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Exam Board

‘“A B ISN’T bad considering I forgot to take the exam,” says the boy to his friend in a cartoon on the Times’s front cover. ‘You’ve passed. It … (read more)

Posted: 18th, August 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Three Lions In The Sand

‘IT’S been tough but after the hour-long break, the football season is on once again. ‘The Siegfried Lion, The Maginot Lion and the, er, …’ … (read more)

Posted: 17th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

The Fallen Madonna

‘“MADONNA HORSE FALL HORROR,” yells the front page of the Mirror. And at once we fear the worse. Time for Madonna to move on? Ever since … (read more)

Posted: 17th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

A-Level Playing Field

‘LONG gone is the sense of impending doom as the A-level student hears the letterbox rattle and sees there, lying on the doormat, the letter containing their exam results. … (read more)

Posted: 17th, August 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Doubting Tom

‘ANY idea what today’s big news story is? We only ask in the hope that if you have any idea – any idea at all – you will tell the … (read more)

Posted: 16th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Class Rebel

‘AFTER yesterday’s story about how any student with a pen, or at least the intention of one day owning one, is given an A-level comes more news from the confused … (read more)

Posted: 16th, August 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Jordan’s Doubles

‘SO used are we to seeing photos of Jordan and hearing tales of her life with singing acorn Peter Andre that when we sight lots of blonde hair and a … (read more)

Posted: 16th, August 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Pool Of Talent

‘WASN’T Big Brother am-ay-zing! It’s the only way to stop the itching The bit where whatshisname did that thing with whatshisname and whathisname was looking … (read more)

Posted: 16th, August 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Taking A Liberty

‘“WELCOME HOME MUMMY!” says OK!, speaking on behalf of Molly and Lilly-Sue Katona-McPadding, and the nation at large. But can Heaton get her tongue out? After … (read more)

Posted: 16th, August 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Logan’s Run

‘“A MERE three weeks ago, TV soccer presenter Gabby Logan was roughly the shape of a football,” says the Mail informatively. ‘The nanny’s taking the kids for … (read more)

Posted: 16th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Skirting The Issue

‘EDITORIAL guidance at the Mail seemingly stipulates that any story on binge drinking must be illustrated with a shot of one or more fanciable young woman in a short skirt … (read more)

Posted: 15th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

A Is For Easy

‘IT’S August and that means it time to run the story about how A-levels are getting easier. ‘2B Oar Knot 2B’ Though the results for this … (read more)

Posted: 15th, August 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Bakri & Forth

‘THE week read like the Diary of Omar Barki. The Tottenham Taliban was in Lebanon seeing his mum/raising an army/going on the lash with the lads.But before he could make … (read more)

Posted: 15th, August 2005 | In: Broadsheets | Comment

The Bench Markers

‘WHAT is it about seeing a five-year-old boy in the full Manchester united kit walking along a Dorset beach that makes me want to go up to him and laugh … (read more)

Posted: 15th, August 2005 | In: Back pages | Comment

Estate Of The Nation

‘OF course, the real question that lies at the heart of any debate on terror is what impact it has on house prices. ‘It’s a minute’s walk from … (read more)

Posted: 12th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Home & Away

‘SINCE everything is about the war on terror, at least in the papers’ minds, let’s consider today’s news as a whole. Tony Blair goes away and the following things occur: … (read more)

Posted: 12th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Any Port In A Storm

‘HELLO! prides itself on having an inside track on the lives of the European elite. The old sea dogger It visits stylish eateries where a … (read more)

Posted: 12th, August 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment (1)

Ivana Be Alone

‘IVANA Trump is 56. And the temptation to end this instalment of the life of the yellow-haired ex-Mrs Trump is all too delicious. Hide! But we … (read more)

Posted: 12th, August 2005 | In: Reviews | Comment

Ground Staff Day

‘“AFTER all that’s gone on in London, this is the last thing Britain needs,” says the quote that runs atop the Telegraph’s pages two and three. Passengers are … (read more)

Posted: 12th, August 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Heart Attack

‘OUT of sight but not out of mind, the life and times of Omar Bakri continue to fascinate the papers. ‘Barking’ Omar Bakri at his Lebanon training camp … (read more)

Posted: 11th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Had Dad

‘“HE’S got his father’s red hair,” says the newspaper on seeing photos of young Prince Harry. “Nonsense!” says another. “It’s those proud ears that display his Royal heritage.” … (read more)

Posted: 11th, August 2005 | In: Uncategorized | Comment

Big Bother

‘EVEN the most ardent Big Brother avoider cannot have failed to spot ex-contestant Orlaith McAllister’s surgically-enhanced chest. ‘Makosi supposi her tosie is rosie’ And for those … (read more)

Posted: 11th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

Demi Pair

‘DEMI and Leo, Walford’s very own Romeo and Juliet for the Chav nation, are about to discover that true love doesn’t always triumph, especially when there’s a ratings war on. … (read more)

Posted: 10th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

A Galaxy Of Stars

‘WHILE we cannot find Osama bin Laden, Lord Lucan or Anthea Turner on planet Earth, the intrepid Sun announces that it has spotted Victor Meldrew in space. Meldrew … (read more)

Posted: 10th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

The Come Back Kid

‘YESTERDAY the Sun told us that it had forced Omar Bakri, the ubiquitous face of Muslim extremism in the UK, out of the country. ‘Does Prezza hit men … (read more)

Posted: 10th, August 2005 | In: Tabloids | Comment

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