but” after it. She wants limits on freedom.
Mrs Miller’s in trouble over her expense.
Kathryn Hudson, the Parliamentary Standards Commissioner looked at Miller’s expenses. She did the sums and found that Mrs Miller’s claims for mortgage interest payments exceeded her allowance by £44,000. Mrs Hudson made her report. Mrs Miller issued a 75-word apology. Miller agreed to repay £5,800 in over-claimed allowances and apologised for her “attitude” to the official inquiry.
FLASHBACK to April 10 2004: The ‘Bin Laden Determined To Strike In US’ Memo: